Ice that Fuels Fire
by Sub-Zero879
Summary: -Old- At the age of 7, Naruto is almost broken, he turns cold and fearless, into the intrest of Kyuubi. Naruto x Female Kyuubi.
1. The Change

Some OOCness. I'm not the greatest writer ever too so don't start saying stuff like 'My great Obaasan can write better than you!' because it's most likely true. There will be Omakes. Anyway, please read.

**Disclaimer**: don't own Naruto. Only own my house (box), computer (wires hooked to 80's TV), and Churro at Halo 2.

**Bwahahahaha!** Kyuubi

_Moron..._ Thoughts

(tap) Sound effects/authors notes

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(tap) (tap) (tap)

The soft, entrancing drizzle awoke young 7 year old Naruto. He slowly opened his sleep deprived eyes. Noticing the blur, he brought a hand up to rub his eyes. The burning pain in his arm reminded him of the hard training he had the day before. _I hate you Itachi-sensei. You train me too hard._

He turned his head to the side, to look at the time. He found his clock smashed. _Mob #4. Man, I don't have the money for a new clock._ He turned to the window, but only saw clouds with a light down pour. The gently tapping on his cracked window was beginning to lull him back to sleep. He shook his head quickly in effort to fight the sleep off, but then deeply regretted it for it brought massive pain coursing through his body.

(tap) (tap) (tap)

After the pain subsided, he got a feeling; a sense of dread filled him. He didn't sense anyone nearby. Again he had to thank Itachi for teaching him. Itachi taught him how to pick up on chakra signatures, just incase he needed to escape from the occasional mob or assassinations. Shaking off the feeling, he slowly got out of his bed, wincing every time he moved a soar muscle.

A glance on his dresser revealed a pair of goggles- a birthday present that Itachi gave him. He tied it around his head, a feeling of pride welled up within him. He imagined it as the Konoha headband that all the real ninjas use.

(tap) (tap) (tap)

He checked his cupboard for food, only to find that it was raided again. He looked inside the fridge; he found only rotten milk and moldy bread, _better than nothing._ He poured a glass of milk and placed the last of the bread on his plate. He starred hard at the plate, the taste from his nibbling and sipping of his breakfast completely off his mind. He was thinking on what to do this day. He knew that Itachi was forced to train during the rain by his sensei, but he didn't know if Itachi wanted him to train during this weather as well.

He remembered the look Itachi got on his face when he finally hit the bull's eye with a kunai- it was pride, pride that he, Naruto, was finally learning. It brought joy to Naruto, knowing that he did something that brought his sensei out of his depression. That set his to do list for the day: master something else so Itachi will be happy again.

(tap) (tap) (thud) (crack)

Itachi was currently training his heart out. His sensei left him with the instructions to destroy 50 trees with a single kick each. This was normally an easy task; had not his sensei moved him to the part of the forest where only thick oak trees grow. It did not help that he was on 27 and his foot felt like it was on fire.

He wondered if he should train Naruto today. The dull throbbing in his foot reminded him of its pain. He decided to nurse his foot this day and give an excuse on how little kids shouldn't be active during the rain, they could get sick. And nobody needed to tell Naruto that the Kyuubi would prevent any sicknesses. A little lie wouldn't hurt. With that plan decided, he moved on to the next tree. 1.5 meters thick. Oh joy.

(tap) (tap) (poof)

Naruto looked at his clone and sighed. Its face was a ball except for the single yellow spike of hair on the top. The white shirt was okay though, it was just missing the red Konoha symbol. His loose shorts were skin tight on the clone. All of the clone's skin was white too. All in all, better than the last, but not even close to passable.

He dispelled the clone and tried again. He focused on an image of himself. "BUSHIN NO JUTSU!" He yelled while focusing on chakra control. Again, the chakra spiked, it was like there was another chakra source conflicting with it. But that was impossible, wasn't it. He looked at his clone; it was the same, except its skin was now an unhealthy pale skin color, two sky blue circles where the eyes should be, and a new yellow spike of hair. He sensed someone approaching and hid in a nearby tree.

(tap) (squish) (tap) (squish)

"Naruto-san, I know you're there. You never dispelled you clone so you have to be close," called a teenage voice, and Naruto could tell the owner of the voice was trying to not let depression leak into it.

Naruto jumped out of the tree with a sheepish expression on his face, with his hand behind his head, "Um, hi Itachi-sensei! I was training while I was waiting for you to come."

Itachi sighed; there goes the nursing of his foot. He was 100 percent sure that something broke. Maybe an excuse would work, "good evening Naruto-san, I came here to inform you that you shall not be training today in this weather." _Please work…_

"Sure, but can you tell me how I can make a bushin with my chakra spiking?" Naruto asked.

"Sure thing Naruto-san, think as your chakra as a flowing river. Now everyone's flows straight, but yours has a bend in it. You are trying to go straight when it turns, causing the deformation. I want you to use that turn, learn how big it is, and flow with it. But that is for later, I'm sorry, but I don't have food for you today though."

"Oh, well I was just about to go get ramen anyway. So, see you later Itachi-sensei," he replied, trying and failing to not sound disappointed. Itachi almost felt a little sad, and probably would have taught him something if his foot didn't remind him of its needs. Naruto turned around and started heading towards the ramen shop. Itachi watched him go before turning around and limping back to his house.

(tap) (tap) (tap)

Naruto gladly listened to the sounds of the rain as it hit the buildings. He soon became entranced and didn't notice where he was going until he bumped into an elderly man. Naruto, fearing this man would beat him like the other villagers, began to apologize, "I'm so sorry sir, I didn't mean to, I was listening to the rain and didn't notice where I was going, and I'm so sorry."

The man was surprised at how polite this little kid was. As a matter of fact he was enjoying the rain as well which is why he wasn't able to avoid the collision. But something about the way the boy spoke bothered him, it was the tone of a hopeless man trying to avoid the punishment he knew would come anyway. He wondered why until he saw the whisker marks on the boy's cheeks. _So this is what the village reduced their hero to? I am so sorry boy._ "No it was my fault young lad. What's your name boy?"

Naruto looked up with a huge smile on his face, realizing that this man would like to be friends, "My name is Uzumaki Naruto, and one day I'm going to be the greatest kage ever!"

The man smiled at Naruto. He briefly wondered why he said 'kage' instead of 'hokage', before dismissing it. "Well future greatest kage, my name is Aino Masa. I am part of the village council." He paused for a second, "so, where were you heading Naruto-san?"

"I was going to raid the trash cans for ramen," replied Naruto, completely unaware of the dark look that crossed Masa's face.

"Why would you do that, Naruto-san? Why wouldn't you just eat good food at your house?" He asked, a little curious and dreading the answer.

"That's easy, discarded ramen is wasting the greatest gift of the gods, and discarded ramen is a thousand times better than rotten milk and moldy bread." Naruto was unaware of the look Masa was giving the passerby's.

_How could anyone do this to such a young child? Please forgive me for not being there for you sooner, Naruto._ "Hey Naruto-san, I was just heading for my house, where my wife was making dinner, and I was wondering… would you like to have a fresh dinner at my house?"

Naruto was beyond shocked, not only did this man not beat him, he also acknowledged his dream, and is now offering him dinner. A feeling of joy spread through his body. _Is this what love feels like? I feel like this when I make Itachi smile too._ "Of course I'll come Masa-jiisan! I hope your wife makes ramen!"

(tap) (squish) (tap) (squish)

Itachi limped through the gate. He noticed something was off, many of the chakra signatures were gone and a foreign one was here. _Looks like a group mission is going on and maybe Sasuke brought home a friend._ A smell filled his nose; he noticed it in one sniff- smoke. Before he could continue that train of thought, a building to his left exploded. The intoxicating smell of fire, burnt flesh, and death filled his nose.

His best friend, Ryoga, ran out of the building. Ryoga fixed a glare of such hate on him that Itachi was sure the flower next to him just died. Ryoga spoke, "Itachi! Prepare to DIE!"(1) And he charged.

Itachi was lost; the Uchiha manor was under attack by someone and his BEST FRIEND attacks him. He dodged a flurry of shuriken and kunai. Ryoga, seeing that Itachi dodged them all, rushed in and attempted to kill him in taijutsu. Itachi weaved in and out of Ryoga's stabs and kicks. Ryoga jumped back, "because of you, I have seen hell!"(2) He shot a fire jutsu at Itachi, "why did you kill my parents? WHY!" He rushed back in.

Itachi charged in as well, but that phrase put him in a brief shock, which allowed him to forget about his hurt foot, causing him to flinch by land on it, and giving an opportunity to jam a kunai in his chest. Itachi stared blankly at the metal in his chest- 2 centimeters above a main artery and 3 centimeters from his lung.

Self-preserve takes over Itachi's concern for his friend, and he makes a counter attack. A well placed knee lands in Ryoga's solar plexus, causing him to back off with no wind in his lungs, and Itachi finishes him with a kunai through his throat. Itachi watched sadly as the dieing teen glared murderously at him, the life slowly leaving his eyes.

Itachi was about to give a prayer for his friend when waves of power coursed through him. His eyes started to tingle, and then they changed into the final stage of the Sharingan eye.

He may not have understood the entire situation before, but he knew what would happen to him now. He killed an Uchiha. He couldn't deny it; his eyes proved that he killed him. He would have to leave as a missing-nin or face execution.

He quickly rushed into the main building and took the scrolls that contained all the secrets of the Uchiha. He found a trap door by the scrolls as well. Thinking it was a way out, he opened it. Inside was about a square meter wide and deep, the walls were slabs of stone, and at the bottom was a scroll.

(tap) (tap) (tap)

The scroll was a meter long and 10 centimeters thick. It was black with a blood red seal keeping it closed. The seal labeled the scroll as unidentified. Curious, he took the scroll and strapped it to his back.

He was about to open the screen door, when he heard voices:

"Damn that Itachi, acting as a prodigy, only to learn out techniques, then betrays us now."

"Keep a sharp look out for Itachi; if we work together we can finish him."

"Why, my son, why?"

The last made his heart sink, _Mother…_ Everything he did was for his mom. He didn't care about the village at all anymore. They lost his respect with the things they did to Naruto. A pit began to form in his stomach. He waited tell they were gone before silently taking off towards the exit.

He was almost there when a shadow dropped in front of him. He tried to see the man's face, but the fire behind the man made it unclear. The man stepped forward. He saw the man had black hair, and it was in the same style as his. He also saw the Uchiha symbol on the man's chest. Thinking the man is after him, he prepared for a jutsu.

The man stepped forward again, giving slight facial details. Itachi gathered chakra. He stepped again, revealing his face. Upon seeing it, Itachi gasped and lost control over his chakra. The face, with a grin of pure insanity, was his.

(tap) (tap) (tap)

Naruto was having the time of his life, Masa's wife, Sayuri, made onigiri. (3) Also, Masa taught him how to play go, and they were currently playing. Masa planned out every move and counter move, while Naruto gave an aggressive assault, causing unpredictable moves which made Masa have to rethink strategies.

Masa was surprised and annoyed how every time he formed the perfect strategy to stop Naruto, Naruto would find the only flaw and take advantage of it. The worst part was that Naruto did it all unintentionally.

Naruto was having the time of his life. He loved watching Masa get this smug look when he moved a piece, only to have the look removed by him moving a single piece, and the same thing happened every time. _Let's see here… I could move that there, but his piece over there would get it eventually, so the only save piece to move would be to move this… here._

Naruto looked up and grinned as he saw the smug look fall again. Masa sighed and stood up, "Naruto-kun, I haven't lost in this game in over 9 years, and the only one to come close to beating me was this Shikamaru kid. And you just beat me without a strategy… You are a genius!"

Naruto looked at the man in shock; he just beat a master in his own game. Suddenly his face broke into a grin and he danced around singing about how awesome he was at that game.

(tap) (tap) (tap)

The man was apparently waiting for Itachi to lose that control, for when he lost the control, the man did hand seals at a rapid pace. Itachi recovered from his shock right when the man finished. He was to far away to hear what the jutsu was called, but suddenly snakes shot out of the ground and bit his legs. Itachi began the hand seals that removed poison when they suddenly got heavy and he was forced to drop them to his sides. _Paralyzing venom… who is he?_ Itachi knew he couldn't defeat this man now. A brief lose of control lost the fight.

The man walked up to Itachi, the insane grin never leaving his face. He brought his face down to Itachi's ear and whispered, "Experience the pain of having your family killed, and having all of there last thought about how they were betrayed by you. I will leave one other alive, and this other will spend the rest of his life trying to get strong enough to kill you, until he runs to me for power and I will give it to him at the cost of his soul. I think Sasuke will be just fine."

Itachi growled at the man, he killed his family and framed him, and now he was going to corrupt his brother's future. The man did the seals for a teleportation spell and sent them to a bush by the north gate. The Itachi-clone smirked and did the seals again, vanishing in a swirl of leaves. _To go kill the rest of the Uchiha's,_ Itachi mused. He got up and did one more thing before leaving the village.

(tap) (thud) (thud) (thud)

Naruto and Masa looked up at the door. Sayuri answered it, but was suddenly thrown away as 5 ANBU charged in. Working on instincts, Naruto zoomed into a closet where he could peek out of.

The captain spoke, "Counselor Masa-sama, I understand that you have the fugitive Kyuubi No Youkai here?"

"Nine-tailed phantom? I'm sorry but there is no nine-tailed phantom here," replied Masa calmly. Naruto listened to the conversation carefully; Kyuubi No Youkai was still alive? Didn't the 4th kill it?

"The kid who Sarutobi claims to have the Kyuubi sealed inside of. The one who is hated by all because he is the reincarnated Kyuubi," the captain clarified, beginning to get annoyed.

"There is no reincarnated Kyuubi in my house," Masa again replied calmly. Naruto was soaking up all of this information: Hokage-jiisan claims Kyuubi was sealed? Why didn't he tell him? Others hate the kid and think he is the reincarnated Kyuubi? Who's the kid?

An ANBU who believes that Naruto is innocent speaks, "the boy by the name of Uzumaki Naruto, in which was appointed as the hero of Konoha for becoming a vessel of the Kyuubi, is being charged for 'corrupting' his sensei, Uchiha Itachi, into killing the Uchiha clan."

That stuck 2 hard blows in Naruto's mind- HE was the Kyuubi vessel and Itachi killed his family. He unconsciously increased his pressure on the door, until he was broken out of his thoughts by the door shattering.

The ANBU all looked at where the door shattered. In there, was Naruto with a look of pure shock on his face. Masa turned to the ANBU, "you morons! You just broke the 3rd's law!"

The ANBU captain shook his head at the scene and turned back to the counselor, "Well then, we just have to make sure that no one finds out. Masa-sama, you are sentenced for immediate execution for treason against Konoha." He pulled out a kunai and jammed it through Masa's skull before he could reply.

Naruto stared in shock as one of the only people who accepted him for who he was, was killed in cold blood. A gasp was heard behind them and they saw Sayuri staring at her former husband, tears were leaking from her eyes. The captain spoke again, "Aino Sayuri, for attempting to hide a wanted man, you are hereby sentenced to immediate execution." Before the next tear hit the ground, her throat was slit, and she fell to the ground in a bloody heap.

Naruto's eyes took an emotionless look to them. He spoke in his mind, _give me your chakra you unwanted hell spawn._ Kyuubi stared in shock as her container spoke to her for the first time, with such kind words as well. She wordlessly gave him half a tails' worth of chakra.

The ANBU breathed a sigh of relief when they realized that they wouldn't get punished for braking the 3rd's law, but sucked it back in when they felt an enormous amounts of killing intent being directed at them as well as the unbelievable chakra they felt. They haven't felt that much chakra sense the Kyuubi attacked. Kyuubi… they all looked to were Naruto was. Naruto's once sapphire blue eyes where now blood red with a slit in it, his mouth was in an animalistic snarl, he was surrounded in red chakra that burned every thing it touched, and he was walking towards them with a pair of claws.

There screams were heard throughout Konoha…

(tap) (tap) (tap)

That was all Naruto heard as he stared at the small white envelope on his desk. He knew what it was; he knew that Itachi would always tell him if they wouldn't be training that day. He gave a humorless laugh as he picked it up. Tears swelled up in his eyes as he read:

_Dear Naruto-san,_

_I regret to inform you that I shall not be your sensei anymore. I have been framed by an unknown man using a hedge. On my return trip I was attacked by Ryoga, and was forced to kill him. I now have the final stage of the sharingan, so I can't plea my innocence. The man told me he would leave my younger bother alive so that I would be killed by my own family. I ask that you don't let revenge overcome Sasuke. I found an organization that takes missing-nins, and I plane on becoming a spy there. I'll be sending you information about just incase they want to attack Konoha you will have time to escape. A man named Kisame, from the hidden mist seems to be doing the same thing. I'm going to look into him. I also want to tell you that you have always seemed like another little brother to me. Grow strong, we will meet again._

_-Uchiha Itachi, Missing-nin of Konoha_

Tears poured freely from Naruto's eyes. The only people who cared for him were now taken away, falsely accused. His tears suddenly stopped, a pit of fury, sorrow, and ice filled his stomach. He made a promise; he will not let another loved one be falsely accused. To always remember the promise, he took a kunai and used the blade to cut into his skin, forming a deep cut. He snorted in displeasure when he saw red chakra starting to heal it. He jammed the edge into his arm until it was dug half way in his skin. In the morning, he would see that it left a scar in the shape of an eye with a slit in the middle.

He was all alone now he realized. No one left cared. No one knows his pain. No one will be with him tell the end. (4) Wait, there is one. And no matter how much they hate each other, they're stuck together.

He gathered chakra into his stomach, in which the seal appeared, he then focused more chakra into the seal, and pictured a sealed up fox. He closed his eyes to concentrate, when he felt dampness in his pants. _I think I concentrated a little too much…_ He looked down and saw that indeed, he wet his pants, around the time he fell into the sewer. Wait… he fell into a sewer? A quick glance around showed that he was in a giant metal room. The wall on his left was only metal, in front of him the wall had a door, the one on his right was like the one on his left, and the one behind him ha-

"**Who dares interrupt my sleep? Speak now before you face the wrath of Kyuubi No Youk- WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" **Kyuubi was, for the first time in over 3,542 years, shocked- stunned beyond her 10,000 years of wisdom. Her container ignored her 'I'm all high and mighty' talk and walked right into her cage. She sensed no fear in him. Just fury, misery, and pain.

She was shocked once again when he laid down on her paw, using her knuckle as a furry pillow, said, "shut up and go to sleep fur ball," and fell asleep. Kyuubi smiled at the boy, he has been alone for 6 years in his life, had only a single friend for the last year, withstood all the glares, mobs, and beatings, had his a friend leave under false charges, had to see 2 friends be murdered for doing good, had his first 5 kills, and back-talked to Kyuubi, all the while keeping 100 percent sanity. She smile and went to sleep herself, leaning her head against Naruto's body. She could start to like him. Maybe she would train him too.

That night, Naruto gave his only smile for the next 6 years.

(tap) (tap) (silence)

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(1) This will not be a Ranma ½ crossover.

(2) Sound familiar?

(3) Japanese for rice balls.

(4) I don't know when he becomes friends with the Hokage, so I'm letting them only have a 'hey Hokage-jiisan' 'Hey Naruto-kun' friends ship until he's 13.

Churro (chupacabra): Great chapter!

Sub-Zero879: You ruined it.

Churro: What do you mean I ruined it? You made it all happy, nobody likes pure happy stories.

Sub-Zero879: It wasn't all happy! You make it all depressing!

Churro: In the original you made Itachi DIE!

Sub-Zero879: I did?

Churro: "I cannot live with out you Romeo!" (stab) Sound familiar?

Sub-Zero879: Romeo? I thought it was Ryoga?

Churro: … Oops… wrong story?

Sub-Zero879: Anyway… report grammar errors. There will be OOC characters ex. Cold Naruto, Itachi has emotions, Kyuubi can love, Churro dies, Sakura-bashi-

Churro: I die! I'm not part of the story!

Sub-Zero: I'll kill you anyway.

Review!

Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake Omake!

The captain spoke, "Counselor Masa-sama, I understand that you have the fugitive Kyuubi No Youkai here?"

Masa stared blankly before breaking into smiles, "Of course! About time someone took this demon brat away from me! In that closet, he's hiding. Give him an extra whipping from me!"

"Will do Masa-sama," replied the captain as he dragged the crying boy to his doom.

(tap) (whack) (whack) (whack)

"Why you crying? I barely touched you," the captain muttered to the crying boy who had blood gushing down his back from whip marks.

Omake 2

She was shocked once again when he laid down on her paw, using her knuckle as a furry pillow, said, "shut up and go to sleep fur ball," and fell asleep. Kyuubi smiled, free food! And chowed down on a mortal special.


	2. Unfortunate Events

**Intelligo**: thanks for the review. Sorry, the 'tap' 'thud' 'crack' were sound effects. I normally use the little star above the 8 to show that, but the little stars, numbers in authors note, and percentage signs didn't show up when I transferred it to Which is why you got the 'Itachi was 100 sure that…' thing. Also, I'm one of the few authors that go back to fix their stories, so now, the sound effects are in quotes, I actually spelt out the percentage sign, and I got the numbers to work in the A/N.

**Underdark Ranger**: Thank you for reviewing, but I didn't completely understand it. You're making a story where Naruto is just a shell for Kyuubi, robotic in a way. And if he 'touched' Kyuubi, it would be like downloading memories? Then you want someone with a Gaara personality. Should that person be a girl, since your example is Tenten? I'm just going to go with that for now. Now, I hate Sakura and Hinata, and I don't care much for Tenten, Ino, or Temari. I am a fan of Tayuya, Anko, Kurenai, Female Haku, Tsunade, Hana, and Female Kyuubi. You could choose any of those, but if you want someone from the younger age group I'll go with Temari.

**Request-** to those that work on this sight, please allow a new filter for the stories. Have it separate the yaoi/shounen ai and yuri/shoujo ai from normal stories. This allows people to find the story they like faster. I also found out that 50 percent of the Naruto stories are yaoi/shounen ai. There are many guys like me who greatly dislike that kind of story. When I look for a story, I find this: yaoi, sasusaku, yaoi, yaoi, narusaku, sasusaku, yaoi, naruhina, yaoi, and... SasuIta, and that's just sick. Also, Boy/Boy or Girl/Girl things are against my religion. I would greatly appreciate it if you created this filter.

**Disclaimer**- I get sued if I don't write one? Well, let's see what you would get if you sued me... nothing in my left pocket... in my right I have a... PEN! I have a pen! Go me, go me, I have a pen, EAT THAT!

Churro: So that's where my pen went.

Sub-Zero879: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

On with the story…**

* * *

Ice That Fuels Fire**

Chapter 2: When things just don't go your way…

* * *

Slowly, 12 year old Naruto opened his eyes. A glance at his internal clock told him it was 35 minutes till sun-rise. Something was wrong. Due to his training from Kyuubi, he always awoke at sun-rise. Sending his senses out, he felt a chakra signature approaching. Using Kyuubi's training, he sensed that the owner was nervous. _An assassin._ He heard footsteps, informing him that it is a villager.

He waited for the villager to come within striking range. Using his senses, he noticed that the man stopped three feet away from him. He heard the man take a deep breath- most likely to steady himself. Then he noticed that something was off. The breath was really shaky on the exhale, signifying that he was really nervous, for what though? Most people show that they're happy to get rid of the demon. _Either this guy knows it won't work and that I'll kill him or he's… KUSO!_

Naruto burst open his eyes to find his assumption correct. A man, wearing a checkered shirt, was holding a large vial that most likely held 2 liters. Inside the vial was a dark liquid. The man had his eyes closed and seemed to be saying something, "may my death not be in vain, and may the demon return to hell." He opened his eyes and smashed the vial with his free hand.

Naruto acted on instinct as he rolled to the side. Unfortunately, the side he rolled to was where the wall was, leaving his back open to the acid. He felt a small weight land on him before a burning pain flared among his back. He heard a sizzling noise as the acid burned through the flesh and a scream of pain. He turned his head to the side to see the man clawing his face with a decaying hand. Before Naruto's thoughts could progress, an even greater amount of pain jolted through his body. He could feel it, the muscles burning off. Only his pride and stubbornness stopped him from crying out in pain.

A glance back at the man showed that he was doing worse. The man's right cheek was a jagged hole, most likely from the acid. Through the hole he could see that the tongue was suffering from bad burns. His ear was also damaged, with the bottom part missing. Naruto glanced to the other cheek, but the burns in his back flared and his vision blurred. Eventually, his vision cleared and he was able to see that the left cheek had deep scratch marks, with one that went through the cheek. Also, a piece of the nose has torn off, revealing cartilage.

The acid sank deeper, burning bone. Naruto noticed the acid was slowing down, when he noticed something wrong, really, really wrong. The man wasn't wearing a checkered shirt; he was wearing a suit of explosion notes. As if on queue, they burned up. Due to the acid, he didn't have the energy to bring his arms up to protect his chest. The blinding light was his only warning before unbearable pain scorched his flesh.

The explosion lasted longer than he thought it would, and he was forced to take a breath. Almost instantly flames shot into his mouth, evaporating saliva, shot down the esophagus, burning mucus and flesh along the way, the flames filled his lungs, and he felt the left one become burned beyond human repair. Fortunately the red chakra blocked the flames from entering his right lung.

Eventually the flames died down, and he was able to breathe again. His first breath filled his good lung of smoke from the scorched flash. His next breath was no better as his adrenalin slowed down, and he felt excruciating pain exploding through his upper back and chest.

He did a scan of the room to assess the damage. His entire left side was a gut wrenching black and red mess. His body seamed to still be numb. His bed was no more, leaving him on the still burning floor in the middle of a square shape. There were also some holes on the wall and floor that he guessed was from the acid. His dresser was black and still had a small flame burning on it. His ceiling had a hole above him, allowing him to see the golden colors shining around the sky. He heard a small kitten-like yawn, before slipping into unconsciousness, due to pain and shock.

_Mindscape..._

Kyuubi was preparing for another day: wake up, yell at her kit, complain about how it's hard to keep fixing the damage done to his body from ramen, yell for taking too long, train her kit, lunch, train, dinner/rest, and train more before going to sleep. When she woke up, she noticed something… off. When Naruto accepted her as a teacher, he changed the cage to a meadow with a waterfall and river nearby. He also added special features such as wind and common noises. But today it was different. The sky had a crimson hue, the winds were howling, the river had a violent current, and the meadow had some dead grass.

She yawned and blinked a few times, trying to see if she was imagining it, when in a flash of black flames, Naruto appeared. Kyuubi got worried when he didn't move. Also, he hasn't been in the seal since his last birthday. She started searching through his memories, to find out what happened. After viewing them, her blood boiled. A new assassin had come, and this one caused a lot of damage to his body. She felt sad that they made a deal where she can't give him any more than a 3 year olds chakra so that they wouldn't gather the attention of others. She once again got angry at herself for attacking Konoha; enabling her to become the source of Naruto's problems. This wouldn't have happened if she didn't attack.

She smiled in pride when she noticed Naruto's reflexes, how he didn't cry out in pain, and how long he withstood unconsciousness. Again, she got _that_ feeling. She wondered what it was. Ignoring it for the time being, she got back to the more important things.

Naruto pealed himself off the ground. He looked up to see if Kyuubi was OK, and found her smiling. He saw that she was looking in The Pond. The Pond was a small pond that allowed them to see his memories or current actions. He placed that here so Kyuubi could always see how his progress was in training. Also, this is how she is able to communicate with him. Unfortunately, she could send mental images with it as well. Living up to her name 'Queen of Torture,' she would send him pictures of different ways to relax… involving women. _Perverted little demon… AND WHY IS HE STILL SMILING?_ Now Naruto may not be dense, but with Kyuubi's deep voice and how she insisted that she was a guy, he has been led to believe that she was a he.

Kyuubi looked up from The Pond to check on her kit. He was standing up and glaring at her. She quickly dropped her smile and hoped he wouldn't mention it. She grinned and spoke, "**That… was pathetic. I bet that even the 2 tail's container would have done better than you."**

Naruto snarled at her, "what do you mean that was pathetic! I didn't see you giving out any tips! I take the damage while you sleep, and you call me pathetic?"

Kyuubi raised an eyebrow, "**I thought that you would have had enough common sense to try to roll where there isn't a wall. Also, you waited for him to come to you. I would have never made either mistake."_ Now, how will you respond to that?_ **This has always been a game to Kyuubi; to get under someone's skin till they snap. She's had the most fun with Naruto since he seamed to say the right things to get under her… fur. But today was not the case,

"Don't give me that! YOU'RE the one who told me to kill them when they least expect it, YOU'RE the one how slept instead of helping, and YOU'RE the one who hasn't taught me how to counter fire or poison!" Naruto was getting pissed, he goes through all that and Kyuubi blames it all on him?

"**I haven't taught you how to counter the elements because with your Chakra control, you would end up not getting better or you would freeze/poison yourself."**

"It's your fault my Chakra control is like that," Naruto was beginning to control his emotions again. The last time he had an outburst like that was when a letter from Itachi informed him that the man who framed him was Orochimaru. Speaking of Itachi, he searched The Pond for something. Once he found it he cursed. An unread letter from Itachi was burned in the fire. He hoped with all his heart that there was nothing important since he couldn't read it.

What the letter read:

_Dear Naruto-san,_

_Something has come up in the Akatsuki. We were ordered to bring all of the tailed demons, container or not. I volunteered to get Kyuubi of course, so look out for Kisame and I. Also, I have to keep up my act as a missing-nin, so when we see each other, I will attack you. You need to fight back with your all, ok? See you soon, stay safe._

_-Uchiha, Itachi, Konoha Nuke-nin_

_PS. Remember not to give off too much Chakra because Samehada will devour it._

At the bottom of the letter was a giant, jagged sword with rays of sunlight shining around it, it also had people bowing to the sword. If Naruto saw the drawing, he would have guessed that Kisame drew it, but he did not see it, for it was now ashes due to the explosion.

Naruto sighed as he gazed at the unopened envelope. He would be healed and ready to go by tomorrow, he hoped. He stood up from his sitting position and approached the unusually quite Kyuubi. "Teach me a new Jutsu since my body is unusable today," Naruto demanded. Kyuubi wordless nodded and began to teach him a Jutsu that required almost no Chakra control.

After training and mentally exhausting himself, he actually 'slept.'

_Dream..._

_Darkness everywhere, only broken by red eyes. They all glared murderously at him. It was like demons from hell watching him, but instead of pupils with slits, they had 3 commas. The darkness faded, revealing a 6 year old Naruto. He was inside a courtyard. Surrounding him was a large group of people._

_They all had a fan shape on their backs. They also had red eyes with 3 commas for pupils, symbolizing them as Uchiha. They shouted things like, "go to hell demon!", "You've killed too many Uchiha!", and "It's time to send you back to where you came from!" They started attacking the young Naruto._

_Naruto tried to cover his face, but some kicks got through. One kick slammed into his temple, forcing him to abandon his guard to cover the wound. Soon more kicks hit his face. Cheek, nose, chin, other temple, nothing was safe from this assault. They hit his ribs and stomach as well. He heard soft approaching footsteps. Was it help? He grimaced as he tried to see who it was, pain flaring from the abused muscles. He saw a young boy, around his age, that had a look of curiosity on his face. The attack stopped briefly as they took notice of the newcomer._

"_What are you doing?" asked young Uchiha Sasuke, glancing at each member of the group._

_The man closest to him answered, "This demon, Sasuke," he kicked Naruto, "has killed more Uchiha than anyone else in Konoha history." They stayed silent as Sasuke stared at Naruto. Sasuke shrugged before walking back into the complex._

_They glanced at each other before looking back at Naruto. They quickly began where they left off, beating the sin out of the demon. After a minute passed, Naruto heard a screen open. He heard a slight gasp before a rush of air hit him and the blows stopped. He painful lifted his head to see what happened, and saw that everyone was knocked out, and a tall man was offering his hand to help him up._

_Naruto shakily raised his hand to accept the help. He took in the savior's look, his hair was black in a pony tail and he wore a black shirt that contained the Uchiha crest on it. Before he could take in any more details, he lost consciousness, with his last sight of caring blood red eyes with 3 black commas._

The next day…

When Naruto awoke, he ignored the memory. He decided to test how close he was to being fully healed: his lung burned like hell and his upper back had a throbbing pain. He decided he would live and attempted to get up. Nothing happened. He was worried since only his shoulders and neck reacted from his efforts. He tried again, but got the same results.

He studied his left hand and attempted to move it. Nothing happened. He glared at the pinky and tried to move that. Again, nothing happened. He decided to check what was wrong, _Kyuubi..._ No answer, just some snoring. _Kyuubi, I have a question._ He heard a snort, followed by an even louder snore. He grew a vein on his head and yelled, _WAKE UP FURBALL, I HAVE A QUESTION!_

He heard a yawn that was followed by a sleepy, **I didn't do it! Huh, oh it's just you.** Naruto grew a sweat-drop at the outburst.

He decided to break the uncomfortable silence that was beginning, _why can't I move any of my body below my shoulders?_

**Let me see... your legs and arms are functioning properly... a slightly fried nerve in your fingers will make them hard to bend, but other than that you should be... KUSO!** He (she) found the problem, he mused. He waited for her to explain. He wasn't disappointed, **Kit, you know how the acid got down to your spine?** Without waiting for an answer, she continued, **it got through the divisions in the bone, dissolving a great deal of your spinal cord. You are now paralyzed from everything beneath your shoulders.**

Naruto starred blankly at his ceiling. After a few more seconds of silence, he asked, _how long will it take to heal?_ He grew slightly worried when the Kyuubi didn't answer right away.

After what felt like hours, she spoke, **well, normally it would take around 3 months with my healing powers, but... with that damaged lung and the recovery of all the other nerves that were destroyed from the explosion, it will take around 5 months.** She felt depression leak through the link, so she tried again with an old idea, **let's not forget that we could instantly heal it if you-**

_Iie, if you gave that amount of chakra to me, every shin-obi in Konoha would feel it. They would then attack me claiming that I was attempting do finish off the village. Also, that much chakra forced into me would leave me exhausted, putting me into an ever worse position that would leave me defenseless._ It made sense, having every ninja in a village would be hard to fight off when you were so exhausted that you couldn't even lift a kunai.

Still, she had to try, **but aren't you defenseless now? You will be defenseless for 5 months this way, giving enough time for more assassins to come. The Hokage only comes once a year, and that's on your birthday, in 7 months. Just enough time to finish you off.**

Naruto appeared to be considering it with his silence. She waited patiently for him to speak, _that is true, but with that last attack, they will most likely think that the flame was from me. That will make them think twice about coming here- thinking that I have regained control over fire. The screams also might have scarred them. But you are right; I can guarantee that at least one will come within that 5 months time. If, no, when they do, I always wanted to try techniques without seals, this could be my first lesson._

Kyuubi almost sounded worried when she spoke, **Kit, you are not ready for that, doing Jutsu without seals requires chakra control that only the Kage, maybe Sannin, have. One mistake would utterly destroy your tenketsu, taking years to heal. Also, if they become destroyed, I can't give you chakra until it's healed. If that were to happen, you WILL die.**

Naruto remained calm and emotionless when he answered, _then I die._ Kyuubi's eyes widened slightly at that. As much as she wanted to get out, she would never allow her kit to get hurt if that was the cost. Of course, she would never tell him that. He suddenly spoke again with a carefree tone, slightly surprising her, _and if worse comes to worse, I'll just use your chakra instead._ This relieved her somewhat, but not enough to shake off the bad feeling she had in her gut.

They had a long time to wait, so she decided to finish teaching him the newest technique.

_Three months later..._

Not much happened within the last 3 months. They trained inside his mind for awhile; she also taught him some chakra control exercises. They have been safe from any assassinations, but that was soon to change.

It recently rained, leaving the still unmoving Naruto smelling fresh and clean... ok, maybe not like that, but he didn't smell bad. His room looked almost unchanged from the attempt all those months ago, with just the weather damage showing since the walls were burned down, leaving it open for howling winds, rain, and ect.

It was currently night, but for some strange reason, a corner of the room, open to the moon light, was completely black with shadows. After a few seconds, that shadow started to change shape, revealing a person. Although the person was wearing an outfit that covered the details of its wearers, anyone was able to tell that the trespasser was female.

She wore a black, baggy outfit that appeared to be skin tight on the wrist and ankles. She wore black gloves and a mask that covers her face from the nose down (think Kakashi). Her hair looked to be brown, and she had dark green eyes that held a predatory gleam in them. She eyed the bed: the blankets were burned and bloody, Naruto's breath was ragged, and his clothes were barely keeping this story rated T. Her suspicions were correct, the demon was injured.

_Mindscape..._

Said demon was currently resting after mastering tree climbing. It took him around 3 weeks to do it, but he got it down. Kyuubi was behind him, carrying one of the world's biggest fears, a predatory grin. She crept down to The Pond and went through his memory for something. After a few minutes of searching, she growled in frustration. Suddenly, another idea came into mind. He wouldn't know it was her, so no harm done. She sent a mental movie of her human form into the pond. (1)

Naruto was about to get up to inform Kyuubi that he was ready for the next lesson, when an image appeared in his mind. The image was of a woman; she had straight, flaming red hair that went down to the middle of her back, she had red eyes that had a slit in them, and a gorgeous face in his opinion. She had 2 little fox ears on top of here head, and whisker marks like his. The image continued down word. She had breast that were larger than most of the girls he seen, but not by too much to make her look bad. Under that, she had a flat stomach and an hourglass figure. Her hips weren't too wide, and her legs had nice creamy look to them. All in all, this lady had the body of a goddess in his opinion (ironic isn't it).

Suddenly, the image started to poses for him. She did a cute pout and a pose that would give Sarutobi a nosebleed, and then said, "Relax Naru-kun." Naruto barely had enough time to say kuso before she started showing more of herself (I'm keeping this rated T). Kyuubi grinned when she saw the starting a nosebleed.

_In the real world..._

The assassin paused when she noticed that the demon was gritting his teeth, struggling with something. Suddenly, a jet of blood shot out of his nose and he crashed through the wall behind the bed. She almost screamed when she noticed that some of it got in her hair. She took a kunai out of her pouch and began to advance on the soon to be dead demon.

_Mindscape..._

In Naruto's mind, there was another soon to be dead demon. Naruto was growling as he charged the laughing Kyuubi. When he was just one meter away, he stopped, and judging by Kyuubi's now serious face, she felt it too. He quickly transferred back to the real world, and he noticed someone was there with a kunai in their hand. He sighed. Naruto was hoping that he didn't have to do any techniques.

He began to gather chakra when he heard Kyuubi shout in his head, **you don't have good enough chakra control yet! If you do that now you WILL DIE!** Naruto gave an emotionless shrug as he continued to gather chakra. Kyuubi starred in silent shock. She knew he didn't care if he lived or died, but purposely killing himself was not something she expected.

The assassin began to hurry when she noticed that the demon was gathering chakra. She began to bring her kunai down for the killing strike when she noticed something off. All the chakra the demon gathered seemed to have vanished. She instantly thought that the demon was giving up and brought the kunai down with confidence. What she didn't expect was a hand to shoot up and grab her wrist. On the attacks hand was a scar in the shape of an eye with a slit in it.

She then noticed that the ragged breathing of the demon seemed to be more labored. She glanced at him and saw that the offending hand belonged to him. Her eyes widened before excruciating pain shot through her arm as the demon broke it. She screamed in pain, and tears began to form in her eyes. She didn't want to die; she was hoping that everyone would call her a hero if she did this. She tried to pull away, but soon found that it was useless. The demon pull her down until her ear was only inches away from his mouth, "you made a big mistake attacking me. I'm not even the demon, just a kid who tends to be the village punching bag, but guess what... I'm not going to be one anymore. You all think I'm the demon, so I'll become one just for you."

She tried to get away again while holding in her sobs. She felt the grip slacken and turned to make a break for it. She froze in fear when she heard him speak, "never turn you back on an enemy." She quickly tried to turn, but a hand shot through her chest. She looked down with terrified eyes at the hand that was sticking out through her body. She quickly lost consciousness, and he tied her up from the shoulders to the elbow and the ankles.

Naruto snorted at the pathetic display of the assassination. He made sure he didn't hit any vital points when piercing her chest and he used chakra to seal up the skin. She would be perfect for torturing to keep away any assassin that might come. He grew a sudden massive headache which was followed by a lot of yelling, **why didn't you tell me that you were healed? All this time I have been wasting chakra that could have gotten you healed sooner!**

Naruto snorted, _actually you wouldn't. I took most of your healing chakra to fix my spinal cord. So now my regular nerves are functioning properly, and my spinal cord is mostly fixed. My lung has had no healing to it._

There was a comfortable silence, only broken by Naruto's ragged breathing. Suddenly, a thought popped into Kyuubi's mind, **you said that your spinal cord was _mostly_ fixed. I know that if it was damaged in the slightest, you would be paralyzed. How were you able to move?**

_You noticed my slip? Fine, I'll explain; you see, I used my chakra to create an artificial organ, and since it was made of my chakra, it was only temporary. Now if I used your chakra, it would be permanent, but that would be bad because this wouldn't be able to heal regularly and it would stay that way,_ Naruto explained.

Kyuubi accepted Naruto's explanation and stayed silent. Naruto decided to sleep since training that day was pretty much over.

_Dream..._

_Naruto and the stranger were in the Hokage Tower, waiting to talk to the Hokage. After a few minutes of waiting, the secretary allowed them in. Naruto sat down in the provided chair, while the stranger stood behind him. The stranger spoke, "Hokage-sama, I am here to report an attack on Uzumiki Naruto, which was done by the Uchiha clan."_

_Sarutobi gasped slightly at the comment, and looked at the 6 year old Naruto: Naruto's temple had a nasty bruise, while the rest of his face had small, fading ones, also, his clothes were torn at places, revealing cuts and more bruises. He glanced up at the stranger and asked, "Please explain what happened, Itachi-san."_

"_I wasn't there for all of it, but what I was there for was pretty bad. Sasuke came into my room and asked for training, I was going to answer when I heard some noise from outside. I asked Sasuke if he knew what it was, and he said something about an Uchiha killer being tortured. I went outside to investigate and saw Naruto being beat senseless. I quickly knocked the attackers out, and offered help to Naruto. He passed out after seeing my face. I began to bring him here, when he woke up and asked if he could walk on his own. The rest is history," was Itachi's offered story. Sarutobi nodded but stayed silent. Itachi spoke again, "I have a request Hokage-sama: may I train Naruto-san? Just enough to defend himself from any drunken villager or escape some shinobi?"_

_Sarutobi thought about it for a moment, "I believe that is acceptable. As long as you don't go easy in his training, I don't want the hero of Konoha to be some one who just sits around and pulls pranks."_

_Itachi bowed in respect, "of course Hokage-sama. Now, about finding a legal way to remove my name from the Uchiha register?"_

_And thus began the friendship between Naruto and Itachi..._

Naruto awoke at sunrise the next day. Quickly creating the artificial spinal cord, he sat up and gazed coldly at the now whimpering assassin. Her eyes were wide with fear, and tears were steadily leaking from her eyes. He got off the bed and slowly made his way over to her. Her eyes got wider as he approached, and Naruto assumed that if she lived, she would have severe mental trauma. He bent down over her, whispering to her, "It is time to reap what you have sown." His icy blue eyes never leaving her terror filled forest green ones.

He picked the assassin up by the throat and kept his piercing gaze. He pulled out a kunai and slowly pressed it into her arm below the elbow. He pushed harder, causing it to bleed. She didn't cry in pain, _at least she remembered some of her training._ He began to drag the kunai down her arm, leaving a deep gash that was bleeding at a steady rate. He snorted in displeasure when he noticed that her resistance was beginning to fail. He pulled the kunai out of the 10 cm cut and threw her to the ground.

He crouched in front of her and began to interrogate her, "why did you come here?" Seeing that she wasn't going to say anything, he roughly grabbed the hurt arm and began to spread open the cut to a width of 2 cm. She bit her lip to not cry out in pain, but didn't show any signs of answering. He spread the skin wider, and it ripped to a length of 13 cm. He heard her whimper, but that was all.

Realizing that a little cut wasn't going to make her talk, he began more painful things. He jammed the kunai through her gut. Her eyes widened it shock and pain, and she gave a loud scream. He started twisting it and asked the question again. She moaned out, "I wanted to be considered a h-hero." She gave a brief stutter when he jerked the kunai.

His cold voice caused he to shiver slightly, "why would you killing me make you a hero?" He pressed the blade to her leg to emphasize that he wanted the truth.

"B-because my parents w-would a-always talk about how happy they would if s-someone got rid of you," she began to cry. Naruto sighed at how pathetic this Chuunin was. He slashed her leg to shut her up, needless to say, it worked like a charm.

"Now, why would your parents be happy if you killed a child?" Naruto continued in his emotionless voice. She didn't say anything, trying to follow the Sandaime's law. Naruto jammed the kunai through her leg, and again snorted at seeing how easily she cracked. He figured it would be best to kill her here so that other villages wouldn't be able to take any knowledge of Konoha.

"Because y-you're the K-Kyuubi!" She screamed between more tears.

Naruto growled but didn't lose his emotionless voice or look. He picked her up by the throat and lifted her to just inches away from his face, "and what if I told you that I wasn't the Kyuubi? What if I told you that I was just an innocent boy who got beat senseless by everyone?" He paused to let that sink in. Seeing that she didn't believe him, he gave an example, "think of me as a glass of milk. Now tell me, when you pour milk into the cup, does that change the cup into milk?" She gave a hesitant shake of her head, not understanding, "now, after that, you put a lid onto the glass. Now the milk can't leak out. Now you have a full glass OF milk, not just milk. And if you were too stupid to under stand that, think of the glass as me, the milk as Kyuubi, and the lid as the seal that the greatest of all the Hokages placed on me.

"But since you think I'm the demon, you don't trust the Hokage's work. I bet he is very disappointed in you," he saw her eyes widen in understanding, then fill up in grief. Naruto tossed her to the floor after that and checked to see if anyone was coming.

She didn't believe in the Yondaime, she believed her parents and everyone else. She was going to assassinate an innocent kid. Her eyes shed tears of sorrow at that thought. All this time, her family and everyone else have scorn and beat an innocent child. "I'm... so, so sorry," she whispered.

Naruto turned his attention back down to her, "what was that?"

"I'm sorry."

Naruto nodded and sat back down on his bed. He glanced at the assassin and noticed she was bleeding bad and shivering. He gently placed his blanket down over her body. He placed a comforting hand on her back, and grabbed a kunai from his pouch. Without any warning, he jammed it through her heart. She twitched once, and then her body relaxed.

Feeling Kyuubi's confusion over the link, he explained, _she was suffering; emotionally and physically. I allowed her to be at peace._

He searched her body for an identity scroll. Finding one, he searched through it:

_Aino Sasami_

_Age: 16_

_Sex: Onna_

_Eye color: Green_

_Hair: Brown_

_Village: Konoha_

_Rank: Chuunin_

_Details: recently promoted, has a low Chuunin/high Genin chakra level, average taijutsu, and average Genjutsu skills._

_Missions:_

_S: 0_

_A: 0_

_B: 1_

_C: 6_

_D: 27_

He recognized her as Masa's granddaughter and looked up into the heavens, _I wonder: are you smiling or frowning down at me, Masa-jiisan?_

He gently set the body in front of his apartment, and went back to sleep/train.

_Two months later..._

Naruto sighed as he got out of his bed. All his muscles were sore and tight from not being used in months. He also noticed muscle loss from them not being used. He left outside to go train. He briefly gazed where he left Sasami. He gave a brief pray and continued on his way. After a few minutes of traveling, he heard his stomach rumble, thoroughly scarring everyone around him, thinking the Kyuubi returned. He had the decency to blush before continuing to go find some food.

After having ramen, he continued to the training grounds to practice everything he learned while handicapped and to get back into physical shape.

_Two months later..._

A now stronger looking Naruto got out of his bed. Today was his birthday, and he wasn't in the best of moods. Yesterday, Kyuubi trained him on how to resist the attraction of females, to prevent any traps. She also warned him that one of the Sannin would fall to any ambush if a woman showed some skin. Thus, he had a total of 13 nosebleeds that day. The good news was that he found a way to prevent nosebleeds, so if he had any perverted thoughts, no one would know.

Here was his method (this isn't true since in real life no one gets nosebleeds for being a pervert): nosebleeds were caused by a rush of blood to the perverted part of the mind. Since the rush is too great for the veins to handle, the mind seeks a way to quickly get rid of the extra blood, which is through the nose. His way to prevent it was to constantly keep a flow of blood to that part of the mind, by having constant perverted thoughts. He can also slow the flow of blood there in case he sees something REALLY perverted. (2)

He got dressed in a black pants and shirt and went down to Ichiraku (sp?) Ramen, and noticed that someone else was there. Now, the ramen food there was good, but people would never come due to the fact that the 'demon' likes it. Normally, the cook would be upset that he's losing business right? Wrong, in truth, he was gaining business with the fact that when Naruto went there, he had at least 30 bowls. Before Naruto started coming there, he got only around 25 bowls a day.

Naruto, thinking that someone came since he wasn't there for a while, just ignored the person and sat down. "I'll have one of everything, please."

The chief looked up in shock once hearing the voice of his favorite customer. Even Ayame stopped in shock. "N-Naruto, you're back!" The chief stuttered, but the shock soon wore off, and he announced, "One of everything, coming up!"

"I knew I could find you hear on your birthday, Naruto," the stranger spoke.

Naruto glanced at him a half-opened eye, "konichiwa, Jiisan. I take it you're here to check up on me?"

The Hokage smiled, "of course. Anything interesting happen in the last year?"

Naruto turned his attention to the newly arrived ramen, "Itadakimasu. Only 2 assassination attempts. The first put me out of commission for 5 months. Both assassins are dead, by suicide and my hand. Although I killed her to relieve the physical and mental pain." At Sarutobi's questioning gaze, he explained, "I made her understand the difference between demons and children."

The Hokage nodded in understanding, "I see. That explains the death of Sasami and why Kiyoku is missing." The sat in silence for a little while, only broken by the finishing of Naruto's second bowl. Sarutobi broke the pace, "Naruto, I was finally able to get you accepted into the academy, class starts next week, and even though you missed the first 4 years, you are able to graduate this year. And here is a scroll that I found awhile ago, I haven't had time to read it, but it might come in handy sometime."

Naruto nodded and accepted his third bowl and the scroll. Sarutobi got up to leave, but was held back by Naruto, "did you get a letter from _him_ 7 months ago?"

The Hokage sat back down and turned to Naruto, "now that you mention it, I did. On it, _he_ said that you would be able to explain everything. What did yours say?

Naruto sighed, "Kuso... Mine was burnt up in the first assassination attempt. I hope nothing important was in there." Sarutobi silently agreed, and left soon after. After finishing his 33rd bowl, only having to pay for half since it was his birthday, he left to the training grounds.

After about 15 minutes of training, he heard the sound of someone else training nearby, _that's odd. No one is usually here at this time._ He moved to the next clearing and saw someone in the center, kicking a log. The person had his hair in a pigtail, and had the largest eyebrows that he had ever seen (Gai's team just started, so he still has his old look).

Naruto frowned, _I sensed one chakra signature here, and that was in the trees._ He glanced at the tree and saw a man in a skin-tight, green spandex with eyebrows larger than the first person. _So, this kid doesn't have a chakra signature; either he's really good at hiding it or doesn't have chakra._

**I think he doesn't have chakra,** the Kyuubi spoke for the first time that day. **His body seems to break the spiritual and physical energy apart before it is big enough to notice. Also, his body doesn't seem to release the extra spiritual energy. That is causing great strain on his body. Why don't you take that extra spiritual energy and make them into training weights for him.**

Naruto walked into the clearing and helped the kid up after he fell, "you have no chakra."

Lee's eyes widened at that remark, how did he know? He asked, "I know. Do you know of a way to fix that?"

Naruto kept a steady gaze and said, "yes, but if I did, what would your nindo be?"

Lee's eyes widened again, "how did you know my nindo?" Lee cursed himself for letting his dream be clouded by his desire to fit in.

"That... is a secret," Lee face-faulted. "But a have a gift for you." He placed a hand on Lee's leg. A flash of white light later, a white Kanji that said 'SEAL' was there. He repeated it on the thighs, other leg, and arms.

When he stood up, Lee asked, "How do I activate them? And how did you make them?"

Naruto turned around and started walking away, "they are already activated. They will turn blue later, so don't be alarmed. They will release when needed. As for how I made them, it's too complicated to explain. (3)" Lee opened his mouth to ask a question, but Naruto suddenly said, "Name's Naruto by the way." Lee closed his mouth and smiled. He got back to training with renewed energy.

After training, Gai stopped Lee on his way home, "Lee, let me see those seals." Lee brought up his wrist and to both of their amazement, it had a very light blue hue to it. Gai touched it, but recoiled in shock as it burnt his hand. _Chakra burns_, he examined, _but Lee doesn't have chakra..._

**What are you going to say when it turns red?** Kyuubi was interested at the fact that he used that specific seal. The seal absorbs spiritual and physical energy. It was white because Lee had all of that extra spiritual energy that never left his body. As he trains physically, it will absorb that and turn blue, into chakra. If there is too much physical energy in someone's chakra, it turns red and more destructive if used in a Jutsu. If too much spiritually energy is absorbed, then it turns a light blue or green and heals if used in a Jutsu. Once he releases it, the spiritual energy will be released back into the earth and he will absorb all of the stored physical energy, giving him a boost as good as a soldier pill in one month. In a year it would be like 12 pills (4).

_I don't think he will be that advanced anytime soon,_ came Naruto's calm reply. _I don't need to worry about now anyway._ He went to bed after having more ramen and reading the scroll. He appeared in the seal and began to meditate, ignoring Kyuubi's mental images.

On his desk, the scroll was partly opened, revealing the title, "Saotome Final Attack." (5)

_Dream..._

_It's been 2 months since Itachi's first letter, and he finally got another. He slowly opened it. A picture fell out, but he just read the letter_

_Dear Naruto-san,_

_Forgive me for not writing for so long, but I have been busy here in Akatsuki. I was right, Kisame was also kicked out of his country under false assumptions, but it was for a reason he won't tell. He sends letters to a young girl named Akira. There is a picture I've sent of her and Kisame. He treasures her more than his precious sword, Samehada. Also, the unidentified scroll I have, I read part of it. The things I found out... I will tell you later, but know that some of the things aren't meant for anyone to know. Also this Orochimaru guy needs looking into. I will contact you as soon as possible, but only through letter. In other news, I hear that someone told you the truth about Kyuubi. You should understand why I never told you about it. You should try to get training from it. Grow strong, we will meet again._

_-Uchiha, Itachi, Konoha nuke-nin_

_The picture was of a girl and a man. The girl had long, unbound teal hair and ocean blue eyes. She had a pink hat on and was smiling. Behind her was a man. He had a VERY large sword on his shoulder and was doing a thumbs-up sign towards the camera. He had white and blue arm warmers and a hidden mist forehead protector on. He also had grey skin and gills under his eyes. He was giving a shark-like grin towards the camera._

_Next week..._

Naruto took a seat in the back, next to a kid with a dog. On his other side was a pineapple head kid who appeared to be sleeping and a kid who was eating none stop. He leaned back in his chair and went inside the seal. He waited for the role to call and was watching through The Pond with Kyuubi. They made little note here and there about the people and made a list on everyone's name from the role. He kept Shikamaru's name on the top of the list because he wanted to play Go with him sometime.

Iruka's eyes widened once seeing Naruto's name on there. He heard that the council would never allow him to be in the academy. "And finally, Uzumaki Naruto." He looked up when he heard no answer. He saw Naruto leaning back in his chair, asleep. "PAY ATTENTION!" He threw a piece of chalk at Naruto. Naruto caught it and through in back twice as fast, all the while staying asleep. "R-right, now c-class, I welcome y-you to a new y-year."

Naruto stared amused at the teacher from inside the seal. He has no control of his body there, but years of constant assassination attempts caused nice reflexes. He transferred back into his body and decided to talk to his neighbors, "Shikamaru, we're going to play Go after class."

The comment cause Chouji to drop a chip in shock, someone at his age would WANT to play against SHIKAMARU? "How troublesome... Alright, on the roof." Kiba glanced at the duo. He heard that Shikamaru was unbeatable since some old guy died a few years ago. He decided to watch.

"What are you doing back there!" Iruka was getting mad, Naruto sleeps in class and starts talking to everyone, and it's only the first day too.

"Introductions," Naruto's calm voice replied before they could make a useless excuse.

Iruka sighed and went back to teaching the lesson, "since we did ranks last year, we're going to talk about how chakra is formed."

The sound of 2 heads hitting a table rang throughout the class. Naruto and Shikamaru looked up once hearing another head hit a table. They looked at each other a nodded. Iruka found them sleeping a couple of minutes later.

_After class..._

Naruto sighed as he moved another piece to a random spot. He was hoping that Shikamaru would be a greater challenge. Chouji and Kiba both had their eyes wide and mouth open, chips and dog long forgotten. This new guy, Naruto, was OWNING Shikamaru. Shikamaru frowned at seeing that he was losing. He went into his thinking position. Naruto raised an eyebrow at this; maybe he had a trick up his sleeve. Suddenly, he felt another chakra signature land on the roof. The person's stealth was beyond Genin, low Jounin was his guess. He glanced at the person and saw that one of his classmates, Shino, had begun to watch them. _Hmm... Shino has had great training in stealth, it's better than mine, but who trained him? How complicated..._

Shikamaru got out of position and moved a piece. Naruto sighed and moved a piece. Chouji dropped his chips and Kiba dropped Akamaru, earning a growl of annoyance. It was a draw. They stood up, and Shikamaru sighed, "You didn't even have a strategy... How troublesome."

Naruto's face stayed neutral, "actually I did. It was to move randomly; to throw my opponent off guard. It's complicated because I also have to make sure I don't leave any stupid mistakes. I found out your strategy right away; sacrifice the lesser for the greater. Just don't do that in missions, 'those who abandon their comrades are worse than trash' as my sensei once said."

"That's good Naruto, you will make a fine shin-obi one day," a voice came from their left. They turned and saw a man who looked like an older Shikamaru with scars. Next to him was a man who looked like an older Chouji with red hair, who was nodding at his friends words. After some goodbyes Shikato and Chouza took Chouji and Shikamaru home.

After they left, Naruto picked up Akamaru and whispered in his ear, "about 3 houses down from the Inuzuka estate is a 3 year old female wolf. At night time she goes into the woods to hunt. You might want to take a look at her. I hear the likes the small ones." Akamaru barked which translated to alright and jumped on Naruto's shoulder.

Kiba gave a questioning gaze which Naruto answered to with a raised eyebrow. Kiba sighed and asked, "what did he say boy?"

'_None of you business,'_ was Akamaru's response.

Kiba starred open mouthed at him before huffing and walking away with what was left with his pride. Shino came out of his hiding spot and stopped next to him. Kiba noticed and kept walking, but stopped when he ran into a hand. He glanced at Shino, but only saw his hand jerk slightly. He then saw the Naruto was the one who stopped him. Naruto bent down and picked up a bug, "you didn't see her." Shino extended his hand to receive it, but Naruto placed it on Kiba's shoulder. Shino raised an eyebrow, in which Naruto responded with, "It's a female. They give off a scent that only we can smell. It would be good for tracking." (6)

Shino nodded and placed one on Naruto's shoulder, "you seem to know a lot about bugs."

"Only enough to get around. I know a bug collector, and he taught be some things on survival, mainly on how to get bugs to help you. I once had to get some bees' honey. Not a pleasant experience," Naruto and Shino shivered slightly. Even Shino wouldn't try something like that.

After a few minutes of silence, a girl that smelt of dog appeared. She took Kiba home, so only Naruto and Shino were left. They starred at each other in silence. A leaf hit the ground and they poofed out of existence. Shino appeared in front of the school. As he walked home he smiled to himself. Anyone who likes bugs is a friend of his.

About halfway home Kiba stopped, he turned around and looked towards the school. Hana glanced at him; he shook his head and continued home.

Both Shikamaru and Chouji were starring at the clouds, thinking about a new friend of theirs.

That day, a friendship was formed between the 5 of them, with Shino more or less just watching them.

Naruto sat down at his dinner table, in front of him a book. The title was For Men: the Shin-obi Life. The cover showed 2 shuriken clashing. There were little boxes that said 'Rankings' 'Villages' and 'Throwing Techniques.' Innocent enough right? But on the inside was a story that rivals Icha Icha Paradise in pervertedness (not a word).

He went to bed and into the seal. He saw Kyuubi waiting for him. He sat down in a meditating position and said, "Kiba's sister looked pretty good."

Kyuubi huffed, "**are you kidding? She reeks of dog, and I bet she eats like an animal.**"

Naruto raised an eyebrow, "and this is coming from someone who eats their food alive. I also said she looked good, nothing about smell or eating habits. Besides, aren't you the one who keeps saying that I need to 'relax' with women?" Kyuubi stuttered out something in which Naruto replied by, "and you sound a little jealous, you're not gay are you?"

Kyuubi blushed a deep shade of red, which was noticeable through her fur. He may not have mentioned it in that way, but it didn't stop her from having thoughts about a certain dog-girl named Hana. Naruto raised an eyebrow when he saw that Kyuubi started to drool. Then he noticed her blush and decided that he didn't want to know.

_Dream..._

_The third letter from Itachi,_

_Dear Naruto-san,_

_I was betrayed! The bastard Orochimaru was the one who killed the Uchiha clan. If you ever see him, kill him as fast as you can, but be careful, he's almost as strong as me. Our leader is talking about the demons out there, so I can't leave to pursue him. You may need to be careful out there, something's going on her and I don't like it. I found out the reason why Itachi left the Wave country, but you're going to need to ask him yourself, it's sad and I respect his privacy. I told him about you though. He would like to meet you. I would like it if you went to check up on Sasuke soon._

_Uchiha, Itachi, Konoha nuke-nin_

It was midday on the 3rd week of the academy, and Naruto went to check up on Lee. He found him at the same spot. He jumped onto the log and sat down. Lee stopped on his 1,500th kick. He wiped his (utterly gigantic, unearthly, scary, demented, mountainous) brows with his sleeve and looked up, "Konichiwa, Naruto-kun."

"Good day to you too, Lee-san, I came to check up on the seals. Lee lifted up his arm and Naruto almost gasped, it was a deep blue, starting to turn purple. _Just how much does he train?_ Naruto shook his head, "you're moving faster than expected, so I need to change the seals." Lee nodded, and watched as the lines in the Kanji doubled in width and turned green. Naruto turned and left, but not before saying, "nice pig-tail by the way, if you would just trim the eyebrows, chicks would dig you."

Once he was out of the clearing, he was stopped by Gai, "NARUTO-KUN, THE FLAMES OF YOUTH BURN BRIGHTLY IN YOU!" after hearing Naruto complain about his ears, he continued in a lower voice, "I saw those seals you put on Lee, what are they?"

Naruto, deciding to speak at Gai's level, said, "It would be unyouthful to give my secrets away to a man I barely know."

Gai popped back into his youthful mode and shouted, "YOU ARE RIGHT! FOR MY MISTAKE I SHALL RUN 500 LAPS AROUND KONOHA!" He began to turn, but was held back at the shout of his student. He rushed back into the clearing and saw Lee on the ground starring at his hand. He asked what happened.

Upon hearing his teacher's voice, Lee looked at him, "S-sensei, I got a cut, and it instantly healed! Here watch," and before Gai could do anything, Lee cut his wrist with a kunai, but, to his amazement, it healed within a couple of seconds. Gai shook his head.

Naruto walked into the Uchiha estate. He glanced at different places, comparing it to the last time he was here. He continued over to Sasuke's house. The screen opened right as he got there, revealing Sasuke dressed in all black. Sasuke opened his mouth in shock, what was he doing here? And why on this day? Naruto walked past him and into the house, only stopping to take off his shoes. Sasuke followed him, curious and annoyed. They stopped in front of a closed door. Sasuke's blood began to stir once seeing whose door it was. _Itachi's..._

Naruto turned to Sasuke, "you don't have to go in if you don't want to." He went inside, leaving Sasuke alone in the hallway. Sasuke stayed rooted, emotions conflicting. He swallowed and walked inside. He saw Naruto lying on Itachi's bed, gazing at a photo. The picture was of the three of them: Sasuke was on Itachi's shoulders and Naruto was pouting. He heard Naruto start speaking, "hey Itachi-sensei. I know you can't hear me right now, but I'll say this anyway... I always feel closest to you here, even though you're somewhere far away. I wish that that night never happened. That way, you would still be here, training me and helping Sasuke... Maybe I'm being selfish, but I don't care. It's been hard, leaving alone. Few experience it, but those few experience pain greater than anyone else ever had... I've been alone for so long I don't even know how to make friends anymore... I guess I'm just rambling now. See you around sometime."

He got up and passed Sasuke, who had his eyes down. Sasuke waited for the door to close. He knew what loneliness was like, ever since that night he's been alone. He grabbed the photo and brought it to his room.

_Night time..._

Naruto sighed and stopped writing in his new book, For Men: the Shin-obi Life 2. Today was the day Itachi left and when Masa died, which is why he went to Sasuke's house. He went to bed and into the seal.

_Mindscape..._

In a flash of black flames, he appeared above the river, "Wha-!" He suddenly shot into the air with his skin looking slightly redder. "Hot!" He shouted and rushed to the land. He turned around and glared at Kyuubi, who was trying to look innocent.

Before Naruto could say anything she said, **today we will finish your chakra control training.** Seeing as Naruto didn't say anything, she continued, **gather chakra to the soles of your feet, and step onto the water.** He did so, but began to sink. **You need to gather more chakra.** He was at his knees now. **Gather more chakra if you want to go up.** He was at his waist. **Gather more chakra, BAKA!**

"Fine!" Naruto shouted, but suddenly shot 5 meters into the air. He landed back in the water, but shot out again complaining about how hot it was. Kyuubi grinned and watched him try to find a balance. About 5 minutes later he could stay up on his ankles, but they would keep going up and down. 2 minutes later, he could stand. She pushed him with her tail, and he began to walk. (7)

_Dream..._

_4th and last letter he's read from Itachi:_

_Dear Naruto-san,_

_I have informed the Sandaime of my problem, and he understands. You are free to talk to him about me and the letters. Our leader is still talking about the demons. How is Sasuke doing? I heard that he's been growing strong. I hope that it isn't for revenge. Also, I heard that you weren't allowed into the academy, I'm sorry to hear that. Happy birthday, by the way. 11 is pretty old._

_-Uchiha, Itachi, Konoha Nuke-nin_

It was finally the end of the academy. Naruto came in late as usually, but Iruka decided to punish him this time, "Well class, since Naruto is late, you all have to practice henge again!"

The class groaned, and Sasuke said, "This is all your fault, dobe," which was backed up by Ino and Sakura. Naruto shrugged and got behind him in line.

Sakura went first, and transformed into a copy of Iruka. Iruka marked down a grade, and Inner Sakura shouted, _Take that Ino-pig!_ Sasuke went next and also transformed into Iruka. He walked away before Iruka could say anything.

Naruto was up next, "I give you the ultimate Jutsu. Henge." What appeared out of the smoke was an image of perfection: He appeared as Kyuubi's female form (he still doesn't know it was her), naked. Iruka's eyes went wide, and he shot back from the force of his nosebleed. He turned around and blew a kiss to the class. Every guy besides Shino had nosebleeds, while the girls face faulted. Seeing nothing happen to Shino, she pressed up against him and said, "Don't you like me Shino-chan? I'll be a good girl, I promise." Shino started to tremble, and Naruto continued, "Do you need to punish me Shino-chan? You can get the-" Suddenly, Shino shot back with a nosebleed larger than Iruka's. Naruto dispelled the henge and gave a victory sign, "and thus, I'm the last one standing."

Iruka shot back to his feet and stated yelling, "WHAT ARE YOU THINKING NARUTO? THIS ISN'T A TIME FOR GOOFING OFF!"

Naruto looked calmly up at him, "I'm not goofing off. That was a henge, so you can't yell at me, and it was perfect if the nosebleeds were any indication. Besides, in a real shinobi battle, that could give me the edge to win." Iruka sighed and told the class to get back to their seats.

Once they sat down, he saw Shikamaru wiping his nose muttering, "What a troublesome Jutsu, Naruto." He also saw Kiba and Chouji wiping their noses. The best in his opinion was Shino, still in the wall, glaring at him.

Inside the seal, Kyuubi was a whole new shade of red. She was extremely pissed off that Naruto just showed the whole class her nude body, and extremely embarrassed from the effect.

_Next day..._

"Okay Naruto now I want you to do Bunshin," Iruka said with a straight face.

Naruto nodded and started gathering chakra. Right when he released it, his chakra spiked, _Kuso! Not again!_ On the ground was a dead version of Naruto in faded clothes (think of the episode).

All three of them sweat-dropped. Iruka sighed, "You fail, Naruto."

Mizuki spoke, "but Iruka, he did make a clone, and this is his first year in the academy, can't we just-"

"No, everyone else make three working clones, and he slept through all the classes," Iruka gave a sad glance towards Naruto. Naruto bowed his head and left the class room.

He glanced at the swing, where he used to go when lonely, before shaking his head and going on to Ichiraku. The chief, seeing Naruto crestfallen mode, gave him a free bowl. Naruto thanked him and cleared it in 5 seconds. He left to his apartment and jumped on the roof. He went deep in thought, trying to figure out why his chakra spiked again, even after all of the training he had to control it.

After 10 minutes of thinking, Mizuki appeared. Naruto glanced at him and Mizuki said, "I'm sorry you didn't pass, but did you know that there is a secret way to become a Genin?"

_Night time..._

"Alright everyone, Naruto stole the Forbidden Scroll, I want you to bring him back ALIVE!" the Hokage shouted to everyone. They nodded and puffed out of existence. Iruka frowned at hearing the news, _what are you thinking, Naruto?_

Naruto set the scroll down and opened it. He heard Kyuubi say, **you know how pissed everyone is going to be when they find out you stole it? This isn't even a way to pass the test.**

Naruto kept reading the scroll, "I know, but the Yondaime wrote this. That means that it might have info on the seal. Also, I need to learn some new Jutsu." The Kyuubi raised an eyebrow; he was going to get her out of the seal? She never asked before, so why?

_Let's see here... Kage Bunshin: use your chakra to compress air into a solid and place a hedge to look like yourself over it. Easy enough... Now, what else is there? Three steps for Rasengan... might take awhile, so I'll skip it. Katon: Zangaiko No Jutsu (Fire style: Wreckage Child Technique, I like the sound of that. Create a shell of chakra around a fireball and mold it into a human shape. Move the chakra limps like a normal humans limbs. Command the Jutsu to self-destruct against opponent. Make clone smaller for bigger explosion. Okay, now for the seal... Here it is; seals the soul and chakra of victim inside container, while sacrificing the caster's soul and victim's body to death god. The container has access to chakra, and can create the victims body out of it in the real world. The container can release the victim, but the victim will die once running out of chakra, and has no physical body to make more_, Naruto explained to Kyuubi.

**So I guess there's no letting me out, huh?** Kyuubi sighed. She suddenly felt herself being dragged. She dug her claws in the ground, but it didn't help. Suddenly, her vision flashed red, and she felt the need to vomit. She opened her eyes and gasped, she was out side the seal in fox-form, about a meter high. She saw Naruto on the ground, panting. She picked him up with her tails and grinned, **I should just kill you now.** She tightened her grip on him and heard a popping sound. He gave a cold glare at her, but didn't say anything.

Suddenly, she felt an explosion go off underneath her and flew backwards, releasing her grip on Naruto. Naruto picked himself off the ground and had two Zangaiko at his sides. They both were about half his size, and had a blue glow around them. He glared emotionlessly at the now standing Kyuubi, "So you're going to abandon and betray me too. Since your chakra is out of my system, I have perfect chakra control. So now, even though you broke my arm, I can still do Jutsu."

Kyuubi rushed him, but was blown back by another Zangaiko explosion. Naruto, noticing that he only had 1 left, created 2 more. They formed a triangle around him. _Kuso, I can't beat him, even though he only has half a tails worth of power. Wait a second... Zangaiko is a fireball molded by chakra, so if I compress it and take away chakra from its hand, it should..._ The Zangaiko in front of him shrank to knee height and held out its hand. A large flame shot out of its hand, but it started shrinking and vanished.

Kyuubi grinned as she walked through the flame, "Fire? I was born of this!" She swung a tail and a meter high fireball shot at him. He jumped to the side and watched a Zangaiko absorb it, gaining more height.

Naruto frowned, _he's losing power, but not fast enough._ A Jutsu from a scroll popped up in his head. He sighed, _miracles come in small packages._ He placed the Zangaiko on his shoulders and gathered all of his chakra. He sent the greatest killing intent he could and stood up tall. Kyuubi faltered when noticing the power and intent. He spoke in a deep voice that rumbled throughout the clearing, "This is the end! Saotome Final Attack..." Kyuubi braced herself; this was going to be big. "... RUN AWAY!" Naruto took off at full speed through the forest behind him, using the gathered chakra to make his legs move faster. He headed to where he was supposed to meet Mizuki.

Kyuubi face-faulted in pure shock, and when she got up, she face-faulted again at how stupid it was. She growled in annoyance from her spot in the ground. She picked herself up and cursed herself for being such a fool. Then she cursed again when noticing the lost time. She began to chase after him, but felt the last of her powers fading away. Her vision flashed red again and she appeared back inside the seal.

Naruto sighed in relief when he felt her chakra flowing through his body again. Deciding to punish her, he changed the mindscape back into the sewer. Suddenly he got an idea that even the mightiest god or demon would fear.

_Mindscape..._

Kyuubi sighed when she saw the cage change back into the sewer. Suddenly, a feeling of dread passed through her. She briefly wondered what it was once it passed. Hearing a noise, she looked down and screamed. Before her was...

_Real world..._

Naruto kept his cold, emotionless face when he heard the Kyuubi start screaming. He heard the Kyuubi starting to cry and begging him to make _it_ go away. He began to feel pity, but his sadistic side killed that and enjoyed the screams. _Serves him right; arm hurts like hell._

He looked at the forbidden scroll again and saw that the Kage Bunshin would be easier than the regular Bunshin for him. This was just compressed air and hedge. Sensing someone coming, he commanded the Zangaiko to hide.

He saw Iruka burst through the trees. He rolled his eyes when Iruka started yelling, but when he asked why he stole it, Naruto said, "Mizuki said that if I learned a technique from it, I could pass the Genin test."

He saw Iruka's eyes squint in confusion, before bursting open in understanding. He suddenly shouted, "get down!" and attempted to push him out of the way of incoming shuriken and kunai. Naruto grabbed Iruka's outstretched arm and flung him to the side and took the projectiles. Iruka watched in horror as Naruto's body became embedded with the weapons, but sighed in relief when he saw ninja smoke appearing. _Kawarimi..._ What he didn't see was that there was no switching item, symbolizing it as a Kage Bunshin.

Mizuki landed on a branch, "Pretty quick thinking, dead-last, but why you would save a man who despises you so much?" Naruto starred coldly at him. Mizuki, taking that as a sign of confusion, began to break the Sandaime's law, "Didn't you know, Naruto, that Iruka hates you. It's why he never passed you in the Genin exam. Do you know why?" He ignored Iruka's shouts to stop and grinned, "You killed his parents!" He frowned when he noticed that Naruto's look never changed. He continued, "There is a secret that everyone kept hidden from you, Naruto." Iruka's shouts became more desperate. "The secret is that you're... THE KYUUBI!"

Iruka gave a horrified glance at Naruto and tried to see his expression. He face-faulted at Naruto's answer, "I already knew that I contained the Kyuubi. Also, Baka, I'm not the Kyuubi, just a container. I'm currently enjoying his screams right now."

Mizuki gasped at that information, but then ground his teeth in frustration and shouted, "Give me the scroll or I'll kill Iruka!" Naruto shrugged and picked up the scroll.

Iruka grew a horrified expression, and was about to shout run, when Naruto hit Mizuki in the head with the scroll. He face-faulted and sighed, _I'm just going to stay here and see how it goes... This is just too weird._

Mizuki snarled and made a grab for the scroll, but Naruto side stepped, "That was for threatening my sensei." He did a cross shape with his fingers. He gathered chakra and felt the spike, but instead of slowing the chakra flow, it sped it up. Thousands of clones filled up the clearing. They cracked their knuckles, "This is for calling me a demon." The clones beat him into unconsciousness. The Zangaiko suddenly jumped out of the trees and self-destructed on him, "and that was because I'm bored."

Iruka sighed in relief because his head was already in the ground. Naruto helped him up, and they noticed that it was already sunrise. His face turned into a smile and he said, "Close your eyes Naruto, I got a surprise for you." Naruto did so and felt something press against his forehead. He opened his eyes and saw that Iruka was missing his head protector. Putting 2 and 2 together he assumed that he was wearing Iruka's. "Congratulations, graduate!"

Naruto made another Zangaiko and placed the forehead protector around its neck. "Well, that was fun. Who's up for Ramen?" Iruka face-faulted.

In her cage, Kyuubi was still crying. She would forever suffer mental trauma, and would never be the same. Suddenly, _it_ renewed its energy and began again. Fear the almighty horror of...

* * *

OMG I finished! Alright everyone, its 2:30 a.m. for me right now, so there will be errors. So... sleepy... Also, tell me where the grammar/spelling errors are so I can fix them. Yes, I will actually fix them unlike so many other authors.

(1) She is always in fox-form. Also, never think Naruto knows it's a girl. He won't know until his fight with Gaara.

(2) Guess what he does.

(3) He uses complicated like how Shikamaru uses Troublesome, but only with the Rookie 9 + 3.

(4) In a month each one gives something like that. Also, he can't use them all at once since that would kill him.

(5) Yes Ranma fans, yes. I couldn't resist.

(6) Inuzuka noses are super strong, Naruto's nose is the same, and Shino has the male bugs to sniff them out.

(7) In the anime, after like 10-15 tries, he could get to his ankles WITH that 5 element seal, once it was removed, he could do it. I think that without the seal he could do it in one minute, but I'll keep it at this time.

Churro: 20,000 words you say? Only 12 chapters for the story, an easy edit? BAH! Just this chapter is 12,000 words! I have better things to do!

Sub-Zero: Stop complaining, I made a torture scene just for you.

Churro: That was short, and he got all soft on us.

Sub-Zero: Killing her makes him soft? Okay... And what do you mean you got better things to do?

Sub-Zero looks to his left and sees a 'this side up' sign. He looks to his right and sees a 'fragile' sign.

Sub-Zero: We live in a CARDBOARD BOX! WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY HAVE TO DO?

Churro: I... I... I HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE! I'LL SHOW YOU!

Next day...

Sub-Zero: Hey... Is this... is this Mallet-sama?

Churro: OMG it is!

Sub-Zero: And the magic words are... CHURRO NO BAKA! (thud) Hey... Churro, you okay?

Churro: Ku-Kurenai, don't spank Anko... Anko put your... clothes back on... Tsuna-chan, you make a nice pillow.

Sub-Zero: Good just asleep... Now, CHURRO NO HENTAI! (thud)


	3. Bridge

The finished chapter three is here! By the way, all of Naruto's enemies will be extreamly strong. This way it won't be something stupid like "An then the epix Naurto like 1 shotted Orochimaru and pwned him in da fase cause hez uber like that!!!1!!"

Disclaimer: TAKE YAOI AND YURI OFF THIS SITE! Seriously check for your self. Yaoi, yaoi, naruhini, INCEST, yaoi, yuri, Sasusaku.

Churro: that's not a disclaimer...

Sorry, but I forgot to describe what a Zangaiko looks like. It looks like a faceless, bald kid, and its skin is like a fireball, but the flames never leave the chakra shell, giving it a human shape.

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Ice that Fuels Fire: Bridge

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_The next day..._

Naruto made a Zangaiko and placed his forehead protector around its neck. He put on his new suit. It was a black T-shirt with a symbol on the back and black pants. The symbol was of a Zangaiko riding on a large red fox. He then put on a crimson cloak that covered everything. The Zangaiko jumped onto his head and lay down. He put on x4 gravity seals, and left to go meet Lee.

Naruto stopped halfway into the clearing and got into a defensive stance. Lee stopped his kicks and turned around. Lee was wearing a black Chinese shirt and black fighting pants. His hair was still in a pig-tail and his eyebrows were normal. Lee smirked as he got into an offensive stance.

Lee charged Naruto and started with a neck-chop. The Zangaiko rolled to Naruto's shoulder and stopped the attack. Naruto didn't even move. Lee went down and tried to trip him. Naruto calmly stepped back, the kick barely missing him. Naruto stretched his arm out and the Zangaiko started running down it. The Zangaiko jumped onto Lee and started shooting small flames on different spots.

Lee quickly grabbed him and tried to fling him at a tree, but when Lee touched him, the Zangaiko exploded. Lee jumped back to escape the flames, but saw too late that Naruto was behind him. Naruto did a side kick that launched Lee into the flames. Lee started spinning, and when he got near the flames, the winds opened a safe path to travel through. "Tsuuga?" Naruto asked.

From the other side of the flames, Lee shouted, "Iie, that requires chakra, this was just physical strength." With that, Lee burst threw the flames and launched a punch at Naruto's midsection. Naruto deflected it, but winced from the force of blow. Lee suddenly vanished, and Naruto felt a strong kick land in his abdomen. He was shot 10 meters into the air, and found that Lee was right behind him. Lee was about to elbow him, but he increased that gravity seals to x20, and shot to the ground, out of reach.

Around 3 meters above the ground, he set the seals back to 4 and landed on his feat. He winced from the landing. Lee landed 10 meters away and shot back at him. They began a Taijutsu battle. After about 10 minutes, they separated. They both were breathing hard, and Naruto removed his seals, and one of Lee's blue seals turned green. Lee stopped panting and smirked.

They shot back at each other and began again. Naruto's speed was much faster, so Lee couldn't hit him, but every blow that Naruto did, Lee barely felt. Naruto suddenly got an idea and shot back in again. Lee prepared for him and lashed out with a kick. Naruto slowly hit his stomach twice and lept back, away from the kick. Lee stepped forward again, but faltered when feeling immense pain in his stomach.

He glanced at Naruto's face, in which Naruto replied with, "that was 50 of my fastest punches, your eyes just couldn't see it." Lee charged back in, his green seal turned white, and another turned green.

After about an hour of sparing, they both sat down exhausted. All of Lee's seals were white and Naruto had his gravity seals back on. Naruto picked up his unscratched forehead protector and put it on another Zangaiko. Lee let out a sigh, "I can't believe I used all of my seals in that fight. He then cocked his head to the side and asked curiously, "How come you're your forehead protector isn't burnt? It was there during the explosion."

Naruto glanced at him through the corner of his eye, "the cloth is immune to fire. You did well today; all you need now is to work on your speed. Here," He placed an x2 gravity seal on each leg and arm. "If you need to remove them, just will it and it will deactivate." Lee accepted the answer and Naruto left.

After about 2 minutes of regaining his breath, Gai came into the clearing, "MY YOUTHFUL STUDENT, I HAVE A GIFT: TRAINING WEIGHTS!" Lee just pointed to the gravity seals and Gai face-faulted.

Naruto had ramen and left to the academy an hour late. Once inside he heard Iruka say, "And now for the teams. Team 1 will have... NARUTO YOUR LATE! You just missed my speech!"

Naruto nodded and sat down, "And that's why I'm late." He sat down next to Shikamaru and Shino and went to sleep.

Iruka grew a vein, but continued with the teams. Naruto woke up once hearing his name, "For team 7 we have Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura-" He started banging his head with a book. "-and the final member is Uchiha Sasuke." Naruto put the book down and started bashing his head in with a metal board. Where he got it, no one knew. Everyone sweat-dropped at Naruto display, which grew in size when they noticed that the board was denting.

_After class..._

Naruto and Shikamaru where playing Go, with Kiba and Chouji eating chips and watching. Shino was somewhere hidden. Naruto sighed after he moved another piece, "I got stuck with the fan-girl AND stick-up-the-butt pretty boy."

Shikamaru nodded in pity and moved a piece, "Yea, it's troublesome. I at least got Chouji, and Kiba got Shino."

Chouji spoke up, "Hey Naruto, shouldn't you get back to class? I mean we already did introductions with our sensei, and yours couldn't be 2 hours late, could he?"

"It's Kakashi, Chouji. He will be three hours late and give an excuse about getting lost or helping someone. Sometimes dancing," Naruto replied. They had gotten used to Naruto knowing things about everyone. It freaked them out the first month, but they got over it. Naruto pulled out a cup with holes in its lid and handed it to his Zangaiko. The Zangaiko nodded and ran to the roof entrance. He held out the cup, and a hand grabbed it. A form sat up, revealing Shino, and opened the jar.

A little purple and pink spider came out, and Shino let it crawl around his hand, "Hmm... I have never seen one of these before. Where did you get it?"

Naruto stood up after beating Shikamaru and said, "I found it in my morning spar. Thought you might be interested in it." Shino nodded and disappeared.

Just as he disappeared, the entrance door opened, revealing Shikato and Chouza. They took Shikamaru and Chouji home, leaving Kiba and Naruto alone. "Now that the mature people are gone, want to pull a prank on Kakashi with me?"

Kiba liked the idea and was about to go down to the class room, when his ear was grabbed and a female voice said, "Nope, you're going home." They turned around and saw Hana. Naruto could've sworn that her vest was zipped down even farther. He saw her looking at him through the corner of her eye, "Like what you see, Uzumaki?"

Naruto kept a straight face when answering, "Of course." He heard Kyuubi growl and he placed _IT_ back in her cage. The screams came soon after.

Kiba suddenly shouted, "Stop hitting on my sister!"

Naruto waved him off, "Don't worry Kiba. She'd too old for me anyway. I'm just enjoying the view." A fist was suddenly implanted in his head and a shout of hentai was heard.

_An hour later..._

He finally decided to pull the prank on Kakashi by himself, and he was currently waiting for him to come. The screen opened and an eraser fell on Kakashi head. He stared blankly at the class room and said, "And my first impression of you is-"

He was cut off when a trip wire caught on his leg and pulled him to the ceiling. He was about to do the seal for release, when a miniature but heavy hammer started heading for his face, he caught it, but it suddenly exploded due to a small bomb inside of it. It didn't hurt him, but it left his guard open for the three rubber balls that hit him. A kunai launched from another trap and grazed his arm. He quickly grabbed it and cut the wire. While falling, he hit several more tripwires that gave more pain and humiliation, before finally he hit the last one, which tied him up. "-I hate you!"

They were on the roof with a pissed off Kakashi. He started, "Okay everyone, start with your names, likes, dislikes, hobbies, and dreams."

Sakura, being completely clueless, asked, "Why don't you go first? Just so we get an idea on what to say."

He closed his eye and pointed to himself, "Okay, my name is Kakashi, I like and dislike many things, I have hobbies, and my dreams are none of your business." Sakura sweat-dropped. He pointed to Sakura, "your turn, Pinky."

"My name is Sakura, and I like..., my hobby is..., my dreams are..., and I dislike Ino-pig!" Sakura said, blushing and staring at Sasuke. Kakashi pointed to Sasuke.

"Uchiha, Sasuke, I don't like much, my hobby is getting stronger, and my dream... Iie, its more of an ambition, is to kill a certain man. I also want to rebuild clan," stated pretty boy.

Naruto snorted, "Well you can't rebuild your clan if all you want to do is get revenge on Itachi-sensei." Sasuke glared at Naruto, but he ignored him, "I guess I'm next. Uzumaki Naruto, I like ramen, my old and new sensei, Sandaime, my new friends, and a departed friend. I dislike Yondaime, people who betray others, people who only join to be a ninja to impress another and have mental instabilities that talk to them by yelling and have the word 'inner' on their foreheads (Sakura), people who put their friends in danger, late sensei, people who only want power to kill their older brother who killed their clan (Sasuke), and the author of Icha-Icha Paradise. My hobbies are making my friends stronger. And my dream is... a secret!" Everyone face-faulted.

"Well at least you like your new sensei..." Kakashi said, trying to look on the bright side. Everyone else had a sweat-drop.

Naruto stared coldly at Kakashi, "It's not you."

Kakashi stood up, "Well, everyone meet at training ground 7 at 9:00, we have survival training. And don't eat or you'll throw up!"

He poofed out of existence and Sakura shouted after him, "We already did survival training in the academy!"

The Zangaiko jumped onto Naruto's head and they poofed out of existence. They appeared on Lee's training log. Naruto laid back and watched the sunset. After Lee finished, Naruto said, "Take a walk with me." Lee nodded and they left through Konoha's gate.

They went walked around in silence until they reached a lake. Naruto sat down and motioned for Lee to sit with him. Lee did so and Naruto said, "You have been wanting to talk with me for awhile now. We have free time." It was night fall and the moon was reflecting off the water.

Lee nodded, "Yes, I have been wondering for awhile now, why do you help me? Of all the people in Konoha, why me?"

"You have experienced loneliness and still smile. It's a hard thing to do, but you still do it. I sense a lot of inner strength in you, and I decided to help you release it. The world needs to see good people like you. Also, I'm pretty sure that if I didn't do anything, you would end up looking like a clone of Gai, always sprouting things about youth," Naruto replied, staring into the fire light that was a Zangaiko.

Lee snickered, "I can see that, 'THE FLAMES OF YOUTH BURN BRIGHTLY IN YOU, NARUTO-SAN!'... Another thing, these seals are always changing color, can you explain what each one means?"

Naruto sighed and gazed up at the stars, "The seals are energy absorbers, their real color is black, but since your body doesn't make chakra, it keeps all of the extra spiritual energy, which the seals absorbed, turning them white. The blue is chakra, so you can actually do Jutsu if you wanted. Also with blue, you could take some physical energy from it and use it as a soldier pill, as you did today. If you do that, they turn green, into the seals of healing. You noticed that already. The green chakra is formed by putting more spiritual than physical energy when making chakra. It is used in healing Jutsu. Red is destructive chakra, formed by putting more physical than spiritual energy in it. But there is a downside to destructive chakra; it gives the user dark thoughts, corrupting him or her into a being that isn't human. They commonly mistake this as demon chakra, which is partially true since most of the time you become a demon from using it. You should never be able to get red seals, since now they absorb spiritual energy from the ground."

Lee nodded and laid back, beginning to fall asleep. Once Lee was out, Naruto went inside the seal. He saw the Kyuubi wrapped in her tails, rocking back and forth. "Why did you attack me?" Kyuubi didn't answer and a form began to appear in front of Naruto.

"**NO! NO MORE! PLEASE I BEG OF YOU! I'LL TELL YOU, JUST MAKE IT STOP!"** Kyuubi cried out. The form vanished, and the Kyuubi started, **"It was a test to see how you would hold out against me. I needed to make you fight back at your all, and you wouldn't do that if I asked. I also had to make sure you wouldn't crack from another betrayal."**

Black flames began to surround Naruto's form, he said, "Betrayal is the only thing worse than loneliness. You will go though 2 more hours of torture, and then I'll change everything back to normal." With that, the flames completely surrounded him and he vanished.

(This next scene is rated M due to traumatizing images) Kyuubi gulped and looked at the now formed torturer. He had an insane grin and was holding a torture device. The man had black hair in a bowl cut and a green suit. His most noticeable trait was extra large eyebrows. He held out the torture devise, revealing a suit made for a large, four legged animal. He shouted, "BEHOLD THE GLORIOUS FLAMES OF YOUTH! YOU CAN NOW JOIN OUR YOUTHFUL GROUP WITH THIS NEW SIZE." Before the Kyuubi could say anything, the suit magically appeared on her. She screamed. Suddenly, Gai started taking off his shirt saying, "THE FLAMES OF YOUTH ARE MAKING ME HOT IN THIS! BEHOLD MY YOUTHFUL MUCSLES!" His teeth and chest suddenly shined. Kyuubi screamed again.

Naruto winced slightly, _maybe the suit was too much..._ He then shrugged and left the camp. He stopped in a clearing far away from everything and got into a meditation position.

2 hours later, he dropped the torture on Kyuubi. He changed the scenery back to normal, and entered the seal. He saw Kyuubi shivering and curled into a little ball, tails wrapped around her. She looked at him when he entered, and he noticed the eyes were devoid of soul. He waved briefly and said, "Hey." Kyuubi just blinked lifelessly at him. "Are you traumatized to the point where you can't talk?" No reply. _This might take awhile..._

_Training ground 7 at 9:00..._

Sakura and Sasuke had everything ready and were waiting patiently.

_Training ground 7 at 10:00..._

Sakura and Sasuke were lying down, annoyed at the absence of their sensei and teammate, while suffering from hunger.

_Training ground 7 at 11:00..._

"WHERE ARE THEY?!" the devil himself err herself shouted.

Just as she said that, 2 poofs of smoke happened, revealing Naruto and Kakashi, who said in union, "Yo!"

Sakura had a demonic look in her face as she screeched, "YOU'RE LATE!"

Naruto shrugged, "The world's a big place."

Kakashi eye turned into a smile (really creepy if you ask me), and he said, "I got lost on the road of life..."

Sakura screeched liar, and Naruto replied by, "It takes a man with one eye to get lost on that path, Pinky." Kakashi glared at Naruto who shrugged it off.

Seeing that glaring was getting him nowhere, he started his explanation of the exam, "Now then, it's time to start with the exam. The objective is to get a bell." He held up 2 bells and continued, "I'll be guarding them so it isn't easy. Whoever gets a bell passes. You have one hour to get them. Once time is up you can eat lunch."

"So that's why you told us not to eat breakfast!" Sakura shouted.

Kakashi didn't reply as he set the alarm for 1 hour. He set the clock down on a log and said, "You must come at me with intent to kill, or else you'll never get one. And... GO!"

Everyone disappeared besides Naruto, who pulled out a pen and a book and sat down on the log. Kakashi blinked, pulled out Icha-Icha Paradise, and puffed onto the log next to Naruto. Remembering something, Kakashi asked, "Why don't you like the author of this book?"

Naruto took the book from Kakashi and flipped through it. Kakashi raised an eyebrow when he noticed that Naruto wasn't getting a nosebleed. Naruto closed the book and handed it back to him. He then pulled out his first book and gave that to Kakashi, "Here, this should explain why. I wrote this." Kakashi briefly glanced at the title before reading it. After a few pages, he had a large blush and was letting out little giggles.

Kakashi closed it after finishing the first chapter and wondered why Sasuke and Sakura haven't attacked yet. He mentally shrugged and turned to Naruto, "I see, he's your competition. I have to say, the title fooled me. Now Kurenai will stop complaining about me being a bad influence."

Naruto nodded and gave his second book to him, "One more thing, when people ask why you're reading this, tell them that I made you find the error of your ways. Also, I want you to think about how you stopped revealing to everyone that you're a pervert, just in case someone uses a truth potion on you."

"I'm sure no one would use a truth potion on me for this."

_Kurenai..._

"Achoo!" A half empty bottle fell from her pocket, showing the name 'pervert revealer.' She quickly stuffed it back in and hoped no one noticed.

_Training ground 7 at 11:15..._

Sasuke finally had enough of waiting. He burst through the trees and flung shuriken and kunai at Kakashi. They all hit, but Kakashi suddenly poofed, revealing a log. Sasuke franticly glanced around for him, but heard a voice behind his ear, "Boo." Sasuke's vision blurred, and then cleared up showing destruction everywhere. The nauseating smell of decaying flesh filled his nose, causing him to get light headed.

Kakashi saw Sasuke looking around with blank eyes and buried him up to his neck. After that, he went to go find Sakura.

Sakura was quickly jumping from tree to tree, franticly searching for her Sasuke-kun. Quickly getting tired from the pace, she sat down on a branch. She felt a breath on her neck and stiffened. She slowly turned her neck and saw... Naruto?

Naruto pushed her off the branch and jumped down. He pulled out a kunai and charged. She franticly searched for her own kunai, but the fear made her hand unsteady. She got grazed on the cheek and fell to her knees from the killing intent, "Wh-why? Why a-are you d-doing this?"

Naruto wiped the blood off with his wrist, which the trained eye would notice that was missing the scar, and said, "A shinobi must be prepared for anything, including betrayal. Besides I need that bell and you're in the way." 'Naruto' cast a genjutsu, which showed a kunai pierce her gut. She feinted before it even reached her.

Naruto poofed, revealing Kakashi, and dragged her back into the main clearing. Kakashi, getting a cruel idea, positioned her head so that the first thing she sees is Sasuke's head sticking out of the ground. Kakashi sat back on the log and continued reading Naruto's book.

_30 min. later_

Sakura woke up to an annoying ringing sound. Keeping her eyes closed, she swatted her alarm clock. The ringing continued, and she heard a grunt. Realizing that she wasn't alone she opened her eyes and saw... SASUKE! She jumped up and shouted, "I SLEPT WITH SASUKE-SAMA! TAKE THAT INO-PIG!" She then noticed that it was only a head on the ground and feinted.

Sasuke, Kakashi, and Naruto blinked. They blinked again. Suddenly Sasuke's face became extremely red and Kakashi smirked. The sides of Naruto's lips twitched, giving the closest thing to a smile in years. In her cage, Kyuubi was roaring with laughter, **SASUKE-SAMA!**

_Later..._

Sasuke and Sakura were eating their lunches away from each other, while Naruto was sitting ON the log. The log had a scorch mark on it and burned ropes at the bottom. Kakashi sighed as he looked at them, but gave a small, perverted giggle when seeing Naruto, "Well... you fail!"

Naruto held up a bell, "So." Kakashi's eye widened a little as he got a memory.

_Flashy..._

_Naruto released his gravity seals, and with his fastest speed, grabbed a bell and hid it while Kakashi was turning a page. Kakashi briefly itched himself there and let out another giggle._

Kakashi quickly got rid of his shock of a genin tricking him and said, "You still fail Naruto because the real point of this test is-"

"Teamwork, I know. Itachi-sensei told me, along with my other new sensei," Naruto said while tossing the bell back to him, "And don't start saying I should have done something with them. If I asked Pinky she would start talking about how she only needs Sasuke and if I asked him he'd start saying I'm weak and he could defeat you on his own. And another thing, if you try to do the lunch teamwork thing to me, I'll just tell them about it. Just say we pass..."

Kakashi had a sweat-drop, "You pass?"

_Later..._

"Naruto, you need to smile in your identification photo," the Sandaime sighed while looking at the neutral face of Naruto. Naruto handed him another photo and he sweat-dropped. The photo saw of a 6 year old Naruto riding on Itachi's shoulders. "Maybe one without a nuke-nin?"

"Choose one 'cause that's all I got. Besides, you know that Itachi isn't really a criminal," just as he finished saying that the door was opened and a form charged in. The forms childish cape caught on its foot, tripping it.

Konohamaru jumped up and pointed a finger at Naruto, "You tripped me!"

Naruto quickly recognized him as Sandaime's grandson. Teaching the boy respect, he slapped him and said, "Don't interrupt others conversations and don't give fault to those who don't deserve it." Konohamaru had a stunned look on his face as he held his reddening cheek. Naruto got up and did a transformation, "here kid this is how you defeat the Hokage. Now Sarutobi-sama, could you please choose from one of those photos? I'll be a good girl I promise, or do you want a bad girl? I can be REAL bad. Spank the naughty Naruto-chan," The hokage shot back into the wall, twitching.

Konohamaru's eyes widened, _he just defeated the Hokage!_ Remembering his manners, he got into a bow and said, "Can you teach me that PLEASE!" After a paused he added, "Naruto-sensei."

Naruto studied the now bowing boy. He quickly glanced to the door, noticing that someone had been standing there, _I didn't even sense him coming... Jounin at minimum._ "Hello Naruto-kun, I see you have caught the boy." He noticed Konohamaru bowing and gasp "AND TAUGHT THE BOY MANNERS!" Then glancing at the unconscious Hokage "and defeated... the... Hokage..." And promptly fainted. _I take that back..._

"Sure I'll teach you kid, only if you promise to treat others as equals. You seem to have let the fact that you are the Hokage's grandson get to your head."

_Later..._

Naruto and Konohamaru were out in the forest. Naruto put his hands into the position of the henge technique, "Now watch closely." He used it and once again turned into the Kyuubi's female body. Due to his "relevant" innocence, Konohamaru didn't get a nose bleed. "Now you try."

Konohamaru put his hands into position and focused on a picture of a beautiful woman with no clothes on. He molded his chakra and with a shout turned into a... fat person.

Naruto grew a sweat drop, "that's not exactly right." And so the process continued, with each new henge looking better than the last.

Konohamaru collapsed; a person of his strength wasn't supposed to use that much chakra. He did it around forty different times, showing his incredible will power and effort towards reaching his goal. His last one look alright body wise, but the face needed much improvement. He forced himself back up to a standing position, breathing hard. _I have one more try. If I don't do it now, I will have disgraced myself and let my sensei down..._

Just as Konohamaru got his hands back into position, Ebisu burst through the bushes, "Hold it right there. I promised Hokage-sama that I would train you if you want to be the best, you must stick with me. Have you forgotten your goal?"

(I know this part comes later, but I'm trying to shorten this) Konohamaru weakly looked at his old sensei, "Ebisu-sensei, true power can't be taught by just sticking with you, I need to train to my full potential and find that strength myself." He recited that from one of Naruto's teachings.

Ebisu was shocked, _how truly wise is Naruto? Maybe he would be a better teacher than me for this boy..._ He smiled gently towards Konohamaru, "if you keep that train of thought, you will become an excellent shinobi."

But all good things must come to an end, "and check out my new jutsu he taught me. Sexy no Jutsu!" And thus it was perfected. A quite curvy brunette came out of the mist. She looked like a goddess to a man, and it quite thoroughly took him back a few feet, into a tree, leaving a nice trail of blood.

From Naruto's perch in the tree above he watched with interest, _so the kid mastered it. He even made his own look. If he keeps that up he WILL turn into a fine shinobi._

From her spot in her cell Kyuubi couldn't be more humiliated. Her body has been used countless times as an object of lust, all because of a simple joke.

_The next day..._

Team 7 was at the mission briefing room, about to be handed their first mission. _**You best destroy any documents handed to Ero-Kakashi. They will be rank 'D' and most likely require you to 'rescue' cats.**_ Sarutobi handed a paper to Kakashi, which was mysteriously destroyed before he could grab it. Kakashi glanced at Naruto who ever so kindly glared back. The Hokage began to hand another paper... which also 'mysteriously' disappeared. "Ano... Naruto-kun do you have a problem with these missions?" asked Kakashi.

"It's 'C' class or nothing," came the emotionless reply. The Hokage sighed, knowing that it was 'C' or being shot into the wall by the now 'S' ranked jutsu, Sexy no Jutsu.

"Hmmm, here is a mission to the wave country. Protect the civilian Tazuna from any local bandits and things like that," came the defeated response as Sarutobi handed the paper to Kakashi. "You can come in now, Tazuna-kun."

A drunken looking man came in holding a bottle of sake, "You expect these brats to be capable of protecting me? The short one looks like he couldn't hurt a fly."

Not taking kindly to the short comment, Naruto retaliated. He suddenly vanished, reappearing on the other side of Tazuna. He put away a paintbrush that was in his hand. Sasuke held in a gasp as he saw that Tazuna's neck, heart, temples, groin, lower stomach, and the Hokage's cheek had paint marks on them. The mark on Sarutobi was meant for the throat, but the years of training and reflexes caused him to jump back. "I just hit most of your vital points, now imagine if that was a knife."

The hokage let out a deep breath, gaining some adrenalin from that little stunt. He wiped the paint off his cheek, "as you can see, the 'short one' is quite the efficient fighter." Tazuna on the other hand, dropped his sake bottle and pissed his pants. Sure enough he accepted the team. Where was Sakura during this display? Joining Tazuna in the leaking of fluids of course.

_On the trip..._

The adventure to the wave country remained quite for the most part. When they came across a puddle in the middle of dry season, they just ignored it, well if you count Naruto throwing a kunai inside there and the water turning red ignoring it. Kakashi sighed, "Naruto I wanted those two to test out your skills as a team."

Naruto replied with, "All you would have seen in your test was the incompatibility of the team. Sasuke would try to hold his ground while Sakura became the bitch in distress. Then you or I would have come in and killed them." The slightly shaken team continued there trip.

_**Mmmm, fresh rabbit**_, came a comment of the fox, using Naruto's nose to smell a nearby rabbit. _Hungry?_ asked Naruto. _**Very much so. Please eat it raw, fresh blood is so much better than cooked. **__Too bad, I'm having a Zangaiko kill it._ And thus a Zangaiko was sent into the bush, a boom came, and a freshly cooked rabbit fell among the shrapnel, right into Naruto's hands. Naruto noticed that there was white fur among the remains, _that means this rabbit has been kept inside a house-_ _**most likely to be used as a substitution Jutsu-**__ and now we have a more experienced Ninja on our hands..._

After about one more minute of walking, Kakashi yelled for everyone to get down. Instead, Naruto jumped up and grabbed the incoming sword, intercepting its course and apparently disarming the new comer. A bandaged man appeared in front of Naruto, "I'll take my sword back now brat." Faster than Naruto can see, a fist was implanted in Naruto's solar plexus, thoroughly knocking the wind out of him and sending him back a few meters. On impact, he dropped the sword.

Naruto jumped back up and prepared to fight back. "Back down Naruto, he's out of your league," came the worried shout of Kakashi, _out of all of our leagues..._ (If you didn't read at the top, all of Naruto's enemies are a LOT stronger than in canon, matching Naruto's current skill)

Without a reply, Naruto deactivated his gravity seals and zoomed back in again, attempting to disarm him once again. Even with this astounding speed, it wasn't enough as he was sent back into the tree. _Kuso... Zabuza. If I don't get that sword away from him, we will all die._ For the first time in all serious fights, Kyuubi decided to stay quite.

Naruto teleported next to Kakashi. "Kakashi, we need to get his sword away from him. If we don't we will all die. Now is a good time to try working together. Sasuke and Sakura will only get in the way at this point."

Kakashi nodded, sharingan already out, "any ideas?" Zabuza shouldered his sword, looking ready to attack.

"Yah, try to keep up." Naruto zoomed back into the fight. Kakashi followed not a moment later. With kunai out, Naruto attack at Zabuza's right flank. Kakashi on his left. He parried Naruto's attack with his sword, and Kakashi's with a drawn kunai. _Perfect, maybe he will be a bit worse with only one hand._ This statement proved to be false as a sword put a nice cut along the front of his chest.

Sakura and Sasuke were at the sidelines, trying with futile attempts to keep up with the movements. Sakura, not wanting to be entirely useless to the team, moved to help them. She was stopped by Sasuke, "this is their battle. Stick to the mission and help me protect Tazuna, you never know if he might send a kunai to make sure he finishes HIS mission mid-fight." Being the loyal lap dog she is, she stuck to her job of protecting Tazuna.

Zabuza's eyes narrowed as he saw the brats move closer to his target. The two that were currently fighting him were not proving to be a challenge, but he still wasn't able to land any fatal blows yet. He got another gash on the young brat he was fighting, but in turn received one from the copy-cat ninja. He needed to finish this; it was proving to be quite the hassle.

Naruto was looking a little worse than wear. He had a moderate cut across his chest, and a few nicks (10-20 centimeters each) across his body. It was easily seen that the Taijustsu battle wasn't going in their favor. "Kakashi get back!" he suddenly shouted, a trick up his sleeve. He saw Kakashi nod, showing his acknowledgement, but he didn't move. Catching the hint, Naruto jumped back. As he was doing so, he sent the order for the five Zangaiko he made to attack.

Zabuza wasn't having that much fun. The little brats were hard enough to hit, being way below his height, but now these midgets are attacking him, and they are almost impossible to hit. Looking at his shins, he saw the scorch marks they made. Suddenly four of them jumped back, and the one left was getting EVEN SMALLER! Then it exploded, leaving him to fly back into a bush. The Kakashi that was still fighting, poofed revealing that it was a kage bunshin.

Before he could recover, the other four were back at him. He finally got a good swipe in and cleaved one in half, before that one exploded, however, and the three were still putting up a challenge. Finally, he extinguished them with a water jutsu.

Zabuza retreated onto a nearby lake. Remembering his chakra control training, Naruto advanced onto the lake, slightly surprising Zabuza. They once again entered a taijutsu battle, in which Naruto was losing. _Kuso! Give me chakra NOW!_ Kyuubi quickly sent half a tails worth of chakra. A now demonic looking Naruto got up.

Zabuza grinned upon seeing the different looking Naruto. "Finally decided to get serious huh? I'll still crush your b-" He was cut off by a kunai stab in his back thrown by Kakashi. He slowly melted into a water clone. The real Zabuza appeared behind Kakashi and knocked him out. _Damnit his speed is too intense. More chakra, give me a full tails worth._ (Think Naruto vs. Sasuke fight)

A howl filled the solemn battlefield. Sasuke and Sakura both were finding it hard to breath; the killing intent was so immense that it felt like the air they breathed was getting thicker. Now, one of their chances to stay alive was just knocked out. This was not looking good.

Naruto charged in with renewed energy and a speed that rivaled Zabuza's. This new taijutsu battle was a little different than the last, mainly the fact that Naruto was purposely letting Zabuza stabbing him, doing what ever it took to get close. He let the sword slide into his gut, jumping forward, letting him get closer and closer before he finally took a swipe with his claws at Zabuza's throat. It left a nasty cut, not life threatening, but enough to worry about. It was bleeding slightly, and he was glad that Naruto missed the jugular.

As soon as he made the claw attack, Naruto jumped back, and his sword wound healed almost instantly. Even though he could go with two tails for five minutes, the one tail of foreign chakra was beginning to take its toll. He charged in again to the slightly dazed Zabuza. He made a chakra claw and grabbed him in a death grip. The sounds of bones breaking filled the air. Suddenly two senbon needles were impaled into Naruto's back. He turned around and saw a mist hunter-nin.

He abandoned his grip on the unconscious Zabuza and charged the new comer. The mist-nin began doing one handed seals. She shouted, "Houhuku suru no jutsu!" (Retaliation technique! This is not a water/fire/earth/shadow type jutsu) Suddenly a line of five swords, apparently made of light, began to spin around the mis-... screw it, spin around Haku. Naruto charged in any way, noticing Haku doing more strange, one handed seals. He hit her in the chest (wink wink), and sent her back a few feet. This also interrupted her new jutsu. How ever, right when he hit her, one of the small blades of light stabbed him in the same area.

Haku got back up, _so he interrupted my shield jutsu. Hmmm, he can get back up after a single retaliation. He seems to be hurting internally. I'll just take Zabuza and be on my way._ True to her word Naruto collapsed, giving an animalistic roar while doing so.

_So this is where we fall..._ He began to lose consciousness. He saw Sasuke and Sakura out of the corner of his eye, _heh, pansies._ Kyuubi grinned, also giving up. They did the best they could, if this is where they had to die, then die they shall. _**Kit... I have something to tell you... I'm actually a...**_ she swallowed, building up her courage, _**a girl, and I really wish we could have stayed together longer. **_She checked the kit's reaction to that. She saw he was already unconscious and didn't hear her declaration. Oh, there would be pain for Naruto if he ever woke up.

_Dream... or is it? (No I will not reveal Kyuubi to Naruto sooner than his fight with Gaara, however, here is a scene in the future with him knowing about her)_

_BOOM! Another explosion happened on Naruto's left, it came from the armory. He dived in there and let a water version of Zangaiko explode, putting out the fire. Akira, now without her hat, showing off her nice cat ears, dived to his right and killed another invading ghost-nin (obake-nin from now on). Seeing an obake-nin about to get her from behind, Naruto charged, even with his seals off he knew he wouldn't make it in time, "AKIRA!" Kisame appeared behind her, cleaving off the Nin's head._

"_Akira, honey, your back won't protect itself," Kisame gently chided her. His orangish red hand, made entirely of chakra, ripped off the head of yet another obake-nin. Akira smiled brightly and gave Kisame a deep kiss._

"_Ano... couldn't you do that another time?" Naruto asked, having to defend the two from the other attackers while they did their thing._

_Kyuubi appeared next to Naruto and cleared out five of them with a sweeping claw attack, "Yah! If I can't kiss my Naru-kun during a fight, then you two can't either."_

_Naruto gasped as he saw Itachi, "SENSEI!" Itachi was surrounded by twelve of them. They charged in and thoroughly killed him, limbs and blood flying in all directions. "Itachi-sensei NO! Be a clone, be a kawarimi, BE SOMETHING ELSE! DON'T DIE! ITACHI!" The parts hit the ground with no intention of turning into smoke. Kyuubi held Naruto close, knowing that there was no way anyone could live through that. Naruto broke down, "Itachi..."_

"ITACHI!" Naruto woke with a start, notifying everyone that he was awake. Sasuke charged in, kunai drawn franticly looking for his older brother. His shouts of 'where' were unnoticed. Naruto broke down again, the dream haunting his memory. _**Kit?**_ Came the worried question of Kyuubi, grudge be damned. _It... it was so real._

Kyuubi went to the pond and searched for his dream. She viewed it and gasped, her and Naruto were together? Itachi dies that easily? Who were the obake-nins? What was with Kisame's chakra arm? Is that what Akira was hiding with her pink hat? Too many questions, too little answers.

_**Kit, that Akira girl, you remember her from the photo Itachi sent to you?**_ Kyuubi asked. _Of course, _came the weary reply from Naruto. _**Do you think that this could be... the future?**_

Team seven was shocked, Naruto can cry? Tsunami rushed in and gave a hug to Naruto, hoping to calm him down. After a while, he did. He eventually accepted the motherly embrace and returned the hug. "Sorry to break the moment Naruto, but can you tell us what happened?" asked Kakashi.

Naurto, still in the embrace, replied, "it... it was a dream." He then explained it to everyone present. He left nothing out, Kyuubi, Itachi, Kisame with the strange arm, the ghost army, Akira, and even the relationships between them.

His speech stirred mixed feelings between them. For Kakashi, _the Kyuubi is free and a girl? The way Itachi died... it was too easy. What is this ghost army?_ For Sakura, _I hope no one notices I pissed my pants_. For Sasuke, _Itachi... I will be the one to kill you. What are you doing helping Naruto? The Kyuubi is still alive?_ For Tsunami, _I don't know who or what they were talking about, but I can tell that Itachi is very important to Naruto._ _And the Kyuubi... wasn't that killed in Konoha a while back?_

Let it be said, no one slept that night.

_The next day..._

"Okay team, today we are going to try tree climbing. Gather chakra to your feet and use it to hold yourself to the tree. Too much, and it will repel you. Too little, and you won't stick. As for you, Naruto, I saw that you already mastered water walking. Any ideas on what you are going to do?" asked Kakashi. It was now the next day and they needed to prepare for the Zabu-Haku battle that was coming up. They were in their regular clothes, except Naruto, who was in bandages.

"No," Naruto dully responded, _any ideas?_ _**Yah, try channeling my chakra to your left foot and your chakra to the right.**_ He left the clearing into one that was far away from them. He channeled, as told, and tried running up a tree. His right foot attached perfectly, but when his left foot hit, he fell down. He growled as he got back up. He put more into his left foot and tried again. Once again, his right was fine, but when he got to his left, he shot back. His eye twitched.

_An hour or two later..._

There were now many places on the tree that had crunched wood, from putting out too much chakra, and large holes at the base of the tree, from not putting enough. Although, there were holes all around the clearing from him being shot back and not having a perfect landing. He finally grasped the concept and balanced it out, but he still had a long way to go before making it to the top of the tree. He can make it up half way now.

_An hour or two after that..._

He finally made it to the top of the tree. He saw that the sun was beginning to set. On his trip back down the tree, he... slipped. At the bottom he hit the ground with his head and knocked himself out. Being exhausted from the training exercise didn't help, and he slept until sunrise the next morning.

_The next morning..._

Blurry eyes opened to a dark sky. Naruto grunted as he forced himself to sit up. Shaking off the feeling of fatigue and soreness, he stood up and stretched. His clothes had little tears in them. He was covered in dirt and decided that a good old water walking exercise with both chakras would do the trick.

He sent out his senses to find the nearest source of water that wasn't the ocean. He felt the life of the forest and a relaxed sensation over came him. That is, until he came in contact with a familiar person who was headed his way. He opened his eyes and saw a girl walking towards him. She was holding a basket and seemed to be looking for something. Finding it, she smiled and picked a mushroom. She appeared not to have noticed him yet. As she went along picking the mushrooms, she finally noticed him.

"Hello," on noticing his less than perfect clothing and his muddied face, she asked, "daijyoobu?"

"Hai. Although, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be mending your precious Zabuza-san?" Naruto finally recognized her as the mist-nin, and figured this to be a peaceful meeting.

Haku frowned as he saw through her mask, "I am, these mushrooms will help cure him. You did quite the damage back there."

"Well seeing as how I was out for three days so did you."

She gave him a cute smile, "then you should train and get stronger."

Seeing that as a threat, Naruto challenged her with, "want to spar? Then we will see who needs to get stronger."

Without answering, she went through her one handed seals and made the light swords. This time she finished the second jutsu she was doing before and made a light blue shield around her. "I'm coming!" (I believed that in spars, you should announce when you are going to attack, at least in the beginning. Naruto's creator also seems to believe that when Naruto fights the bounty hunter in later episodes.)

Naruto began his part of the fight without Kyuubi's chakra.

_At the bridge builder's house an hour later..._

A boom was heard in the forest, bring the attention of Kakashi, Sasuke, and Sakura. Putting the fact that Naruto wasn't here and that they still had enemies out there, they rushed to the source of the noise. They found Naruto once again in a bloody mess. Across from him was an equally bloody girl with a torn kimono.

Both Naruto and Haku forced themselves up and began fighting again. Haku's retaliation and bubble were both gone, and Naruto's body couldn't hold any more of Kyuubi's chakra. Their slow and sloppy punches still looked like they hurt. Naruto would add gravity to his fist every time they began their decent on to her face, giving it a much greater force, then remove it once it made contact. Haku was only hitting Naruto's pressure points. In a last ditch attack, they both put the last of their chakra into their fist and hit each other. They knocked each other unconscious.

"Umm, the winner is... no one! Congratulations Naruto, you just made us more prone to Zabuza," came the sarcastic comment of Kakashi. He guided the rest of the team back to the house, letting the two work out their own problems.

Naruto slowly came to. Remembering his fight he tried to force himself to his feet. The screaming of his muscles made him thing it might me better if he stayed down. To his left, he heard Haku giggle, "You can't get up either."

Upset by the blow to his pride, he said, "Have you forgotten your job of taking those mushrooms to Zabuza?" Her giggles died and he felt much better about himself.

Eventually they got up but found that they needed support to walk. They ignored their pride as they used each other to walk. The limp both had and their thrashed clothing brought much attention to the couple. When they made it to the bridge builder's house, they collapsed. Naruto gave what little chakra he had left to her so that she could walk herself back to Zabuza's home. No one has to tell her that he also put Shino's bug on her shoulder so that he could track her to the enemies' house.

He was later found by Tsunami and brought in to rest.

_A week later..._

It was finally time for the fight. He was at the bridge keeping a watchful eye on things, when he smelled that Haku was approaching, and where one went, the other was soon to follow. He warned the employers about the incoming danger and they retreated to the village. He and Kakashi set traps every where and prepared the best they could for the duo. A mist started to build around them. It started thickening so Naruto build a few Zangaiko. He sent them out in a perimeter where they could explode without hurting him or Kakashi. Naruto grinned as he heard the sound of wood creaking. He set out old wood all across the bridge so that he could hear them no matter where they were. There was the sound of a grunt and water pouring, _so he sent his clones out first. He really is the legendary Zabuza._

Once he heard a creak near a Zangaiko, they all exploded. The fire evaporated the mist, partially clearing it. It also revealed that there were twenty Zabuza's and ten Haku's. He built thirty Kage bunshin to match them. The two armies attack each other leaving only the originals. "Well, I see you have come back for another beating Zabuza. And Haku, surely last fight you realized what would happen if you fight me?" While he acted confident on the outside, he was calculating and planning on the inside. The odds were stacked against him and Kakashi. Maybe, just maybe, Sasuke could hold off Haku long enough for them to take down Zabuza.

Zabuza whispered to Haku, "listen gaki, who ever you fight, take them down as fast and with as little energy as possible. That Kyuubi-gaki is strong and so is the copy-cat, together they might have a chance in beating me. Last time he brought out a tail, I found out his weakness with it and I'll exploit it as much as possible. I will need you help though." Haku nodded and charged in.

"Sasuke, hold off Haku! Sakura, guard Tazuna! Kakashi, try to hold him down with hypnotic eye, I got a plan," the last part Naruto whispered.

Zabuza also charged, eager for more blood. He went for the Kyuubi-gaki first, seeing him as the easiest. Naruto had two kunai out, and infused his arms with chakra, trying and failing to match Zabuza's speed. However, the second kunai out really helped with defense. Kakashi, not wanting to be left out, also charged in. _They got better,_ cursed Zabuza as he was put onto the defensive. He put half of his chakra into a water clone. It now had his current strength and could withstand hits. The two Zabuza's forces both Kakashi and Naruto onto the defensive. Parry, parry, dodge, duck, swing, parry, cut. The pattern of the fight played out in Naruto's mind. He would get one swing in come pared to Zabuza's six. The last set ended with him getting a cut. He made a few Zangaiko to help with the fight.

Kakashi was currently fighting the clone. It had taken a few cuts and yet wasn't dispelling. He wanted to get the hypnotic eye going against him, but clones don't really have minds. He tried a fire jutsu but it countered with a water one. He was thinking of a hound dog hold down and then sticking chidori through it, but it's useless to waste that much chakra on a clone. He got in another cut, but received one himself. After they separated, he checked to see how Naruto was doing.

Naruto sent in ten Zangaiko, using up a lot of chakra. The made them only inches tall so that they would make a BIG boom. However, they smaller you make one, the more chakra it takes to keep the fireball compressed. He sent them in, and on the next separation, he nodded to Kakashi and they jumped back. The boom that followed almost blew a hole through the bridge.

The clone was finally dispelled, and Zabuza was looking like an overcooked hotdog. He shakily got up and began to go through seals. He sent a water dragon at Naruto and Kakashi, which ended didn't make it due to a Zangaiko sending a fire blast to stop it. (1)

Zabuza took off a bandage that was on his shoulder, revealing a big seal. It was red, but suddenly turned black when he used it. Power coursed through Zabuza, wounds healing, normal chakra being taken over by demonic, his strength increased fivefold (if it works tenfold, why not fivefold?). He was now a true demon of the mist. "Kakashi **this is my fight now!**" Naruto's voice changed as he accepted two tails worth of chakra. The two demons charged and uhhhh boom?

Haku charged Sasuke, seeing him as an easy target. Retaliation was already up as was the shield. Sasuke knew he was out matched, but charged any way. He through a kunai which Haku willingly took. The shield absorbed the kunai, but one of the light swords reacted and stabs Sasuke. _What the?_ There were now four swords circling Haku. He sent a fire ball out, and saw that the swords didn't do anything. _So they only reflect physical attacks. _He sent out more fireballs, trying to get out of melee range. Eventually, he saw that the shield was getting weaker. He sent out a fire dragon, using up a vast amount of his chakra, and watched as the shield became destroyed and Haku became scorched.

Haku sighed as the dragon approached her, _maybe I should just finish this._ The dragon hit her, and she felt it. Getting back up, she charged back with her real speed and overwhelmed Sasuke.

Sasuke felt punches, kunai, and ice get into his guard. He finally jumped back and sent in four kunai, hoping to finish off the light swords. Needless to say, it worked. He felt them enter different parts of his body before vanishing. He collapsed, pain flaring through his body. He looked up, seeing that Haku had used little ice plates to block the kunai. He forced himself to get back up and charged.

_It's time to finish this!_ Haku made the ice mirror room around Sasuke. He gasped has he felt needles enter his body without noticing anything. He focused chakra to his eyes hoping to see something. He charged one of the mirrors, saw blur, and felt more needles. He was also hit in the stomach and sent back to the center. He channeled more and more chakra to his eyes. Finally, he felt something change. Time seemed to move in slow motion. He charged a mirror again, and this time, he saw it. Haku was literally flying from mirror to mirror. He used his kunai to block the senbon needles.

He got to the mirror and crushed it. He began to charge the next one, when he felt it. Pure demonic power. He looked over at Naruto's and Zabuza's fight and saw what he thought to be hell.

The animalistic Naruto clawed and bit his way into Zabuza. Zabuza cut Naruto into so many pieces, that he could be used for sushi (I don't know... I'm hungry ok?). Both of their demonic healing powers kept them alive and able to fight. To Kakashi's sharingan, they were naught but blurs, even then he could only see the blurs when they came in contact with each other before they parted and he couldn't see them.

Haku noticed that Zabuza was on the verge of losing and that her target was distracted. She sent a senbon needle into Sasuke's neck and rushed to help Zabuza.

Sasuke turned just in time to see a needle going for his neck, he tried to dodge it, but it was too late. It went right into his throat, and he went into shock. Slowly, he felt his strength leaving his body, and couldn't find enough to pull it out. Sakura screamed. She had been watching the every so perfect Sasuke finding this masked person, and watched with horror as a needle went into his neck. He then collapsed and she knew that no one could have lived through that.

Kakashi saw Haku charging Naruto, and moved to intercept her. He decided that now was a good time to use the dog-bird combo and summoned a team of dogs. They latched onto Haku, immobilizing her. He began to build up chakra and do the seals for chidori. The sound of a thousand birds chirping filled the bridge. He came in and rammed his hand through her chest (wink wink).

Zabuza roared with an animalistic rage when he saw his apprentice get impaled. He resumed his fight with Naruto with an even higher bloodlust. Naruto was getting pounded. The toll of taking two tails was finally showing itself and he was feeling it. Plus, a rampaging demon is not something that you want to be fighting when your body is destroying itself every second. In a last ditch attempt, he also charged Zabuza and packed all his chakra into a single punch. It made contact and sent Zabuza across the bridge, right into Gatoo's feet. (2)

"I knew a worthless maggot like you wouldn't be able to take down a bunch of kids!" yelled Gatoo as he kicked Zabuza in the face. Behind him stood hundreds of mercenaries. Each had the strength of Chunin.

Zabuza got back up and turned to Gatoo. He still had the demonic look in his eye as he spoke, "I'll give you five seconds to run. Five." Gatoo looked strangely at him, he would challenge this army? "Four." He began to turn. "Three." He moved behind the army. "Two." He ordered the army to attack. "One." He blurred out of sight and appeared in front of Gatoo. The part of the army he ran through suddenly stopped moving. Being in two pieces didn't help. "Zero." He easily lopped off the head of the fat man. He turned around to face the army. They all attacked, sending kunai, shurinken, and even spears. He parried them all with his sword. He charged in for a melee fight. The demonic chakra controlled his movements through the massacre.

To onlookers it was beautiful. The grace that Zabuza moved with reviled dancers. The sword looked like an extension of his arm and nothing else. Also, the demonic force he put into his attacked showed why he was called demon of the mist. _So that's what I was fighting..._ Years of experienced helped Zabuza finish them off without taking any damage. When he finished, he cleaned his sword with a water jutsu and turned to leave. "So that's it? You're just going to leave your partner and the battle?" called out Naruto. Anger was clearly getting to him. _Kuso I was just beginning to respect this man._

Zabuza turned around, tears in his eyes. His voice was choked up as he spoke, "Really ninja don't show emotion. Y... you obviously failed you lessons." He gave a solemn look to the 'dead' Haku. It started to snow as he began again, "that kid was the only person I ever could have called a friend. All my other ones were killed by my hand. Now I'm not getting paid, Haku is dead, and I have the blood of a hundred more men on my hands. I'm going to call today a lost battle and move on in life."

A cough from the 'dead' Haku caught the attention of everyone present. Zabuza rushed to her side. She was bleeding badly and he could tell she would die soon. Naruto also approached and examined the wound. Noticing her life leaving quickly, he hast a low rank healing jutsu on her. He put as much chakra as he could inside it and it healed almost instantly. The toll of the fight and using that much chakra so fast thoroughly knocked him out cold. Zabuza smiled at the gaki wa sega hikui desu (3). He earned his respect and wished to fight him again. Picking up Haku, he fought off the last of the demonic chakra's control and carried her back home.

Kakashi assessed the situation. Sasuke was dead, Sakura looked ready to kill her self, Naruto was hanging onto the last strings of life, and hundreds of mangled body parts were scattered across the bridge. He sighed as he left to go pick up Sasuke. He removed he needle and noticed a particular thing happen, blood poured out with it. Now, when you are dead, your heart stops beating. When your heart doesn't beat, blood doesn't circulate through the body. When you have a cut with no circulation of blood, only the fluids present to the location release. However, this peculiar cut was bleeding. He checked the pulse and found one, even if it was weak.

He informed Sakura and she cheered, ranting on about how Sasuke-sama was invincible and can escape death just to be with her.

As for Naruto, he was currently getting a confident boost inside the seal. "**You no good lazy ass! You saved the life of the enemy and put yourself on the border of death. My great grandma can fight better than you." **Oh yes, his ego will sure feel that. "**And you even missed my declaration you ASS! You could have at least stayed conscious for two more bloody seconds!**"

He looked at her strangely, "What declaration?" She suddenly realized what she said and blushed. She told him it was nothing and he just gave her a suspicious look.

Kakashi carried both Naruto and Sasuke back to the village with Sakura in toll. A coworker went up to Tazuna and asked, "When we finish this, what should we call it?"

Tazuna answered without a doubt, "The Great Naruto Bridge, based after the only frosty bastard with a heart."

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(1)A Zangaiko can do three things, get smaller for a bigger boom, self destruct, and shoot fire out their hands which I'm calling a fire blast.

(2) Gatoo in Hiragana is spelt Gatou, but in Japanese writing, a double 'o' is spelt as a u. The real way is Gatoo so that's what I'm going to use. If you have to make Romaji EXACTLY like Hiragana, tell me I'm I'll think of changing it to that.

(3) Did I use the right 'small'? Chisai isn't used for human height.

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And that's all for chappy three.

Sab-Zero879: well... that was the best waste of time ever. Alright, I finally forced my self to work on this chapter this week. It took me seven days of lazy work to finish this, and will probably take Churro two days to edit.

Churro: Hey give me some slack! I'm sorry that I don't have the ever so perfect Microsoft word spell checker or some dictionary. A two year old has better grammar than you!

Sub-zero879: Just because that's true doesn't mean...

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Omake omake omake omake omake omake omake omake omake omake omake!

Kiba liked the idea and was about to go down to the class room, when his ear was grabbed and a female voice said, "Nope, you're going home." They turned around and saw Hana. Naruto could've sworn that her vest was zipped down even farther. He saw her looking at him through the corner of her eye, "Like what you see, Uzumaki?" He didn't answer as he kept his eyes locked on her chest. "Want to see more?" He slowly nodded, not focusing on the present.

She complied and Naruto was able to behold half the glory that is Hana. Suddenly Kyuubi appeared next to Kiba and covered his eyes, "Now now Kiba, you're too young to look at your sister that way."


	4. Smile

Reviews: (I do these by question/comment now)

**Zomg! Lee wears shit!**

_Real mature people. I forgot the r in shirt, I'm sorry that it brings out your inner gaki. _

**kagekitsune49**(sigh I'm do specific now)

_The shit thing was a typo. As for the Hedge/Henge, I've already been told of this. I thought it was Hedge at first, but as people told me I went back and I thought I fixed all of it. I'm sorry that there are some I missed. (Same for Shin-Obi/Shinobi) For Kyuubi not dieing from going outside the seal, think of it this way: people make stories where Kyuubi can come out as a Kage Bunshin. I make Kyuubi come out as solid chakra. The only difference is that it's not a Kage Bunshin. For why she didn't die, I roughly quote "If I release you, you will eventual die of chakra exhaustion seeing as how you won't be able to make your own." Naruto didn't release her, just manifested her conscious in a body of one tail's worth of chakra. The chakra of the one tail ran out, she returned. She was NOT released. As for why she attacked him, the third chapter explains why. When Naruto goes camping with Lee, Naruto goes into the seal demanding an explanation. He gets his answer. As a side note, KyuuNaru-ness is not a word. FemKyuuNaru-ness is! Doomo Arigatoo Gozaimasu for the review._

**Sdarian:**

_Dear god, I don't want to have to do this. How the hell can you not figure this out? Sigh... Kyuubi IS a GIRL! Naruto THINKS Kyuubi is a GUY. When Naruto SPEAKS he refers to Kyuubi as a GUY. If you don't figure it out from that, I don't know what to say. As for the Gatoo translation thing, read __**Fun Fact Number 4 **__in my profile. That's the honest to god truth about translating things._

_**Important**__**-**_ I have a forum up. You can find it in my profile. IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS AND WANT ANSWERS QUICKLY, ASK ME THERE. As a side note, if you just want to make simple chat, you can do that too.

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Ice that Fuels Fire: A New Hope Brings a Smile

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Read the important above. To say the Hokage was shocked would be a grotesque understatement. On their travels, they fought not only THE Zabuza, but also came in contact with the overlord Gatoo, one of the most wanted men on the planet. To top that, Naruto had used his second tail of Kyuubi. Then Naruto pulls off saving the life of some girl who was mortally wounded, showing his knowledge in medical Jutsu. _Maybe I should promote him to ANBU, _the Hokage mused, staring at the man in question through his little ball. He then smiled to himself, _but then again where's the fun in that? Nothing like bragging to everyone during the Chuunin Exam that we have the best shinobi._

Naruto dodges another kick by Lee, gasping for breath. He barely had time to duck from an incoming kunai thrown by Tenten. His two opponents were looking even worse than him, and that's saying something for Lee. Neji just sat indifferently against a tree, trying to ignore them. Of course, that plan seemed to fail has he had to duck under the dodged kunai. He got up and left to his own private clearing.

Naruto jumped back into the Taijutsu battle with Lee, all the while memorizing different ways to counter the incoming attacks. Lee was a different person altogether, he seemed to make up a new move in every set.

Lee smirked, despite his obvious fatigue. He was quite the Taijutsu master. During fights, he would observe, absorb, and use his opponents' stance and moves. He would take the strengths of his opponents' fighting style and absorb it into his own. Naruto was different though; he would study his opponents' fighting style and find different ways to counter it. Thus their two fighting techniques made them into quite the show. Neither could gain the upper hand and it just came down to endurance. In that prospective, both were god-like.

Naruto had asked their team to help him train. Lee and him would engage into a Taijutsu battle, with Tenten keeping him on his feet in between the sets by throwing a few of her weapons. This also helped strengthen the teamwork of that team. It was too bad Neji felt that he was too good to train with them and left to do his own thing (Naruto will knock him down a few pegs in the Chuunin Exam, just like the Anime).

Tenten shouted a warning to Lee, and he jumped back. She pulled out her two scrolls and did her weapon barrage. Naruto then blurred through with his new duel wielding kunai style to parry and block them (from what I've seen the shinobi only use one, with the other hand used for things like smoke bomb, scrolls, and throwing shurinken). He got a few cuts but came out ok. Giving Naruto no time to recover, Lee charged back in for another attack.

Naruto was at his limit, and he knew it. _**Want me to help?**_ asked the Kyuubi. _No, I need to see MY limit, _came the weary reply. After five more minutes of the intense Taijutsu and weapon dodging (does the long range have a name?), Naruto collapsed. A clap came from the side. Naruto groaned and wearily got up to see who the new comer was. He saw that it was Kakashi.

_At another place at around the same time..._

Kurenai looked at her team and gave a big smile, "Congratulations, I happily report to you-"

_With Asuma's team..._

"-that you have been appointed for the Chuunin Exams!" Ino shrieked in excitement, Chouji recommended that they go eat to celebrate, and Shikamaru gave a little smile.

_Now back to Kakashi..._

"Not interested," came the dry remark of the blond tank.

"Eh?" Kakashi was shocked, he though that Naruto would be thrilled to move on to bigger and better things. Even Kyuubi made her confusion known, _**What the hell do you mean 'not interested'?**_

Naruto sighed, "The team isn't ready yet. Also, Orochimaru's new sound village is sure to cause some sort of problems. I think it's best to sit this one out." The answer didn't seem to be enough for Kyuubi as she remarked, _**doesn't that mean all the more reason to enter it? We can crush the snake-bastards pride when he sees that his precious shinobi were defeated by Konoha's.**__ That's not it,_ Naruto sighed, _Orochimaru is planning something, and I can't let the exam distract me or waste my energy. I can feel it, death himself is on his way here, and he is going to make quite the entrance. (1)_

_Sometime later..._

Sasuke hit Naruto in the face, "What the hell are you thinking! You aren't the only one on this team, Sakura and I both want to take it and we need a three man team. Stop thinking about yourself for once!" Naruto could have easily dodged the hit, but his mind just wouldn't let him.

"Look whose talking. You aren't thinking of anyone but yourself. You only want to get stronger to kill Itachi. You're letting your rage consume you and now here you are, shouting like a kid who can't get a new toy. Sort your thoughts out and rethink what happened on that night. It doesn't take someone with an IQ of 200-" Shikamaru sneezes somewhere "-to find out that some thing else was happening back then.

"On the other note, I didn't accept the exam because there isn't going to be one. The exam is being used as a cover up, and from what I've found out, we are going to need as much strength as possible."

Sasuke glared at Naruto, "What do you mean there is something else going on? What did you find out?"

Naruto sighed before conjuring up the memory, "About two months ago..."

_Flashy: two months ago..._

_Naruto was training, still in the academy, when he heard a footstep. He saw a man walk into his clearing. He could sense Genin level chakra in the man. The man was looking around, taking in as much scenery as he could. Naruto saw a music symbol on the man's headband. The man saw him and he gasped before rushing in with the intent to kill. Naruto jumped back, easily dodging the clumsy man's kunai. He grunted from the landing, gravity seals taking their toll. The man charged in again. Naruto, instead of jumping back, rushed in and hit a pressure point on his exposed neck, paralyzing the man._

_Naruto then began to scan the guy's mind with a Jutsu not unlike Ino's. He saw the guy's memories and thoughts before he found what he was looking for:_

'_I kneeled before Orochimaru-sama. This great man, if not a bit feminine, has accepted me into his marvelous village and agreed to take me on as a shinobi. I promised him I would work hard._

_It's been three months since I joined the village, and things are much better since my family was murdered. I was finally told of the plan to take over Konoha. He told me to scout the village landscape out and look for convenient hiding locations. I will not fail him. Before I left, he called out something. Something about a fake Chuunin Exam being held in Konoha. He will tell me when I get back.' (2)_

_End flashy..._

Sasuke didn't know what to say. He finally got up and yelled, "That's it! So you just 'looked inside the mind' of some guy an read a diary-like thought pattern and figure that you shouldn't go to the Chuunin Exam because of it? You're even stupider than I thought." He stormed off somewhere, most likely to brood more about his life.

Naruto sighed, _If only you knew Sasuke, if only you knew._

_With Sasuke..._

_Stupid Naruto and his damn selfishness. Like he can actually look inside someone's mind._ Sasuke sat down on a rock in the middle of the forest and began to meditate on the night his life changed.

_I was coming home, at around eight. I saw smoke and death. Rushing to my home I found the bodies of my parents. I saw him, my brother, the bane of my existence. He was laughing... laughing like nothing wrong had happened. He turned to me, his grin never leaving his face. His elite sharingan held a serpent-like look in it. He told me he killed everyone. I charged, he hit me in the chest. I flew back in pain. He laughed again. He did something... a Genjutsu I think... called... Tsukuyomi. I spent hours watching my family be murdered, or was it seconds? He left, told me that in order to gain power I must hate and detest him, that I must live in an unsightly way. He left and I fell. The sun was rising, but I was falling unconscious. Then I woke up in the- WAIT A SECOND. The sun was rising. Time wise, came at 8, fifteen minutes of searching so 8:15. We talked for 5 min so 8:20. Then Tsukuyomi, one second (_he didn't do days of torture to Sasuke_). Then I ran for 5 minutes and we talked for another 5 so 8:30. Then he left, but there was a sunrise... If Tsukuyomi actually last hours then it should be around 5:45, when sunrise DOES happen. From the scrolls though, the caster decides the time. He needed to get out of the village; he wouldn't stall for that long. He also didn't inflict any pain on me, and I could move. All he did was mental trauma, just like a normal Genjutsu. Maybe something else did happen there..._ (3)

As Naruto walked home, an ANBU dropped down in front of him. Naruto briefly tensed, the image of what happened to Masa replaying in his mind. The man was in the regular ANBU armor with a bird mask on. He spoke, "Hokage-sama wishes to see you immediately." He then disappeared, allowing Naruto to relax slightly.

Sarutobi was reading a little book called For Men: The Shinobi Life 3 when Naruto entered. Naruto raised an eyebrow, "Enjoying that?"

Sarutobi looked up, startled, and grinned in embarrassment, "Hai, this... Aino Masa is a brilliant writer." He set the book into the old Icha Icha Paradise compartment.

"You think so? I personally never read his work. It's too bad he died before I was even 8," Naruto said, nonchalantly. Of course, talking about Naruto's second friend used to hurt him internally, but he has long gotten over his death.

Sarutobi's eyes shot up, "What?! This book was released a week ago!"

The look on his face was priceless to Naruto. _Thousand Ryu says I can knock him out without my Jutsu_, Naruto said to his burden.

_**Done,**_ the voice of Kyuubi rumbled through his head.

Naruto pulled out the book he was working on, For Men: The Shinobi Life 4. "And I plan on releasing this one by Friday."

The mighty Hokage was getting a little dizzy. "But- but that means that _you_ wrote this!" The shock being too much on the old man's heart, his mind began to shut down. His last thought was, _Two out of four of my students turned out to be famous, perverted novel writers. What a winning streak._

Naruto sent an amused feeling to Kyuubi through their link as he said, _Cough it up_

_**You're joking right? Yah, I'll just pull a thousand Ryu out of my fur, give me a sec.**_

Naruto sent another amused feeling to Kyuubi, _then teach me something that goes... boom._

Kyuubi's eyes narrowed, _**you've been planning this all along, haven't you?**_

_Yep._

_**Ass. Alright, first find out what the Hokage wanted to say to you then go into the forest.**_ Naruto nudged the corpse on the floor. He did it again.

Sarutobi suddenly jumped up, "I wasn't reading it I swear! Oh, just you Naruto. Did you want something?"

"I should be asking you that. You called me here about thirty minutes ago," Naruto answered with a bored look on his face.

The Sandaime grew a thinking look on his face before recognition came and he said, "Right! I wanted to tell you that you are being promoted to ANBU."

Unease swept through Naruto. ANBU, the group he hated most. Naruto becoming ANBU? Yah right. Then again, it was just another rank. The ones he hated were all dead. Advancing to a rank that high would be very promising. His dream flashed through his head and he avoided giving a solid answer, "What's the condition?"

Sarutobi took a long drag of his pipe before answering, "You have to be Chuunin minimum in order to become ANBU."

Naruto frowned, "The Chuunin exams are fake; I told you this."

The Hokage gave a secretive smile, "That's not entirely true. However it ends with Orochimaru's appearance, it will still be a Chuunin exam. You are very capable of becoming a Chuunin from entering."

Naruto put his hands under his chin and closed his eyes in deep thought. It made him look much older than he really was. He became a dead copy of the Yondaime when he sat that way. Naruto's eyes snapped open as he came to an answer, breaking off Sarutobi's memories of the past. "I'll do it."

_The Next Day..._

Sasuke frowned, definitely not pleased. Sakura was completely surprised, but she didn't say a thing. Kakashi narrowed his eyes, not trusting the person in front of him. Naruto scratched his head in confusion, "What?"

Now Sasuke narrowed his eyes, "You _know_ what."

Naruto tapped his chin in thought, acting like he didn't have a clue, but on the inside he was smirking. "I only said that I'll go to the Chuunin exams..."

Sasuke growled in frustration, "Exactly! Yesterday you said there wasn't going to be an exam, and today you say you're going to compete in it! You tell us _what_!" Sakura nodded her head in agreement. Kakashi's eyes didn't soften.

Naruto waved him off, "Just a change in the wind." He began to walk away.

Kakashi's voice stopped him dead, "Teammates... comrades... _friends_... they don't keep secrets from each other. If you keep secrets, that makes it hard to trust you. Without trust, we will fall apart in missions."

Naruto turned around slowly with a heavy glare, "The _truth_!? What about the secret you all kept from me? How about hiding the fact on _why _the _hell_ I got beat as a child?" Naruto suddenly calmed down, cold exterior taking over; it consumed all emotions. "If that is something that can be kept a secret from a... _comrade_ than so are my reasons." He continued walking away.

"_HELP ME! PLEASE! AAAAAH!"_

Kakashi lowered his eye in shame, clearly defeated in this argument. Sasuke and Sakura turned to him for an explanation. Kakashi shook his head, contradicting his earlier point on trust.

"_OH GOD! IT HURTS! PLEASE! SOMEONE HELP ME!" Blue eyes were full of fear and pain, anguished tears leaked from the eyes. The eyes of a child._

Sasuke clenched his hands in fury, not entirely at the secrecy going on. He remembered his first meeting with the blond, specifically when he was getting beat on by a bunch of Uchiha. What kind of childhood did he have?

"_Please mister mask person! They are going to hurt me more! Help me please!" The small child tugged on the uniform of an ANBU. The man stood solid as the villagers grabbed the child and continued their 'divine retribution.'_

Sakura sat there with a thoughtful look on her face. She accessed the situation in her head before giving up. She sighed, "Some things aren't meant for us to know."

"_OH GOD! PLEASE MISTER MASK PERSON! IT HURTS SO BAD!" The man just stood there with a passive look on his face. He just watched the child get beaten._

Kakashi turned his back on his two students and began to walk away. He headed towards the memorial stone. He couldn't help but feel like a wedge had begun to form between the students on his team. Once he arrived at the stone he looked at the names of his long forgotten comrades... his past friends. _Otoosan... Obito... Rin... Arashi-Sensei... have I failed as a teacher?_

_Flashback..._

_Four year old Naruto ran through the town as fast as he could. His demon enhanced endurance allowed him to keep away from them for this long, but it was running out fast. He gave a sigh of happiness when he saw one of the masked ninja. The Old Man told him that the masked people were there to help and protect him._

"_Please mister mask person! They are going to hurt me more! Help me please!" Naruto tugged on the uniform of the ANBU. The man gave no indication of moving. He stood solid as the villagers grabbed the child and continued their beatings. Naruto cried as the older people just hammered into his frail body. "OH GOD! PLEASE MISTER MASK PERSON! IT HURTS SO BAD!" The ANBU just stood there with a passive look, barely noticeable behind the mask. He gave no indication of helping as he watched the child get beaten._

_Kakashi approached his superior from the shadow he was hiding in, "Sir! We are supposed to protect the child!" He just couldn't stand there and watch a kid get beaten. Demon be damned, it was still just a kid._

_The squad leader didn't even glance at Kakashi as he spoke, "Hanasanai! I give the orders here. Besides, he will live." His face slightly broke into a smile on a loud squeal from the blond as his arm was broken._

"_HELP ME! PLEASE! AAAAAH!"_

_Kakashi shook his head. The leader had lost his wife, children, and his sister from the Kyuubi attack. Because of that he let the beatings continue for this long, but enough was enough. Kakashi was willing to place his life in a seal created by the Yondaime Hokage, his sensei. He had no doubt that the seal would hold the real demon in check._

"_OH GOD! IT HURTS! PLEASE! SOMEONE HELP ME!"_

_Kakashi growled, "You disgust me!" He hit his leader in the temple, sending the man away and leaving him unconscious... or dead. Either way he didn't get up. Kakashi removed his mask, letting the white dog face hit the ground with a dull thump. He rushed in and 'kindly escorted' the attackers away from the child. He picked up the crying blond and carried him to the hospital. He got the few doctors who didn't hate the blond to heal him._

Kakashi let a lone tear fall from his eye. It slowly descended, taking miscellaneous shapes before landing with a soft drip sound on the memorial stone. It fell on one name in particular.

_Kazama Arashi, Yondaime Hokage – Seal expert, a man who never allowed himself to lose, and best of all a friend to all._

Kakashi traced his finger around the man's name. He gave a deep sigh before tearing his eyes away from the stone. He began to head back to the Hokage tower to turn in the applications for the Chuunin exams.

Naruto sat on his balcony and stared out on the slums of Konoha. He wasn't particularly interested in anything out there, but the scene brought back many painful memories. Naruto wasn't one to brood or get lost in the past, so he shook his head to clear the dark thoughts and got up.

With a sudden memory, he said to the 'cause of his pain,' _you still need to teach me the technique you promised._

Kyuubi gave a huff in response, **You **_**didn't go into the forest as requested. It's your fault**_ Naruto sent amusement over the link, _sounds to me like _you_ forgot. The great Kyuubi no Kitsune, the most cunning demon in existence, forgot all about his training lesson._ Kyuubi cried fake tears, _**Now that's just harsh.**_ Only more amusement was her answer.

Naruto went into a clearing somewhere in the forest of Konoha, the full moon being his only source of light. His shirt was off because it restricted his movement and it became to hot if he had it on while he worked out. He was only clothed in his black pants and matching sandals. He was in meditative position as he waited for Kyuubi.

_Mindscape..._

Naruto was resting in the shade on a tree inside his mind. It really made him look much different than before. He didn't look like the dark bundle of painful memories. He looked more like the innocent child he should have been, yet at the same time he held a look of maturity. Kyuubi found it to be cute, before she violently shook her head clear of that thought. He was her _jailer_ after all.

"**Alright!**" She barked, catching the attention of the blond. "**This is going to be a very special technique. You see, every demon has its own special technique. I'm going to teach you mine.**" She gave a feral grin that promised much pain.

_Time-skip of many things that weren't interesting... (heh heh)_

Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto were all in front of Kakashi before the door leading to the first exam for the Chuunin exams. Kakashi gave them all a serious eye, "I want you all to remember something, you are a team and will need each others help to pass these exams. That means no more lone wolves-" critical eye on Sasuke and Naruto "-and no more obsessing over a single teammate." Now its Sakura's turn. Suddenly his cold glare turned into a smiling eye as he said, "Well good luck. And here's a tip, help each other get as far as possible. You will find it very useful to have teammates. Jyaane (see you later)." He poofed away.

As one, the three pushed opened the door and entered their first exam.

Right when they entered, they saw many other Genin in a cramped hallway. They shoved their way forward until they reached a door being blocked by two Chuunin. Within a fraction of a second, Naruto analyzed the situation's problems and solved them. He gave a nudge to Sasuke as a hint that he knew what to do. Sasuke did a mock bow as if to say 'you do the honors.'

Naruto waved to the pair, "Konichiwa, Izumo-san, Kotetsu-san. Was Sarutobi really that serious about demoting you two into Chuunin?"

The Chuunin gawked at their part-time 'little brother,' completely forgetting that they showed him their 'Chuunin Forms' all those years back. The two Jonin suddenly regained their composure and whispered to him, "Otooto-kun, don't blow our cover here."

Naruto just whispered back to him, "I know, I don't even want to think about what Ibiki would do if these petty kids, who can't even see through that pathetic Genjutsu, walked into his classroom." The two gave a nod of understanding before allowing team 7 in. They held the rest out.

Once in the real room, Sakura turned to Naruto, "How did you figure out that wasn't the room?"

Naruto replied off-handedly, "I know for a fact way more Genin applied for this exam, and that the hallway wasn't big enough for all of them. That was my hint that something was wrong. So from there, I checked where we were supposed to be and where we were. I saw the pathetic Genjutsu and dispelled it for just myself. I told the guards that I knew and they let us in. Sasuke, on the other hand, can see right through Genjutsu with his Sharingan." He coughed under his breath, "Cheater." Sasuke's eye twitched as he heard the last part.

"Of course Sasuke-kun saw through it, he is the greatest after all," a feminine voice called out.

Sakura turned to yell at the newcomer, but Naruto cut her off, not wanting another cat-fight here, "I see the rest of the Rookies made it here. Including Gai's team." He sighed in relief when he noticed he successfully defused the situation. Just then Gai's team walked in. "Oi, Lee!"

"Naruto-kun!" Lee said with excitement. He gave Naruto a pat on the back, "I saw how fast you got in! Your team didn't even need a Byakugan to help you get in."

Naruto returned the gesture to his third 'human friend' (the others being Sarutobi and Itachi). "Well it _was_ a weak Genjutsu. Besides, we all have our own ways on getting in."

Naruto's other 'friends' approached him. It was Kiba who spoke, "Ano... who is he, Naruto?"

Lee puffed out his chest in pride, "Boku no namae wa Rock Lee desu. (My name is Rock Lee.)"

Kiba gasped, as did the rest of the group ('cept for Shino). "Bu-Bu-But Lee had those ginormous eyebrows that could walk, talk, and move on there own, and he was hyperactive, and loud, and sucked at techniques, and did I mention the HUGE eyebrows?"

Lee laughed, pleased with his change in appearance, "Yah, that's me. Naruto helped me improve... A lot." He grinned in an arrogant way, although he had reason to.

Again the group gasped. Naruto _socialized_ with someone, let alone trained them! "Bu-Bu-But Naruto is the quite type, who doesn't do anything, and he stays away from people, and doesn't socialize, and he doesn't talk to strangers, and doesn't help others, and did I mention he's anti-social?"

Naruto's pride took an impaling from a Zanbato. "Hey... I'm not that bad am I?" Everyone, including Hinata, nodded. Naruto bowed his head in shame.

Some grey haired guy holding a stack of cards approached them. He had an irritating smirk as he said, "You-'

"No, I don't like Yu-Gi-O; go away," Naruto interrupted with a glare. Kiba and a few others snickered.

Kabuto's smirk vanished, "That's not what I was going to say. I was going to say 'you-'"

Naruto gasped, "Pokemon! Never! I can't believe someone of your age would do something so childish!" More snickers.

Kabuto yelled, "No damn it! I was going to say people here don't like loud brats!" More snickers.

Naruto feigned curiosity, "Who's the loud one? Oops, looks like they don't like you." He pointed

Kabuto turned around to see everyone glaring at him. He began bashing his head into a hard object, clearly not able to inspire fear into the Genin. With a resigned sigh and a bloody forehead, he said, "Want to see some of my cards." Before anyone could say anything, he quickly said, "It's not a damn card game! They are info cards about just about _anyone_."

Sasuke perked up at this, "Rock Lee, Sabaku no Gaara, and Uzumaki Naruto."

Kabuto read them allowed:

Rock Lee

Age: 13

Sex: Otoko

Village: Konoha

Rank: Genin

Details: No chakra, has both chakra forming storage seals and weight seals, Taijutsu master, knows the Lotus.

Missions:

S: 0

A: 0

B: 0

C: 16

D: 2

Naruto gave Lee a pat on the back for only having 2 D rank missions, and gave a raised eyebrow at the lotus comment. Lee replied with a sheepish grin.

Sabaku no Gaara

Age: 13

Sex: Otoko

Village: Suna

Rank: Genin

Details: Sand as weapon, never been hurt in a mission before, container for Ichibi no Shukaku, kills for fun.

Missions:

S: 0

A: 2

B: 3

C: 9

D: 1

Naruto frowned for two reasons. First, there was another Jinchuuriki in the exam, specifically one that liked killing. Second, his card might reveal that too. He quickly took his own card before Kabuto could read it and burnt it. Kabuto gave a knowing grin to the Jinchuuriki and left when the doors banged open.

"LISTEN UP, MAGGOTS! I'M THIS YEAR'S EXAMINER! IT'S TIME TO SHOW THAT YOU ARE ALL REAL MEN WORTHY OF BEARING THE RANK OF CHUUNIN! HERE WE TAKE THE MOST BRUTAL TEST OF ALL, ONE THAT WILL MAKE THE WEAK HEARTED CRY FOR MERCY. YOU WILL NOW TAKE... A WRITTEN EXAM!" Everyone face faulted.

A pissed Kiba was up first, "The test that makes people cry? Dear god, I was expecting something like 'survive five minutes against seven Jonin' or something difficult."

_A few minutes later..._

"Bring on the Jonin!" Cried the dog-boy as his head smacked into the table. He cried in sorrow as he just... couldn't... get the answers. Suddenly an idea came to him.

Naruto on the other hand was staring at his test with mild curiosity. _Something's not right. He emphasized on cheat a little too much, and he mentioned that you don't lose the first time you get caught, but the fifth. It's almost as if... wow it really took me that long. Then again, there's the tenth question. So part one is information gathering, easy enough, but I think that's just to filter out the filth so the tenth question is actually the test. Hmm... In the meantime, its time to do what all mature people do with a pen, paper, and free time..._ Within seconds, Naruto became the doodle master.

As the test neared the end, Ibiki shouted, "Alright, time for the final question. But first, there is something you must know about it. If you don't accept, you can leave now and your team will fail. If you do take it and you get it wrong, you will never be allowed to become a Chuunin." Whining and people leaving later, he was about to give the question. "Anyone else want to leave? Nothing will be held against you."

Naruto saw Sakura shaking and about to raise her hand. He cursed to himself before standing up, "Who gives a damn about the Chuunin rank? That just means I can't jump rank to ANBU! Even if I stay Genin I'll still make the jump to Jonin!" Inward he was thinking, _stupid pink bitch! Can't you see he was just screwing with you!_

Ibiki smirked, "Since no one else is going to leave... YOU ALL PASS!" More whining and shouting later, he continued, "Sometimes you need to risk more than just your title to do a mission. Someone who is willing to risk their rank to improve has the capability of becoming a Chuunin. And- murph!" A banner suddenly was wrapped around his body.

The banner read 'Second examiner Mitarashi Anko' just then, a woman in a trench coat jumped through the window and gave a bow. When hearing the sounds behind the banner, she saw Ibiki trapped. She gave a nervous laugh as she untied him. When she was done, she waved the people and said, "Hey, I'm your second examiner, the beautiful Mitarashi Anko!"

Naruto commented dryly, "Not to mention serphantine." He was clearly making reference to a certain individual that both hated and were scarred from.

Anko narrowed her eyes at him, "Who are you?"

"Just like you," came the mysterious reply. Before Anko could shout more, he said, "We can talk later if you want, but for now finish your introduction on the second exam.

She gave him a cold glare before reluctantly dropping the subject, "Right, meet at training field 40 tomorrow 1 'o clock sharp." She suddenly shot snakes out of her sleeves and they wrapped around Naruto. "And you are coming with me."

Without warning, the Naruto she was holding burst into smoke, revealing it was a Kage Bunshin. Just then, the door opened, and in came Naruto, pulling up his zipper. When he saw all the stares, he blushed and said, "What? I had to use the restroom..." Everyone face-faulted.

Anko growled, grabbed Naruto, and teleported to her house.

Anko's house was very... different than what he expected. It was relevantly a normal house. Simple yellow walls, windows allowing light to pour in, a few plants, and two pet snakes, each locked into a cage. Naruto looked around in general confusion. Then his eyes fell upon a closed door. Fear crept into his soul and his palms became sweaty. He unconsciously gripped the chair arms tighter as the door paralyzed him in fear.

Anko's voice brought Naruto out of his petrification, "Oh, that's just my bedroom." It all made perfect sense now. "Now about what you said at the exam. Something tells me you have your own personal experience with Orochimaru. Care to share?" She handed him a cup of tea, acting uncharacteristically... normal.

Naruto took a sip before beginning, "In a way, I have a very good reason to..._ hate_ Orochimaru. As a matter of fact, two reasons. I'm not exactly allowed to tell you this, but what the hell, you know the pain he causes." Anko gave a curt nod at that, knowing very well the pain he caused her alone. "The first reason is very private, and I will not tell you it, but I will tell you it involves the Kyuubi."

Anko gripped her teacup tightly, "So he is also the bane of your hell?"

"Only a contributor..." Naruto took another sip before continuing, "This is an S-ranked secret between the Hokage and I, do you really wish to be involved with this?"

Anko took a sip of her tea before answering, "Since it involves..._ him_, go ahead. I want to know what else to curse him for."

Naruto finished his tea before beginning his tale, "October 8, two days before I turned 8, my only friend was ripped away from me, and as a side-effect of that, the only people who showed me any love were slaughtered before my very eyes."

Anko turned her eyes down onto the table, feeling the sorrow radiating off him in waves. "What happened?"

"Orochimaru," Naruto spat out as if it was poison. "He used a Henge to take the shape of Uchiha Itachi." Anko's eyes widened, understanding where this was leading too. She should have remembered by the date alone. "He murdered almost everyone in the Uchiha clan, save Itachi and Sasuke. In the midst of all this, one Uchiha member was able to confront the real Itachi and challenged him to a fight. Itachi accidentally killed the man, who just happened to be his best friend. Itachi gained the final stage of the Sharingan, removing his last chance of innocence. He quickly fled the city in hopes to save himself.

"But that's not all that happened," Naruto suddenly growled out, anger spiking. "That same day, early in the morning, I met a man called Aino Masa." Anko suddenly thought, _I've heard that name somewhere before..._ "Masa-jii-chan had offered me a fresh meal. He showed me so much kindness, along with his wife Sayuri. I had a feeling we would be friends for a long time. Without warning, ANBU infiltrated the house I was in. I quickly escaped into a closet. I heard them talking. I heard them talk about the Kyuubi, and how it was sealed in me. Then they talked about how Itachi had gone rogue. It was so much pain in just those two sentences. I accidentally broke down the door. The ANBU realized the reality of the situation; they broke the Sandaime's law. So they took the law into their own hands has they judged and executed both Masa and Sayuri. They were just going to walk away from that!" He spat. A red glow began to surround him. "They killed an innocent couple and acted like they saved the day! I wanted... iie, _needed_ revenge. I talked to Kyuubi for the first time, demanding his chakra. Even though it was half a tails worth, it was more than enough to inflict my wrath on the petrified assholes."

A lot of things suddenly made sense to Anko. Uchiha situation, the 'mysterious' murder of an entire ANBU squad, the burst of demonic chakra, and the 180 emotional change in the kid when he was 7. She felt for the kid and gave a comforting hand on his shoulder. She then thought of the perfect solution to this situation, "Forget the tea, we need sake... now." She went into the kitchen and came back with two large bottles. She popped the cap off and handed one to Naruto. "Trust me kid, after all the shit I've been through, this has been the best way to get through the roughest times."

Naruto suddenly laughed in his depressed state. It felt strange to him, but it came so naturally. The entire situation, the emotion ups 'n downs, the drama packed into this single meeting, and the greatest solution. He felt so overwhelmed, the he just laughed. Anko stared strangely at him, before laughing herself. They laughed for a bit, and when it was over, Naruto smiled his first smile in SIX years. They both took the sake bottles, and with a call of "KANPAI!" they downed them.

_Elsewhere..._

Ibiki was currently grading the test from the written exam, despite the fact that the grade didn't matter. He found three papers of interest. The first had the following sentence repeated for every question 'I love Sasuke-sama'. The second read 'Itachi must die'. The third showed strange pictures. Some were of the Nuke-nin Uchiha Itachi, some of some weird shark-man, and some where of foxes. He glanced strangely at the papers, before realizing something. With anger he shouted, "TEAM SEVEN! HOW DARE YOU IGNORE THE WRITTEN EXAM?" He sighed when he noticed no one was there to hear him. He thought back to the declaration of the blond. He noticed that it was forced, to give encouragement to his teammates, yet he also felt the truth behind the words. "Uzumaki Naruto ka. Tanoshii ne..."(4)

_Next morning..._

Pain didn't describe what Naruto felt as he woke up. More like 'lightning bolt traveling through jackhammer on head.' He gave a deep groan as he tried o figure out what situation he was in. But first, he had to get rid of this damn headache! Kyuubi's voice only made it worse, _**BAKA! You have hangover now!**_ He clenched his eyes together in pain, before hearing her sigh and say, _**Alright... I'll tone down the pain.**_ Almost instantly, the hangover went away.

Naruto opened his eyes to see exactly where he was. He gulped in fear when he saw where. It was only told in legion, in the most secretive and fearful voices. The most battle hardened men were willing to commit seppuku before entering the damned hell. The ones that ventured there never came back the same. Some had smiles, but they held darker gleans in their eyes. The others were just blabbering fools who gained an overwhelming fear of snakes. All of them were covered with fresh battle wounds. Slash marks as long as twenty centimeters would be found along there bodies. Naruto made a promise to never venture within 100 meters of the cursed land, yet here he was, smack-down in the middle of it.

Naruto suddenly went white as a ghost when he noticed the keeper of the land press against him. Unable to hold his terror in any longer, he bolted for the door, waking the keeper. He noticed to his raising fear that the door was locked. He saw a window and dived at inhuman speeds for that. He found that also to be locked. He decided to break through it, but found bars covering the glass, preventing escape that way. He heard the keeper make noise, "UGHHH..."

The hairs in the back of Naruto's neck rose. Pulling on the strongest emotion mask he had, he turned around to face his fears. He heard the keeper moan in agony, like a tortured soul, calling for him. The keeper's eyes opened and it looked dead at the frightened Jinchuuriki. It spoke, "Ugh... Naruto-kun, get me some sake, this hangover is a beast."

"S-Su-Sure th-thing A-Anko, just don't kill me," he desperately searched the room for anything with alcohol. He found a bottle of sake and handed it to her, which she drank greedily.

When she finished, she had the ability to make out her surroundings. They were in Hell aka Anko's room. To the amazement of Anko, they both were dressed, even after they got drunk. She could briefly remember that they had been laughing, smile, and all around having a good time. Trying harder, she remembered dragging him into her bedroom and then passing out on the bed. She gave a weak grin, "So I guess it was just a fun night, not a wild one."

Naruto looked down and noticed everything was attached, "And I thank god for that."

Anko pouted cutely, "I'm not that bad am I?"

"In this room, you are." She grinned. She then pulled out her keys and unlocked the door.

She guided him to the table and began making breakfast. The two ate together and just talked about different ways they were hoping to kill/maim/dismember Orochimaru. With just that night together, the two became good friends.

As Naruto began to leave the house, she called out to him, "If you ever need to talk, or want a one-night stand, you know where to go!" He could just _hear_ the perverted grin she had, even without looking at her.

With a grin of his own, he called out, "I'll remember that!"

Once Naruto was gone from sight, she put on a genuine smile. Yes, those two would defiantly be friends. She was about to go back inside when Naruto came running back to her. As a little joke, she said, "You want that one-night stand already?" Noticing his _slightly_ panicked face, she became curious.

"Anko-chan, its 1:30," Naruto said, slightly out of breath. Apparently the two slept in late.

Anko cocked her head to the side, "What does tha- OH SHIT!"

Together they said, "WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE!"

The quickly loaded on the supplies they needed and rushed to training field 40 together.

* * *

_(1) Alright this is SYMBOLIZIM. Last time I used this in a story, I got a review asking if Death will be wearing a black hood._

_(2) This is the reason why Naruto knows so much about people. It doesn't cause pain and you don't notice it's on you. The only problem is, is that it leaves your body vacant like Ino's Jutsu._

_(3) Just about all that is true. Although on the sunrise part, I remembered it from watching it before. I rewatched the massacre, which was hard because it's split up into different sections like the Inn with Itachi and Kisame and the Sasuke/Naruto fight. Can't remember if I saw it there. I'm pretty sure it's in the wave arc when Sasuke 'dies' when he has a flash back, but I don't have those episodes so I can't be sure._

_(4) 'Uzumaki Naruto, huh? How interesting...' For some reason, this phrase just _sounds_ better in Japanese. 'specially the first part._

* * *

Sub-Zero879: I have returned!

Returned879: ...That's copy-righted.

Churro: Don't make me kick you out of the house (box) again.

Returned879: NO! NOT AGAIN! I JUST RETURNED!

Sub-Zero879: Now that I think about it, you stole my numbers didn't you?

Returned879: N-No...

* * *

OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE (This is not taken from Naruto Abridge and translated into Ranma goodness)

Dozo just missed hitting Kabuto in the face, leaving said man vomiting on the floor. Ibiki poofed into the room and shouted, "ENOUGH OF THIS PANSY FIGHTING EACH OTHER CRAP! IT'S TIME TO MAKE YOU INTO REAL MEN AND MAKE YOU TAKE... A WRITTEN TEST!"

Somewhere in the crowd a girl yelled, "But I'm a girl!"

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Pausing, he addressed the crowd, "NOW, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO ANSWER TEN TRIVIA QUESTIONS ON THE ANIME RANMA ½! IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN RANMA ½, TOUGH (beep)!"

After everyone was seated, he continued, "NOW, IN ORDER TO PASS THIS TEST YOU NEED TO GET AT LEAST ONE QUESTION RIGHT! AND DON'T LET US CATCH YOU CHEATING! Wink wink catch wink wink cheating."

A random guy shouted out, "I don't get it!"

"GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE! Anyone have a question that's not bathed in stupid?"

Out of nowhere, a voice shouted, "SasuNaru forever!"

"GET. OUT. AND LATER, OUTSIDE... YOU'RE MINE!" Not comforting knowing that came from a top interrogator/torturer. "BEGIN!"

Temari thought to herself, _good thing Gaara likes that anime..._

Sasuke thought with horror, _I don't flaming know what Ryoga's catch phrase is!_

Naruto gave a depressed glance at his paper, _I only read the manga. ah man..._

And so everyone used their powers to help with cheating. Remember kids, cheating is good... as long as you don't get caught. (Sub-Zero879, Returned879, and Churro and not responsible for supporting the victimless crime of cheating.)(Ok, maybe a little.)

"OH YA, AND THERE'S A TENTH QUESTION. A QUESTION SO HARD IT WILL TEST YOUR VERY SOUL. IF YOU GET THIS QUESTION RIGHT, WE AWARD YOU 50 THOUSAND POINTS! IF YOU GET THE QUESTION WRONG, NOT ONLY DO YOU FAIL, BUT WE'LL MAKE YOU WATCH SUPER MILK CHAN AND ENGLISH DUBBED NARUTO... AT THE SAME TIME!"

Faster than one could blink people were leaving, "I'm out!" "Screw this!" "I'M OUTA HERE!" "Me too!" "Screw that, I'm outa here!" "I want my mommie!"

Once they were gone, Ibiki spoke again, "And the question is... (drum roll please) do you want... to pass this test?"

Naruto raised his hand nervously, "Um, Yes?"

"Congratulations, you all pass!"

"Wait, what the hell? What just happened?" Naruto yelled.

Ibiki turned serious, "Hey, taking a written test is no laughing matter. One time on a mission while me and my friend were information gathering, we were captured and they said if I didn't tell them the circumference of my friend's cape and do it in my head, they would kill him. AND I COULDN'T DO IT, SO THEY KILLED HIM!" He broke down into tears.

Kankuro cried out, "Uncle Jimmy!"

"Oh will you shut up Kankuro?" Ibiki shouted, clearly over his shock. "And now someone who is much sexier than me, Anko!"

Anko appeared, "Thanks Ibiki, and now for the second exam. Oh wait, just kidding, that's next time. Bye!"


	5. Forest of Dangers

**Darkwill0w:** Heh, it's kind of funny: I was an atheist when I wrote that. I was just using that as an excuse because I was getting sick and tired of all the yaoi spam on this sight. That was… three(?) years ago. Now I actually am a Christian. It's funny though, that I decided to be a Christian yet you call it not being able to decide for myself. And, that was only a quick tidbit at the very end of the request, yet you're acting like the whole thing was zealotry. Oh well, I may be falling for the "lies of religion" now (despite the actual logic I saw when I converted), but I'd rather be a Christian and be wrong than an atheist and be wrong. That would just suck… royally. At least you left a signed review; that takes a certain courage I respect.

**Altra Ventus:** I know you probably meant to insult with that, but I lol'd. I guess I'm just a fan of sarcasm.

Alright, crack down time. True to my word, I'll write this in seven days, and for some reason I'm on day two... No, I didn't skip a couple of days of writing to watch Heroes and The Office. No, I'm not lying! Seriously!

Hah well, this is roughly four months after I wrote the thing above, and um… Heh. Lol.

Also, you may notice I write differently. I've written this story over the years. You should notice my (hopefully) progress. Also, there should be much less mistakes. As I read through it, I found so many mistakes I was disgusted at myself. I'm going to have to re-write this some time. And as I said, I know my writing is different. I can feel it. It's more serious; more story, less parody. I hope you all still get some laughs.

_**Stupid people read this:**_ Kyuubi is a girl, a woman, a female. She has boobs and everything. HOWEVER, Naruto THINKS Kyuubi is a guy. He is mistaken and will find out shortly. That means he will call Kyuubi things like 'he' and 'him.'

----------------Merry Christmas people-----------------

Sasuke and Sakura were at training field 40, looking for their late teammate. He was already 45 minutes late and there was no sight of him. Sasuke reclined on a rock with his eyes closed while Sakura stood looking for Naruto. Sakura approached Sasuke, trying to strike up a conversation with him. "Hey Sasuke..."

"No," Sasuke cut in without opening his eyes.

"But you don't even know what I'm going to ask," Sakura tried to reason. Hearing no reply, she assumed she had the go-ahead to ask, "Do you know where Naruto is?" Sasuke opened his eyes and glared at her. After a few seconds, she finally got it. "Oh... When do you think he will get here?"

Sasuke closed his eyes. "When the examiner gets here. That's just how he is."

"But-" Sakura stopped herself short. Her ears caught something. It sounded like Naruto. She squinted into the distance, where she saw two forms approaching. Her eyes grew wide when she could make out more details. Sasuke opened his eyes again at Sakura's silence. That wasn't something natural. He followed her gaze and stopped short, his body and mind freezing over.

Naruto was strolling in with the examiner, acting like they've been buddies for their whole life. But the part that stuck out to them was Naruto's _smile._ He was _smiling_ and talking casual. He even laughed at one point. Sakura, unable to take in the situation, fainted.

"Alright, alright. I'll get you a first addition copy the same day I give it to the editor. But no signatures for obvious reasons," Naruto said with a smile. He had to laugh at the face Anko made.

"But Naru-chan!" Anko whined with a cute frown. "I want the series signed by the author himself! Please!"

"I can't refuse a face like that," Naruto replied. He rubbed his chin in thought, "How about some spoilers on the fifth book? Like who Yuki chooses after she found out that Kano cheated on her or how she gets her revenge."

Stars flashed in Anko's eyes. "Please tell me Yuki chooses Hiroshi over Kenichi! Kenichi is nice, but he is too involved with his work. Hiroshi is perfect for her! And Kano better be slaughtered! Torture! Torture him for what he did to Yuki after she set up all those things for him to make that night special only to find out he slept with her best friend AND killed Shingo!"

"Easy there," Naruto said to his avid fan. "I'll tell you after the exam. Or in the forest if you're feeling adventurous."

"In the forest, huh?" Anko asked with an eyebrow raised and a suggestive smile on her face. "It could be like Yuki's first time, bathed in moonlight under the trees."

"I was thinking more of how she would sneak out of her house to try to be with Shingo. Like how-" The sight of his teammates cut him off. Sasuke was staring, unblinking, at him with his mouth open and eyes wide. A bit of drool was starting to form from him staying in that position for so long. Sakura was passed on the ground next to him. "Um, I guess I'll talk to you later. Just find me and I'll give you that spoiler."

Naruto waved goodbye to Anko and let his cold exterior take control of him again. He walked passed his teammates and sat down with his back resting against the rock Sasuke was sitting on. He decided he didn't care enough about them to bring them back to their senses. Time would do that for him. He entered the seal while he waited for the exam to start.

_Fifteen minutes ago..._

"WE'RE GONNA BE LATE!" Naruto and Anko shouted together in union. They grabbed their supplies and began running to the training field.

The duo was only about five seconds into the run before Naruto suggested, "Hey, since we're already late, why don't we walk and take our time. No reason to waste more energy." Anko agreed and they slowed down to a walk.

While they were walking, Anko suddenly remembered something. "Hey Naru-chan, you said that Aino Masa was dead."

"Yeah," Naruto replied evenly. His sorrow over the old man was long gone. He waited for her to finish, but already had an idea as to what she might be leading to. But there was no way that she, a woman, could possibly...?

"Well, I got a magazine recently that seems to be published by him. However, it was first published a month ago and the latest was published last Friday. Here, look." Anko pulled out a magazine that made Naruto break down into a fit of laughter: For Men: The Shinobi Life 4. He grabbed it and began flipping through his hard work (insert giggle). "... I'm guessing you've heard of it, you little perv?"

"Something like that..." Naruto muttered with a grin. He turned the magazine side-ways. A passerby looked inside the magazine but quickly looked away, blushing. Naruto closed it back up and returned it to Anko, who was interested in his lack of 'typical male reaction.' Naruto then pulled out another magazine, making Anko's eyes widen. For Men: The Shinobi Life 5, in progress, was presented to her.

Anko made a fast snatch for the notebook, a Joonin fast grab that couldn't be seen by normal eyes, but Naruto deftly pulled the book out of her reach and returned it to its original spot. For a few seconds, Anko stared at him in awe before saying, "So you're…. You're Aino Masa?"

Naruto winked at her, "He's dead, remember?"

Anko frowned, but her amazement was still visible in her eyes. "Well I know that, but I mean, _you're_ the writer for that magazine? You're_ the_ Aino Masa?" Naruto grinned, but didn't say anything. "What?! Whe- who- HOW?!"

Naruto shrugged, "I got bored one day and decided to just write something… And I was getting tired of Icha Icha Paridise's lack of action, in both forms of the word."

"Wow, that's my exact reason for switching to your series from Jiraiya's." Anko went quiet for a second. She turned slyly to Naruto and asked, "So… Where did you get your material? You don't window peak do you?"

Naruto was quiet for a second. He closed his eyes and sighed.

_Flashback…_

_Kyuubi, in her fox form, stood sat down in front of Naruto next to a giant TV screen. She was wearing an army helmet and wielding a long ruler that made sharp snap sounds whenever she pointed at something. The screen lit up, showing a naked girl to ten year old Naruto, who blushed but didn't look away. He figured she was poor and couldn't afford clothes, like him, except she didn't have Sarutobi looking out for her. Kyuubi snapped the ruler at the screen pointing at the girl. She growled in a military tone, "__**This is the enemy, soldier!**__" She moved the ruler... lower. "__**And THIS is the target.**__"_

End of Flashback…

"Um, let's just say I had outside sources who helped me," Naruto said quietly after a few second of reminiscing. It was one of the more unpleasant, or very pleasant, experiences in his life.

Anko grew a sweatdrop, but didn't press the subject. She instead asked, "So how did you get an editor for this?"

"Well, it wasn't too hard really. I submit them to him by mail with the fake name. He read the first one, loved it, and messaged back agreeing to be my publisher."

Anko frowned, "Wouldn't he notice that he was sending his reply to the 'demons lair' or something like that?"

Naruto sighed, reminded of the many things he has to do just to get around the daily shit he had to put up with. "I use a henge and go into a post office, where I had set up an account so my mail gets sent there and I can pick it up anonymously. No one is knows that they are actually helping the 'demon', so it benefits both sides."

Anko quieted for a second, finally understanding what the kid had to do to survive, what he still has to do. Finally she grinned and said, "So… Can I be the first to read the next book?"

Naruto placed a hand over the notebook's hiding spot and said with a dangerously serious face. "One innocent as you shouldn't see stuff like that." He tried to avoid looking at her eyes, but he couldn't last long and the second he saw her glaring, chocolate orbs he burst out laughing. It seemed to be contagious as after a second, Anko joined him.

When he sobered, Naruto said, "Alright, alright. I'll get you a first addition copy the same day I give it to the editor. But no signatures for obvious reasons," Naruto said with a smile. He had to laugh at the face Anko made.

"But Naru-chan!" Anko whined with a cute frown. "I want the series signed by the author himself! Please!"

"I can't refuse a face like that," Naruto replied. He rubbed his chin in thought, "How about some spoilers on the fifth book? Like who Yuki chooses after she found out that Kano cheated on her or how she gets her revenge."

Stars flashed in Anko's eyes. "Please tell me Yuki chooses Hiroshi over Kenichi! Kenichi is nice, but he is too involved with his work. Hiroshi is perfect for her! And Kano better be slaughtered! Torture! Torture him for what he did to Yuki after she set up all those things for him to make that night special only to find out he slept with her best friend AND killed Shingo!"

"Easy there," Naruto said to his avid fan. "I'll tell you after the exam. Or in the forest if you're feeling adventurous."

"In the forest, huh?" Anko asked with an eyebrow raised and a suggestive smile on her face. "It could be like Yuki's first time, bathed in moonlight under the trees."

"I was thinking more of how she would sneak out of her house to try to be with Shingo. Like how-" The sight of his teammates cut him off. Sasuke was staring, unblinking, at him with his mouth open and eyes wide. A bit of drool was starting to form from him staying in that position for so long. Sakura was passed on the ground next to him. "Um, I guess I'll talk to you later. Just find me and I'll give you that spoiler."

_At the present, inside the seal…_

Naruto was looking down into the pond, watching the other Chuunin as Anko gave her intro speech. Naruto knew that what she said about the place was true, even though the Genin were encouraging themselves by saying it's just to scare them. He saw Anko look at him and throw a kunai.

Naruto quickly projected himself back in control of his body just as the kunai grazed his cheek. Anko appeared behind him, pinning his arm behind his back. She licked the blood that trickled down his cheek off but suddenly paused mid lick. Naruto spun his body out of her grip, facing her. He licked a drop of blood off her face from a small cut that had just opened. He winked at her, earning a catcall from somewhere in the crowd.

Anko's mind raced. _It was such a small movement, there was no way that…_ she thought to herself. Yet the slight sting on her cheek proved that to be false. When she had appeared behind him and grabbed his arm, she saw his finger twitch slightly right before she grabbed him. She thought it was nothing, but looking back, he had thrown a glass senbon needle that she didn't see and it had glanced her face. "Well played, Naru-chan," she whispered (1).

"I try," he whispered back with a grin.

Anko did the leaf-teleport ability and appeared in front of the group again, trying to regain some of her pride. She shouted, "Alright, get your scrolls and go to your gates now. They will open in exactly five minutes."

Sasuke stared at his teammate with a glare, yet he could not deny his astonishment. "How? How did you do that, dobe?"

Naruto didn't turn around from his spot in front of the group. Instead of answering, he said, "From the start, I want you guys to go straight. Defend yourselves well. Do not engage anyone without me there. At the first sound of something abnormal, I want you to cover yourselves. I will be back with you guys within one day. It shouldn't take too long for me to get someone else's scroll."

"Do you mean to tell me that you are going to split up with us?" Sasuke asked, his voice burning with anger… and jealousy.

Naruto turned his head slightly, staring right into Sasuke's coal black eyes. "Protect her. The Sound are here for two reasons only. The first is to cover up what's _going_ to happen. The other reason… the other reason is to kill the Konoha Genin."

Sasuke grit his teeth. "Then why don't you stay with us and take their scroll when they confront us? Scared?"

Naruto turned his head back towards the gate, counting off the seconds until it opened. "They have the Earth scroll; we need a Heaven." Ten, nine, eight, seven. "And Sasuke, at the first hint of the Sand team… run the other way." Two, one, OPEN!

Naruto lurched with his legs, the grass behind him coming up in chunks from his force. He disappeared into the blackness. Sasuke and Sakura followed but were unable to catch sight of him. Sasuke, refusing to be out done, traveled with extreme speed. He jumped up into the trees and tried to lurch from branch to branch with the same force as Naruto, but he didn't know that Naruto had infused his legs with chakra to make that jump. In his ignorance, he tried harder and harder, soon leaving Sakura behind.

Sakura struggled to keep up with Sasuke. With each jump, he got further and further away from her. She called his name, but he didn't seem to hear her. Soon, he also was out of her sight. Sakura slowed down after she lost track of her teammates. She stopped on a branch, looking in the direction she thought he had left to. "Sasuke… What's gotten into you?" She looked around for any trace of human life. She heard an inhuman roar from some large beast not that far away and shivered. What ever that was, it could tear her into pieces before she even knew what was happening.

Tears leaked from Sakura's eyes when she saw that neither teammate was coming back from her. She was on her own. She would have to fend for herself, against the dangers of the forest. With that thought, her resolve hardened. She decided to stay away from any form of life, human or not, and would try to find her teammates. Besides, she figured, who would go after her? It's not like she had a scroll and was useful or anything. With that thought, she ignored the sorrow rising in her chest and jumped off into the direction she thought she saw Sasuke jump off into.

Naruto felt Sasuke break off from Sakura and cursed. _**Fools**_, Kyuubi muttered. Naruto agreed. _**Are we going after the Sound first or something more important?**_

Naruto glanced to his left, where he saw the Mist Genin scouting. He continued his high speed travel. _They will come to us. I need to save people from the Sand before Gaara kills the other Genin. They have a Heaven scroll, so I just need… ah, there they are._

With a final lurch, Naruto landed in front of a group of Genin. Kiba, Shino, and Hinata stood before him. He pulled out a kunai and settled into the Genin offensive stance so that they would understand his intentions. Without comment, Shino stepped in front of Hinata.

Kibda tried for peacemaker. "Hey, Naruto. What are you doing here?" Even so, Kiba readied himself for an upcoming fight, albeit more subtly than Shino.

Naruto looked only at Shino, even as he spoke to all of them. "I'm here for two reasons. One, I am going to have to ask you for your scroll."

"No way!" Kiba growled. "We only have to take that Heaven scroll from the Sand team then we'll be done. Shino tracked them already and we are almost to them."

Although he didn't need it, that confirmed Naruto's suspicion. He still hadn't moved his eyes from Shino, whom he knew to have the scroll. "The second is to tell you to stay away from the sand, and the sound, team. After I take your scroll, search out another Earth before looking for a Heaven." He held his hand out to Shino.

Something clicked in Shino's head. He knew of the dangers that the red head from the sand brought. He had heard the reading from Kabuto's card, and his bugs shivered in fear when he was near. He understood Naruto's intentions and pulled out the scroll. As he began to hand it to Naruto, a hand stopped him.

Hinata had grabbed Shino's arm. She looked confused, but determined. When they all turned to her, her face turned red and she let go of Shino's arm. This, however, prompted Kiba to react. "Naruto, I know I can't fight you and Shino, and I know I probably couldn't beat just you, so I'll let you have the scroll. Can you at least tell me why?" Naruto turned his gaze from Shino and leveled his eyes onto Kiba's glare.

"If you meet a sound team, or the sand team, you will die." With that, he grabbed the scroll and poofed out of existence, leaving his almost friends behind.

Naruto raced through the trees towards where he knew the sand team to be. Kiba was right; they were almost to the team. He didn't have to travel far. Naruto arrived just as an unfortunate Rain Genin team was crushed by Gaara's sand. The Sand squad turned around and faced him. Naruto did Kakashi's eye smile, ignoring the bleeding sand that slowly returned back to its master. "Yo!"

_Elsewhere…_

Sasuke stopped on a tree branch somewhere in the middle of the forest. He was panting hard and tried to locate Naruto. Not seeing him, he growled and continued onward. Not long after he left, another form landed on the branch he had been on before. "Sasuke-kun…" The form whispered, before licking its lips. It jumped after him.

Sasuke suddenly stopped jumping. He spun around fast, already doing handseals. He let out a fire ball at something behind him. He knew he was being followed, but now whatever it was had gotten too close. A dark form dodged the fireball, smirking viciously.

_Back with Naruto…_

"So we are agreed?" Naruto asked coldly. He held the Earth Scroll out. Sand came up and grabbed it. Naruto didn't flinch as the course material slithered around his wrist, knowing very well that it could snap the bone like a twig before he could do anything. It grabbed the scroll and retreated back to its master. Gaara grabbed the scroll from his sand and turned in the direction of the tower. He began walking. His siblings followed after him, both not once glancing at Naruto.

After he lost sight of them, Naruto cracked his neck and sent out his senses, like he had done in Wave Country. He felt a Mist team and a Sound team. Reaching further, he saw that the Mist team was going after Shikamaru's team and that they had a Heaven scroll. The Sound team, with an Earth scroll, was going after Sakura. Naruto weighed his options and sighed. He decided to do the right thing. Infusing his legs with chakra, he lurched off into the trees.

Naruto moved quickly. He had time, he knew. However, he wanted to get this exam over as soon as possible. Bad feelings had been creeping up and down his spine ever since he first agreed to take part in it. He noticed he was close to his target and gave one final lurched, landing in the center of a clearing, alone. He looked at the log that he Ino, Shikamaru, and Chouji to be hiding behind. Sakura could have fun by herself with the Sound. Besides, he had rationalized, after rescuing her, she would only be a burden. It would be best for her to be picked up last.

_**They're going to kill her. You know that right?**_ Kyuubi asked without really caring. Naruto shrugged. He felt the three Mist-nin approaching, and he turned to their general direction.

_And back with Sasuke…_

The hideous, smirking face retracted its long neck, blood gleaming on its inhuman fangs. Sasuke screamed while clutching his neck, the pain spreading through his nerves like a poison. His bleary eyes, no longer the Sharingan, barely caught sight of that _thing_ taking his scroll and destroying it before he lost conscious. His body wobbled before tumbling off the branch and into the wild forest life on the ground.

Naruto slipped the scroll from the leader Mist-nin's hand. They were of average strength, and good intentions; both things that had to be done away with in order to beat him. He felt the three Konoha Genin watching him, but he didn't make eye contact with them.

As he straightened himself, he thought he heard something. A terrible feeling in his spine had him moving before he sent out his senses. When he had done so, he saw Sakura already captured by the Sound, which was expected. But reaching further, across the forest, Naruto felt Sasuke. His lifeforce was weak, almost to fatal levels, but he didn't seem to be getting worse. Naruto focused on his downed teammate. No, he wasn't getting worse. In fact, Sasuke's lifeforce was slowly getting stronger… and - Naruto's eyes narrowed - darker.

_Ready for a quick moment of freedom?_ Naruto asked mildly. Kyuubi sensed what he had in mind and nodded.

_Not long after… (2)_

Dosu looked up, catching a small movement out of the corner of his eye. He thought he saw something red move through the bushes. He used his advanced hearing to detect any sounds nearby, even the small air displacements of bugs walking on the ground. However, what he heard masked all other sounds. It was deep breathing, the kind belong to a large animal. He sighed and braced himself. Abnormally large animals were becoming a common occurrence in this forest.

Through subtle hand motions, the others in his team were alerted to the new threat and they moved into action. They maneuvered their captive into a mildly protected location that was at least out of sight in case anything came to take her away. Dosu motioned to an area in the trees, in which Zaku replied with a slight nod. He took a step forward and suddenly yelled, breaking the silence that had gathered in the forest. Wind blast exploded from his hands in the direction Dosu had pointed.

Trees were ripped up from the violent winds. Animal cries went unheard as the storm ripped their small bodies to pieces. When it was finished, a dark hole was left where mighty trees once stood. In the hole, something growled. Kin sprang into action, throwing her threaded shuriken at the unseen beast. She felt the projectiles hit their marks with dull 'thunks' through the threads. She grinned with satisfaction and yanked the threads in an attempted to drag the target into the open. Kin let out a short cry in shock as her pull was met with no resistance and she fell back, hitting the ground.

Without warning, a figure lurched out of the darkness. Dosu was caught unaware as it landed on him. With wide eyes, he froze stiff upon staring at an oversized fox. It had blood red fur and its maw was big enough to cleanly remove his head, along with a good chunk of his torso. The fangs dripped thick saliva onto his face, leaving him in a trance of fear. Zaku and Kin were of no help as they too were scared stiff by the beast. The monstrosity of a fox suddenly let out a killing intent so strong that they all jerked in their breathing, their lungs caving in on them.

Kyuubi growled low and deep as she stared down at the pathetic human under her. Satisfied at her ability to instill fear into her foes even with a one tail's power, she finally continued her task. Without warning, she devoured the upper half of the man under her. With his blood dripping down her fangs, she turned to the others. She felt the girl go through a bowel movement. Kyuubi jump and swatted her with a paw, sending her into a tree with a deadly snap sound meaning her spine was most likely broken. Kyuubi then moved to the man who had sent that powerful wind her way.

Kyuubi inspected her claws. In order to not get thrown back like everything else, she had had to dig her claws into the ground. Even then, it had been difficult to prevent going airborne. She sniffed. Claws were meant to tear, to shred, to mangle, not help stay on the ground. The pressure that involved had hurt them. She looked back to the Sound-nin and let out a vicious growl. She wouldn't kill him, no. He deserved something more… fitting for what he had done to her precious claws. She pounced.

Zaku nearly shat himself when the beast landed on him. He couldn't move due to the fear that seemed to be coursing through his veins, let alone defend himself. He could only stare with wide eyes as the beast growled down at him, maw only inches from his face. He didn't need to look at Dosu's corpse to know what would happen to him. Without warning, the breast shifted its weight and he felt excruciating pain erupt in his arms. With a snap, both were broken in both the humorous, and the lower arm bones. As he screamed in agony, the pain lifted the fog in his mind brought by the killing intent.

When the beast hopped off him unexpectedly, bringing more pain in his arms, Zaku rolled to the side and sprinted away in an attempt to escape with his life. Kyuubi let him go; he would give the message to the Sound leader that he was _not_ to mess with Konoha… even if she despised the village herself.

Now Kyuubi could have her fun. She advanced towards where she new Sakura was hiding. She sent her chakra into the girl, just enough to revive her from unconsciousness. Sakura slowly woke up. When her vision cleared and she sat up, Kyuubi presented herself with a wicked grin that could easily be mistaken for a deadly threat. Blood stained her teeth enhanced the visual. She patiently waited, holding the pose, as she watched the pink girl with amusement. First came the girl wetting her pants, then attempting to scream but not being able to make a sound, then the flailing arms, then she fainted. Oh yes, Naruto was right to send Kyuubi to retrieve Sakura.

Kyuubi picked the girl up with her teeth, careful to avoid the soiled garments, and bounded off towards where she new Naruto to be.

_On the other side of the forest…_

Naruto noticed Sasuke's lifeforce increase to a level large enough to match his rested, conscious amount. However, with the lifeforce returned, the darkness continued to corrupt his chakra and increased it in that dark form. The chakra also returned to normal amounts, but then it rose higher and higher. Naruto studied Sasuke with narrow eyes. He stayed hidden, observing, but he made sure to stay ready. He didn't trust this new, dark chakra.

Naruto couldn't describe that new chakra. He was familiar with Kyuubi's chakra, the destructive kind, but this was something else. People called Kyuubi's chakra demonic, but this was the true definition of that. As he silently watched, he noticed with cold control as the chakra rose to his normal amount and continued growing. Sasuke was full of so much power his very body became enshrouded with the power, giving him a dark purple glow. When Naruto felt Sasuke return to conscious, he knew he had to act. He crept out of his hiding spot, into the open, and into Sasuke's view.

Sasuke was a monstrosity. He was surrounded in the corrupted, purple power. He had inky black marking covering the left half of his face. With a wicked smirk, he advanced towards Naruto. The chakra that surrounded him gathered into his palm. Naruto tensed, but he didn't back down. Sasuke got within melee distance, and in a move too fast for anyone's eyes, except his own Sharingan, smashed the purple orb into Naruto's chest.

Naruto felt blinding pain burning through his abdomen as he was launched back into the forest. That was too fast, and Sasuke had done it to his teammate no less. Naruto crashed into a tree, knocking the wind out of him, before he broke through it and continued his momentum through the air. He hit a few things of brush before bouncing off the ground, scraping his body, and hitting another tree, this one thicker and absorbing his body into it. Naruto gasped as he made contact. He shivered from the raw pain coursing through him.

Naruto shoved himself out of the crater in the tree, falling to the ground twenty yards below. He stood up in a slow, but fluid, motion. Blood was dripping down his arm from a puncture wound in his shoulder, down his now broken left wrist. He had a burned hole in the front, on his stomach where the seal was. It felt like it was on fire, and he could see the purple chakra still on him like some liquid, purple leach. Skin was sizzling where it was. Naruto bent down, picking up some dirt, and used it to wipe away the corrupted chakra. He wouldn't allow himself to touch more of it with bare skin.

Naruto looked back up, seeing the path he had flown through. Suddenly, he saw a flash of movement before a fist slammed into his face and he was propelled through the air once more. Naruto was sure his jaw was broken from the hit, but he scowled in the air no less. This time, he was more prepared for the attack and was already flooding himself with the Kyuubi's chakra. He could feel himself healing slowly. He released it to dangerous amounts, he was guessing three tails worth, but Kyuubi herself wasn't there to confirm that.

Naruto knew this would have devastating ramifications in the future, but he knew it was necessary. The destructive chakra flowed through him like a violent storm. It tore at the barriers in his mind, trying to corrupt him into a violent – for lack of a better term – demon, much like Zabuza had become. Naruto held the barriers strong. He couldn't afford that now, not with Kyuubi gone. _He better get back fast or there will be hell to pay if my barriers fall._

Naruto's hand turned into chakra infused claws which he stabbed into the ground, slowing his flight as dirt was tore up by his dragging claws. He didn't need to send his senses out; he could feel everything happening in the forest in this state. As he stood back up, his eyes narrowed. Sasuke could feel everything too. Naruto felt Sasuke approaching but wasn't able to get a grasp on exactly how much power Sasuke now had. It must rival his own now.

Naruto felt the chakra tearing at his barriers, but he fought it passively as he lurched forward, into the forest, towards Sasuke. He met him mid-leap. Naruto caught Sasuke's fist in his own, ignoring the pretty-boy's surprised face as he delivered a punch of his own. Sasuke's momentum was roughly turned from forward to straight down. He hit the ground hard, making a deep crater. The whole forest shook from the force. Naruto didn't allow Sasuke to recover. He lurched down into the crater and grabbed Sasuke's shirt.

Sasuke was in shock. He felt dazed by Naruto's hit, which had _not_ expected in his confidence. At the same time, he was shocked that he _hadn't felt a thing_ from the hit. Before he could recover, Sasuke felt someone grab his shirt, but he barely saw a black form before his head was crushed into the ground, knocking him unconscious.

Naruto sighed, feeling the fire of the destructive chakra burning through his veins. He expelled it from his system, relieved at the feel of his normal chakra. Naruto suddenly wavered, having no strength to continue standing. Three tails worth of chakra, for only one minute, had completely weakened him after recovering his wounds and burning his insides. Naruto collapsed, falling unconscious next to Sasuke.

Not long after, Kyuubi arrived at the crater. Naruto had given her two tails worth of chakra this time, so she still had enough chakra to do what was necessary. She dropped Sakura next to the two boys and looked around. She whistled at the damage done to the forest. Well, as best as a fox could whistle. She released the scroll she had picked up from the Sound team and put it next to the one Naruto had picked up from the Mist.

Kyuubi performed a genjutsu with her chakra, something that could only be broken by a Sharingan or someone with destructive chakra of their own. That, for the most part, meant that the three would be safe. Kyuubi checked the surroundings once more before allowing herself to return to the seal.

_Inside the seal…_

Naruto watched with passivity as Kyuubi appeared with a flash of red light. In slight retribution, Naruto made her appear above the boiling pool, now the size of a lake to compensate for her size, that she had scalded him with as she trained him in chakra control. Kyuubi landed with a splash and made a large groan. "**Ohhh, a spa feels so good after a hard day's work.**" Naruto sighed, it was worth a shot. Kyuubi doggy paddled over to him. "**What happened, weakling? I saw the damage, and, of course, your weakness led to you being unconscious once again.**"

Naruto shrugged as he sat down. "Sasuke got some corrupted power boost. I knocked him out, curbing its power for the most part." He paused, to let that sink in. He yawned and said with disinterest, "Oh, and I may, or may not, have had to use three tails worth of power to do it."

The Kyuubi gagged violently on the breath she was taking. Naruto refused to grin, but on the inside he was laughing. _Serves him right. He burns me in that pool then takes a relaxing soak._

Kyuubi finished her coughing and leveled a glare on the small boy in front of her. "**You WHAT?! Do you understand how dangerous that is when I'm not here to guide you? To keep you from the corruption caused by my chakra.**"

Naruto shrugged. "It worked out didn't it?"

Kyuubi slammed a paw on the ground next to Naruto, sending up dust into his eyes, which he ignored. Kyuubi shoved her face right into his, only inches from him. "**Do not be flippant with me, child! You won't always be so lucky!**"

Naruto reached up and patted the giant beast's nose in a cocky manner. "And that would now be four to four, a tie."

Kyuubi blinked once, before groaning loudly. She sank into the water and glared at Naruto. Their game "Who can get under who's skin." How could she miss that? She flipped him off with her middle tail (3), but Naruto had pulled out his notebook and was working on his story and didn't see it.

Naruto sketched a picture silently, his mind racing with the details of what happened and what he was going to do. In a few hours, he would get up, pick up his teammates, and continue to the tower. However, Sasuke's power disturbed him. For some reason, he suspected Orochimaru, but he couldn't be sure. In the meant time, he would have to cut off that corrupted power and most likely have to fix the corruption in Sasuke's mind as well. Then, he smirked, he would go meet Anko. With a few final marks in his notebook, Naruto closed it. He had his plans, now all he had to do was wait.

_Outside the seal…_

"Naruto-kun," a shadowy figure licked its lips with a grossly enlarged tongue. "You have stopped Sasuke for now, but he will soon come to me, begging for more power. There is nothing you, or the Kyuubi, can do to stop me." Orochimaru, in his Genin disguise, grinned at the area where he knew them to be hiding. He blew a kiss to them in a creepy, pedophilic way before jumping away. Naruto and Sasuke shivered involuntarily.

* * *

(1) Yes, there is a reason Naruto was able to do this. It's not just because he's amazing.

(2) I don't know if it seems like it to you, but I feel like I'm doing too many scene changes. Sorry if this annoys you, but it's the best method to filter through all the boring trash of talking and unimportant things where you already know what happens, like Sasuke's fight with Orochimaru. You may be thinking "Well, I want to see how Sasuke did one vs one against the snake. It could be interesting." However, as the author, I'll tell you that it was, in fact, not very interesting. Sasuke tried valiantly, but Orochimaru was just playing with him and in the long run Sasuke lost, sad and pathetic, just like in the anime. Other things are kept in the dark for theatrical reasons, like this next scene.

(3) That would be the fifth tail if you're interested.

* * *

Well, it certainly has been a long time since I updated. Um... I hope you enjoy it. This will prolly be the last update for a long, long time.

Churro: Wohoo! Only seven thousand words this time. An easy edit.

Sub-Zero879: Oh, were the other ones so much harder? Three thousand words are the difference between a good edit and you missing me write Hedge instead of Henge?

Churro: Whoa there, most authors can't even write three thousand words in their whole story. Don't try to pull that on me.

Sub-Zero879: (sigh) I guess your right. I don't understand that... People can write apparantly six chapters in only... two thousand words? What is that, three hundred words a chapter?

Churro: Hm, I think I might just go and 'beta' their stories instead. That would be so much easier.

Sub-Zero879: (looks around the box) Uh huh. And how will you get there? Pick up the box and run?

Churro: Hah! We live in a time of the future. I can send messages to them through the INTERNET! I can message someone millions of miles away in a push of a button.

Sub-Zero879: However, its my keyboard, so... what button are you planning on pressing exactly?

Churro: (pause) Touche.

* * *

.,-"Omake"-,. (Just the finished scene of Kyuubi's Sex-Ed that I decided to cut back for the sake of innocence.)

_Kyuubi, in her fox form, stood sat down in front of Naruto next to a giant TV screen. She was wearing an army helmet and wielding a long ruler that made sharp snap sounds whenever she pointed at something. The screen lit up, showing a naked girl to ten year old Naruto, who blushed but didn't look away. He figured she was poor and couldn't afford clothes, like him, except she didn't have Sarutobi looking out for her. Kyuubi snapped the ruler at the screen pointing at the girl. She growled in a military tone, "__**This is the enemy, soldier!**__" She moved the ruler... lower. "__**And THIS is the target.**__" She snapped the ruler to the girls face, specifically her lips. "__**You'll start here, at the enemy HQ. Then, you'll move out, south. When you reach the twin mountains, you need to make it to the two check points. We have lost many soldiers who tried to slip between them and rush the objective, but we will NOT lose you that way. First, you will need to travel up the west mountain but make sure you plant a hand grenade HERE!**__" She snapped the ruler on the "east mountain." "__**After reaching the check point on the west mountain, you may continue to your objective. Beware, this final journey is a perilous one. You must travel at an appropriate speed or else you will be compromised. Too fast and you will never get to the objective again. Too slow and you'll never have a chance to get there.**__" She dragged the ruler as she spoke._

_Kyuubi finally reached the 'objective.' The screen changed from the girl to a full screen view of the 'objective.' __**"IF you reach your objective, you are not in the clear yet. You must hold your reinforcements for a particular time. If you charge from the start, the war's over, and you have LOST. You must wait for the enemy to strike first. When you notice the first wave come, then you can go. Send in the troops and if you're lucky, you will have captured the enemy, permanently.**__" Kyuubi lifted the ruler from its spot on the screen and pointed it straight at Naruto. Her tone became solemn, "__**And soldier, you best have proper equipment when making your advance. If you don't, you will soon lose your hold over the enemy and then another faction will share your conquered territory. Trust me, you do NOT want to lose anything the enemy has to offer.**__"_

_The screen changed again and Kyuubi snapped the ruler back to it. This time the girl was bending over. She _must_ have dropped something and was trying to pick it up. Kyuubi looked back at Naruto. "__**That was one of many ways to reach the objective. A true soldier must know as many strategies as possible to reach them if he is to survive. In some territories, you will find that you may send in the hounds of war, hence the name of this strategy, which is called…**__" And the lessons continued. Innocent Naruto learned many things over the next few days. After five days, he was the true soldier, ready for any form of combat. Yeah…_


End file.
